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Well, please turn with me in 
your Bibles to Proverbs chapter 31. Proverbs chapter 31. Today is, in fact, the Lord's 
Day, but it doesn't preclude us from remembering mothers and 
addressing mothers. Specifically, if you're not a 
mother here, I suspect that you know one. So through the course 
of the sermon, perhaps you might make a note on how to pray for 
that mother that you know. are somehow connected to. But 
I do want to set forth some thoughts from the book of Proverbs, specifically 
chapter 31, concerning mothers. Beginning in chapter 31 at verse 
10, hear now the word of the living and true God. Who can 
find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely 
trusts her, so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good 
and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks wool and 
flax and willingly works with her hands. She is like the merchant 
ships. She brings her food from afar. 
She also rises while it is yet night and provides food for her 
household and a portion for her maidservants. She considers a 
field and buys it. From her profits she plants a 
vineyard. She girds herself with strength and strengthens her 
arms. She perceives that her merchandise is good and her lamp 
does not go out by night. She stretches out her hands to 
the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle. She extends her 
hand to the poor. Yes, she reaches out her hands 
to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for 
her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet. She 
makes tapestry for herself. Her clothing is fine linen and 
purple. Her husband is known in the gates 
when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen 
garments and sells them and supplies sashes for the merchants. Strength 
and honor are her clothing. She shall rejoice in time to 
come. She opens her mouth with wisdom and on her tongue is the 
law of kindness. She watches over the ways of 
her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children 
rise up and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises 
her. Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. 
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears 
the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her 
hands and let her own works praise her in the gates. Amen. Let us 
pray. Our Heavenly Father, we thank 
you for the written word. We thank you that it is given 
by inspiration of God. It's profitable to us for doctrine, 
reproof, correction, and instruction in righteousness. And we pray 
that the Spirit who gave it would be the Spirit who guides us now 
as we study Scripture. We would ask that Your Spirit 
would be at work in our minds and in our hearts, that You would 
teach us from Your truth and cause us to be affected by these 
truths, and may You cause us as believers to pursue obedience 
to the things revealed herein. And God, for any and all outside 
of Christ, we pray that today would be the day of salvation, 
For certainly the fear of the Lord is set forth positively 
in this passage. Paul tells us, there is no fear 
of God before the eyes of those who are dead in their trespasses 
and sins. So we pray to you, our God, that 
you would open hearts and eyes to the truth as it is in Jesus, 
that you would indeed exercise that sovereign grace and call 
effectually unto Christ those who are presently dead in their 
trespasses and sins. And we do pray for all mothers, 
all grandmothers, those who are charged with the responsibilities 
in this passage, that you would strengthen them and help them 
to be faithful. Certainly, in many ways, it is 
a thankless task. It is a non-ending task. And 
we just commit them to you and pray that you would guide them, 
guard them, watch over them, and strengthen them. And do forgive 
us now for all of our transgressions and our sins. When we look at 
your holy law, Lord God, it does reveal to us who you are, but 
it also reveals who we are. And we are vile in the sight 
of a holy God. So we plead the merit and the 
mercy and the forgiveness of the Lord Jesus Christ. We pray 
for cleansing and that fount that is open for sin and uncleanness. And we pray these things through 
Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen. Well, Proverbs 31, verses 
10 to 31 are indeed a familiar passage of scripture. I'm certain 
that you're all familiar with them in one form or another. 
And it does indeed describe the virtuous wife. It's an interesting 
passage in terms of the Hebrew construction. It's what's called 
an acrostic. So each of the verses begin with 
a letter of the Hebrew alphabet. And then interestingly, in the 
Hebrew canon, the book of Ruth follows Proverbs. And in many 
respects, Ruth is an illustration or an application of what we 
find here in verses 10 to 31, in Proverbs 31. And as Solomon, 
or as rather the author, sketches forth this picture of a godly 
woman, he highlights the fact that she is diligent, she is 
spiritual, she is self-control. As a wife, she is trustworthy, 
and she does good for her husband. This is a tall order of good 
set forth in this passage, and certainly the Spirit is necessary 
to apply this consistently in one's life. But as I said, I 
want to focus on the Christian mother. And this is a sense where 
we're going to look at Proverbs here, but we'll look at other 
passages as well. And I want to look at four things 
concerning the Christian mother. First, her condition before God. Secondly, her influence over 
her children. Thirdly, her authority over her 
children. And fourthly, her responsibility 
toward her children. Now, God's Word is not lacking 
in this instruction. Throughout Scripture, we see 
this emphasis, and we see it encompassed in the fifth commandment. Honor your father and your mother. It is absolutely crucial that 
we understand biblical motherhood before a holy God. But in the 
first place, with reference to her condition before God, she 
is saved by grace. We are describing the Christian 
mother, not the unbelieving mother, but the Christian mother, and 
she is saved by grace. Note the emphasis there, specifically 
in verse 30. Charm is deceitful and beauty 
is passing, but a woman who fears Yahweh, she shall be praised. It's the fear of God that characterizes 
or that marks her life. The Apostle Paul tells us in 
Romans chapter 3, when he highlights the fact that there is none righteous, 
no not one, there is none who seeks after God, there is none 
who does the will of God, he summarizes the entirety in Romans 
3.18 by saying, there is no fear of God before their eyes. The 
prophet Jeremiah, God using him, speaking to the New Covenant, 
or concerning the New Covenant, God the Lord says, I will put 
the fear of me in their hearts. So when we look at this Christian 
mother, displayed here on the pages of Proverbs 31, her condition 
before God is that she is saved by the grace of God. It's not 
the case that because of her virtue, because of her effectiveness 
at being a mother, because of the fact that she rises early, 
and that she produces, and that she makes a lot of money, and 
that she provides well for her family, that then God blesses 
her with salvation. It is never the case that a woman 
will ever enter into heaven based on her deeds, based on her performance, 
You can be the best woman, the best wife, the best mother, but 
you are still dead in your trespasses and sins. God's grace must make 
you alive. God must effectually call you. 
God must put the fear of God in the heart of those who believe. 
And this is the emphasis in this passage. So ladies, if you are 
not a believer here this morning, don't just look for five helpful 
tips on how to deal with your nasty children, but rather look 
to the Lord Jesus Christ. Look to the one in whom there 
is salvation. Look to the one in whom alone 
there is forgiveness. She is saved by God's grace. And then this is crucial in terms 
of the application of God's command with reference to motherhood. 
You can turn to the book of Titus. Titus chapter 2, Titus chapter 
2, wherein you see the connection between God's saving grace and 
our ability to function the way the Lord calls us to in this 
current world. Notice the particular instructions 
in Titus 2, verses 1-3. I mean, the whole section here 
in chapter 2 is emphasis on how persons are supposed to conduct 
themselves. The older men are addressed in 
verse 2. The older women are addressed 
in verse 3. Younger women, notice specifically 
in verses 4 and 5, that they admonish the young women. This 
is the role of the older women in the church. Older women in 
the church are looking for a ministry in the church. Befriend the younger 
women and tell them how to mother their children. Befriend the 
younger women and disciple them and mentor them and instruct 
them on how they are to do the sorts of things that Paul enjoins 
upon us here. Notice in verse 4, that they, 
the older women, admonish the young women to love their husbands, 
to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, 
good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not 
be blaspheme. You see the stakes are high, 
ladies, with reference to your conduct towards your husbands 
and towards your children. If you are engaged in unbelieving 
type of living, if you look no different than the pagan or the 
heathen that lives next door to you, what's at stake is that 
the Word of God may not be blasphemed. In other words, you've been saved 
to function in a particular way. God has given you this mandate. But He doesn't expect you, or 
He knows, rather, that you cannot do this apart from His grace. 
Further in the section, young men are addressed. Perhaps we'll 
hit that when we get to Father's Day. And then later, bond servants 
are addressed in verses 9 to 10. But notice the theological 
basis for Christian ethics in verses 11 to 15. In other words, 
those who fear the Lord will function as those who fear the 
Lord. Those saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ are those 
who will actually obey what the Apostle Paul says in this section. Notice verse 11. for the grace 
of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching 
us that denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live 
soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age, looking for 
the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and 
Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us, that he might 
redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for himself his 
own special people, zealous for good works. So, let's just work 
backwards for just a moment. If indeed Christ gave himself 
for you, mothers, that he might redeem you from every lawless 
deed and purify for himself his own special people, zealous for 
good works, you see, that's the grace that enables you to comply 
with what is enjoined upon you in verses 4 and 5. Now, you mothers 
know I've preached a lot of sermons on this particular subject over 
my 20 years here. A friend of mine recently made 
an interesting observation. He's not in our church, so don't 
try to figure out who it was who said such a thing. But he 
says, you know, in our churches on Mother's Day, mothers are 
generally encouraged by the message that is given. And I'm not here 
to discourage you. I'm not here to cast you down. 
But he says mothers are usually encouraged, and yet on Father's 
Day, the men are hammered. Women are extolled and their 
virtues displayed and how wonderful you are. He didn't elaborate 
like this, but I think I see the thought process. And then 
when we get to Father's Day, you wretches need to do this, 
that, and the other. So if you detect, ladies, this 
morning, a bit more admonition than typical, I think my brother 
was right in that observation. We ought not to expect that a 
saved Christian woman who is called to be a mother is necessarily 
doing everything perfectly, any more than we ought to suspect 
that a saved Christian man who is called to be a father is doing 
everything perfectly. So a bit of admonition, or a 
bit of exhortation, or a bit of perhaps warning, or calling 
one to consider the reality that we find in Scripture may not 
be out of line, and hopefully it will be of benefit to you 
as you consider this situation. So in terms of her spiritual 
or condition before God, she is saved by grace. As well, she 
walks with the Lord. The woman who fears the Lord 
is one who walks with the Lord. And this is important. I mean, 
anything that we are called to do in service to God demands 
that we are living in service to God. We ought to be close 
to the Lord in order to serve the Lord. We ought to be close 
to God in order to honor God. We ought to be close to God to 
draw the resources or to draw off of him the resources necessary 
to engage in in the particular things he calls us to. It's not 
just men who need to study theology. It's not just men who need to 
study the Bible. It's not just men who should 
show up on Wednesday night as we study the kings of Israel. 
It's not just men who should show up on Saturday morning as 
we study Louis Burckhoff. It's not just men who need to 
walk with the Lord. Ladies, you need to walk with 
the Lord, and if in your walk with the Lord one of the particular 
activities you are called upon is to communicate the word of 
the Lord to your children, don't do it heretically. Husbands, 
you ought to have a vested interest in the fact that your wife can 
explain justification by faith. Hopefully she's not of the school 
of Pelagius. Hopefully she is not a heretic. 
Hopefully she is not catechizing your children on just be good 
little boys and girls and God will accept you into his heart 
or into his kingdom. Women, you need to get busy and 
study the scriptures. You need to study theology. You need to understand that system 
of Christian faith because your task is to educate your children. A woman once approached D.L. 
Moody and said, Dr. Moody, or Pastor Moody, I want 
to preach the gospel. And Moody's response was golden. He says, do you have children 
at home? She said, yes, eight. He said, then go home and preach 
the gospel. I don't care if Beth Moore's 
out there funneling her big face into every church and they're 
soaking it in. Your responsibility as women 
under God is to teach those little ones the fear of the Lord. You 
cannot do that apart from God's grace. You cannot do that apart 
from God himself. So this woman fears the Lord, 
which obviously means that she is a benefactor of his grace. 
It was grace that taught my heart to fear, and she walks with the 
Lord. She cultivates this relationship. She does read broadly and widely, 
and I'm not saying all you can ever read is Birkhoff, but could 
you think about including something like that? Read the Confession 
of Faith. Know the difference between justification 
and sanctification. Don't undo in your private setting 
what our job is in the public place. We're trying to teach 
our kids the difference between, or the relationship between, 
but the differences between justification and sanctification. Don't be 
a Roman Catholic at home, conflate the two, and cause them to be 
utterly confused about the whole scenario. Now, if that line confused 
you, then you need to study. If that line confused you, then 
you're not paying attention because we emphasize that reality a lot. Justification is a one-time act 
by God wherein He pardons all our sins and accepts us as righteous 
in His sight only for the righteousness of Christ imputed to us and received 
by faith alone. Those justified now will pursue 
holiness. They will pursue what's called 
sanctification. We're not saved by a combination 
of the two. We're saved because of the doing 
and the dying and the rising of the Lord Jesus and the justification 
that comes as a result of that. So don't pay pies or be papistical 
with your kids and mess up their thought process on this whole 
subject. Ladies. I mean this in the most 
encouraging way I can say. You need to know theology. You 
need to know the Bible. And as I will hammer the men 
on Father's Day, it's unconscionable that we don't. We are so plugged 
into social media. We are so on Facebook and so 
on Instagram and so on whatever online game or or allurement 
is out there, we don't have time to study a little bit of theology? 
I would suggest, based on what's happening in terms of social 
media, we've got nothing but time. And to waste it on those 
particular avenues is to waste golden opportunities to take 
and embrace the calling given us by God, to take these little 
ones and raise them up in the fear and admonition of God Most 
High. I'm not suggesting you zero out 
everything and delete all your accounts, though that might not 
be a bad idea for some of you, but watch and pray and consider. If you cannot define the doctrine 
of justification, but you know everything that's going on with 
everybody in the church in terms of their status, you've got problems. You've got issues. And repentance 
might be the order of the day. Her condition before God is that 
she's saved by grace and she walks with the Lord. Secondly, 
her influence over her children. I've already told you, the fifth 
commandment highlights the reality that this lady has influence 
over her children. as well in the book of Leviticus 
in 19.3. You want warrant for a Mother's 
Day sermon on the Sabbath day? Leviticus 19.3. Every one of 
you shall revere his mother and his father and keep my Sabbaths. I am the Lord your God. We see her influence over her 
children enjoined in the law itself, but also as exemplified 
or rather amplified, which the book of Proverbs essentially 
is, it is the exposition and application of God's law to daily 
life. Notice in Proverbs chapter 1, 
just to spot the influence of a godly woman or a godly mother 
over her children. Proverbs 1 in verse 8, my son, 
hear the instruction of your father and do not forsake the 
law of your mother. What's that imply? The mother 
is commanding her children. She's not begging them. She's not bribing them. She is commanding them. And as I thought through just 
the impact we as fathers and mothers can have in our generation, 
I mean, if you look out there, the bar has dropped, right? I think if we can just successfully 
teach our kids to walk and chew gum at the same time, they'll 
probably be the most successful beings on the face of the earth. 
I saw a video this week of a woman in a university setting. She 
saw a sign, and this isn't pro, anti, it's just an observation. Somebody had a pro-Donald Trump 
sign, and this grown woman screamed at the sight of it, carried on 
like an absolute mad woman. So, brethren, to raise up children 
that make a mark on society today, it's probably not unattainable. If our spawn just don't scream 
and yell when they see a sign, praise God, from whom all blessings 
flow. Do you know why people carry 
on that way? It's because their parents didn't 
command them. They bribed them. They begged 
them. They didn't assert their God-given 
authority. You think there's any sort of 
haphazardness to the Decalogue, the 10 Commandments of God? You've 
got our duties toward God, Commandments 1 to 4, duties toward man, Commandments 
5 to 10. Five is the linchpin. Five is 
sort of the turning point. In fact, there have been those 
in the history of the church that put the fifth word with 
the first table. It indicates God's authority 
when He stations parents in the home, not to bribe their children, 
not to beg their children, but to command their children. It is a loathsome thing to see 
parents out there actually bribing kids to do what the kids should 
do. And this is, again, this is indicative 
of society all around us. When you see these whiners in 
a university setting, there's a whole host of reasons why it's 
ended up this way, but never forget the parents. If you produce 
rotten kids, we're going to have a rotten society. Now, I know 
God's good and God saves rotten kids and He causes their hearts 
to fear and all of that. I get that. But in terms of the 
basic approach that we find worked out in the book of Proverbs, 
what you put into it is what you will get out of it. Notice 
Proverbs 6 in verse 20. My son, keep your father's command 
and do not forsake the law of your mother. Bind them continually 
upon your heart, tie them around your neck. When you roam, they 
will lead you. When you sleep, they will keep 
you. And when you awake, they will speak with you, for the 
commandment is a lamp and the law a light, reproofs of instruction 
and the way of life to keep you from the evil woman, from the 
flattering tongue of a seductress. Ladies, instruct your sons in 
a way that is pleasing to the Lord so that he will be kept 
from this evil woman. And then, of course, in Proverbs 
chapter 31, our very passage, notice in verse 1, prior to the 
description of this virtuous woman, Proverbs 31.1, the words 
of King Lenuel, the utterance which his mother taught him. It's a beautiful thing that a 
mother influenced a king. It's a beautiful thing that a 
mother exercised her God-given role over her king son so that 
he would function in a way that was pleasing. The third thing 
we ought, before we leave this influence over her children, 
let's listen to C.H. Spurgeon. He says, fathers and 
mothers are the most natural agents for God to use in the 
salvation of their children. Isn't the church blamed all the 
time when children leave the church? They get to 15, 16, 17, 
18, and they leave, they apostatize. The church is typically blamed, 
and I think we ought to share some of that. We ought to make 
sure we're going after the hearts of young people. We're preaching 
in such a way that we're explaining the truth of the gospel. We're 
explaining justification. We're explaining sanctification. 
Brethren, it's the parents that exercise that first level of 
responsibility. I think we typically fall into, 
you know, Adamic mode. The woman who now has given me, 
she gave to me to eat. The church that you put me in 
messed my kids up. Again, churches mess kids up. I'm not here to debate that. 
But brethren, as the first line of defense, it is your primary 
responsibility to deal with your kids. We don't like when the 
state wants to raise our children, do we? I hope we don't. Why should we try to farm it 
out to the church? It's the parents that should 
be the ones involved in their kids' lives. They should love 
you a whole lot more than they love me. Not saying kids don't 
love me, hate me, throw things at me, but you should be the 
best people in their lives. You're God's means of influence 
over them for the long haul. You're God's means of influence 
over them for the bulk of the week. They come to Sunday school, 
perhaps, and they're in church service in the morning and church 
service in the evening. We get them, what, three, four, 
five hours out of the week? You've got the rest of the time. So Spurgeon is not off the mark 
here. Fathers and mothers are the most 
natural agents for God to use in the salvation of their children. 
I am sure that in my early youth, no teaching made such an impression 
upon my mind as the instruction of my mother. Neither can I conceive 
that to any child there can be one who will have such influence 
over the young heart as the mother who has so tenderly cared for 
her offspring. I don't think he indicates it 
here, but there's another place where Spurgeon said his own mother 
would plead with the kids at family worship such and would 
declare, had declared to them, if you end up cast off on the 
day of judgment, I will side with God himself because my hands 
are clean of your blood. I have not shrunk back from declaring 
to you the whole counsel of God and pleading with you in earnest 
to be reconciled unto God through Jesus Christ. If you are finally 
lost and finally damned, I will side with God on that day." Think 
about it. This woman raised a Spurgeon. 
That's incredible, isn't it? A man, he goes on to say, a man 
with a soul so dead as not to be moved by the sacred name of 
mother is creation's blot. Never could it be possible for 
any man to estimate what he owes to a godly mother. How can I 
ever forget her tearful eye when she warned me to escape from 
the wrath to come? I thought her lip eloquent. Others 
might not think so, but they certainly were eloquent to me. 
How can I ever forget when she bowed her knee and with her arms 
about my neck prayed, oh, that my son might live before thee? It's beautiful, isn't it? You can never underestimate the 
influence of godly motherhood on the lives under their charge. 
I've quoted this before, it bears repetition. And again, politically, 
just not what I'm on about. But when asked what could be 
done to restore the prestige of France, Napoleon replied, 
give us better mothers. North America looking like that 
today? Again, you see these teenagers 
and these young adults, brethren, they just needed to be spanked 
when they were kids. What's wrong with society? The 
economists and the social sort of engineers are all trying to 
figure out what's wrong. They should have been spanked 
at Walmart or after their trip to Walmart when they flipped 
out because they couldn't have something. I mean, it really isn't much 
more difficult than that. I'm sure there's other factors. 
You know, don't go home today and say, well, you know, just 
spank kids and everything will be hunky-dory. No, but if you 
don't spank kids, things are probably not going to be hunky-dory. 
Thirdly, her authority over her children. We've referred to the 
fifth word. Exodus 20, verse 12, Ephesians 6, verses 1 and 
2. One famous or popular Bible dictionary says, honoring both 
parents is at the heart of the Ten Commandments. And the mother 
comes first in the command to respect, literally, fear them 
as part of national holiness. That passage I read in Leviticus 
19.3. Both father and mother are to 
be heeded and obeyed. This is absolutely crucial that 
we underscore this and understand this because especially at times, 
young teenage boys say, well, you're not my dad or dad's not 
here. Fathers, you need to instruct 
your children that in your absence, the Queen's word is to be received, 
revered and feared and in your presence as well. equal authority 
in terms of bringing up these little ones. Dumas, in his book 
on the Ten Commandments, says, mentioning the mother is no afterthought, 
for she deserves to be treated with as much respect as the father. Practice demonstrates that children 
can misuse the fact that a mother's physical condition often renders 
her less able to enforce her word. She is physically the weaker 
parent. But the Fifth Commandment clearly 
requires respect for both father and mother. Children must honor 
their mother even when she is physically and physiologically 
declining. Do not despise your mother when 
she is old, Proverbs 23, 22. The Bible presents a relationship 
of authority between husband and wife where the husband takes 
the lead, but children must show equal honor to both mother and 
father. You see, her condition before 
God is that she's saved by grace and walks with the Lord. Her 
influence over her children is great in that the Lord has given 
parents to children to be a primary means of influence. Her authority 
over her children is given you in the fifth word, in the fifth 
commandment, and demonstrated and exemplified all throughout 
the book of Proverbs. Let's look finally at her responsibility 
toward her children And certainly there's probably a plethora of 
other things, but I've got four specifics that we will close 
on here this morning. Terms of exposition, then I have 
some concluding admonitions, gentle, kind, gracious, loving, 
but nevertheless, some admonitions or exhortations. In the first 
place, your responsibility is to instruct your children. Not 
in quantum physics, though if that's where you happen to be 
gifted, by all means, teach them quantum physics, but the law 
and the gospel. the law and the gospel, teach 
them the truth as it is in Jesus, teach them the truth of God's 
holy word, teach them what scripture says, and in order to do that, 
you need to know what scripture says. Those little ones are looking 
to be led, they're looking to be taught, they're looking to 
be influenced, they're looking to be guided, shaped, molded, 
and helped. This idea that, you know, just 
let them go and express themselves. No! Absolutely not. Do not let them go and express 
themselves. They'll end up screaming on a 
public campus when they see a Donald Trump sign. You don't want that 
for your kid. You want to restrain them. You 
want to guard them. You want to help them. You want 
to do like that woman in Proverbs chapter 6. Give that young man 
such commands that he will be kept from the evil woman. Don't 
deliver him up to her vicious hand. You need to know the law 
and the gospel and you need to instruct your children. Secondly, 
you need to set an example for your children. Look at Proverbs 
22.6. Proverbs 22.6, a very famous passage. one that bears exposition all 
on its own. Just gonna read it and then make 
a comment or rather read a comment from Bridges in his commentary 
on Proverbs. Proverbs 22.6, train up a child 
in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart 
from it. So certainly that touches on 
the first point to instruct your children but secondly to set 
an example for your children. Listen to Bridges who I highly 
commend. If you have the opportunity to 
purchase Charles Bridges' commentary on Proverbs, He deals beautifully 
with all the passages that deal with child rearing. If you're 
a new parent here this morning, you've got young children, or 
you're an older parent and you've got older children, and you need 
a bit of a boost in the arm or some encouragement, pick up Proverbs 
by Charles Bridges and read the sections dealing with child rearing. 
It's brilliant. Notice what he says specifically 
with reference to setting an example. He says the mere talk 
to a child about religion without bringing it to bear upon his 
loose habits and self-willed tempers is utterly ineffective. None of us lives to himself alone. 
We're all spreading around us an influence, whether for good 
or for evil. Here, therefore, in our families lies the responsibility 
of Christian consistency. If the child hears of godliness 
and sees but wickedness, this is bringing him bread with one 
hand and poison with the other, beckoning with the hand to heaven 
and at the same time taking him by the hand and leading him in 
the way of destruction. He says, who would receive even 
the choicest food from a leprous hand? Well, what are you saying 
there? Who would receive even the choicest 
food from a leprous hand? You probably wouldn't. Name your 
favorite food. If a diseased hand was holding 
it out to your lips, you'd probably say, no, I think I'll pass. And 
yet, this is what it is to instruct with no example. This is what 
it is to try and teach them the law and the gospel, but not being 
one who lives as one conquered by that gospel. He says, a child 
learns more by the eye than by the ear. Imitation is a far more 
powerful principle than memory. A well-trained child gladly looks 
to his parents' godliness as his model picture to copy after. A wayward child eagerly seeks 
for the excuse of his own delinquency, and this discovery in parental 
example will harden him in infidelity and ungodliness." That last bit's 
very important. Child's going to look to a good 
example. When he sees the good example 
exemplified by his father and mother and he follows that, it's 
a good thing. It's a win-win. But if this child can look at 
his parents as a reason for his own wretchedness and his own 
sinfulness, and he's able to rise up and say something to 
the effect, well, this is what I always saw in my home, he's 
still guilty to be sure, but it certainly does not fare well 
for the mother and for the father. You see, instruction and example. Thirdly, to discipline her children. To discipline her children. I 
think we've sufficiently covered this. We don't bribe them, we 
don't beg them. We deal with them with the authority 
God's given us. Now be judicious here. Be wise 
in the application of scripture here. We live in a day and age, 
a society that is contrary to the word of God. Let's give you 
a little bit of a personal autobiographical sketch. When my wife and I were 
converted, we were brought to the Savior by God's grace in 
an obviously miraculous way. We didn't wake up one day and 
say, hey, I've decided to follow Jesus. No, it was a conquered 
by sovereign grace sort of thing. Well, not long after that, we 
started to learn about how to bring up children, because before 
being Christians, we just didn't even think about such things. 
And so I had a faithful mentor, a faithful brother, a faithful 
pastor, a faithful friend who taught us about corporal punishment, 
that implementation of physical punishment to the kids. My mother 
got wind of this and said, how dare you beat your kids? And when she said that, brethren, 
it knocked me back a few feet and I thought, wow, man, that's 
right. And I had to regroup and think, no, God's word says to. 
Now, the scripture doesn't say beat your kids. It talks about, 
well, actually some passages do, but it assumes that you're 
bright enough to understand that doesn't mean physically abuse 
them. But it was interesting, because I asked my mom, what 
happened when you were a kid and you got out of line? She 
said, we got belted. Just matter of factly, we got belted. I said, 
is there any correlation between the fact that in your day and 
age, the biggest crimes at school were running in the hall, chewing 
gum, talking in class? What are the biggest crimes in 
high school today? I'd be afraid to walk onto a 
campus. We need metal detectors to get into a public school campus. I said, Mom, do you see any correlation 
between what you got as a child, the way things were when you 
were a kid, and the way things are now? She got it, by the grace 
of God. Doesn't take rocket science or 
an engineering degree to get that correlation, so be judicious. We live in an anti-Christian 
sort of a society that is contrary to the word of God, so be judicious, 
be wise, be righteous. Child abuse is never authorized 
in the scriptures. If any of you men or women are 
beating your children in a way that's ungodly, repent, forsake 
it, stop. God says no. But with reference 
to biblical discipline, the scriptures are clear in a whole host of 
ways, a whole host of instances. So be judicious. If you need 
to ask questions, you can talk to Pastor Porter, you can talk 
to me. Not that we're the gurus or the Bill Gothards of the Reformed 
Baptism, we're not that. But brethren, this is something 
we need to apply, but we need to be judicious, we need to be 
wise, we need to be cunning as serpents, we need to be harmless 
as doves in our society, that we mustn't ever resist those 
things that God enjoins for us. And it's not just corporal, it's 
reproof. Reproof. There are times it's 
the best thing in the world to tell your kids no. It's the best 
thing in the world to let them know that life is tough. There 
are issues, there are problems. You can't always just be unbridled 
and undisciplined and lacking self-control. Best thing you 
can do is to get a grip on them while they're young. Somewhere 
in Bridges, one of the comments, he said, the father said, if 
you haven't broken the child's will by the age of two, you lost 
him. That's a bit of a hardcore statement, brethren. Is that 
what the patristics believed? Praise God we're not raising 
kids back in those days, right? Because our kids are eight and 
they're still going nuts if they don't get a Snickers when we 
go to Walmart. What would they suggest with 
reference to us? The point is, is that they're 
born in Adam. There is this idea that that 
little precious babe wrapped in swaddling cloths is a neutral 
being. Philosophy, this is called a 
tabula rasa, like their heart's a blank stone or a blank slate 
and that, you know, it's up to us to put everything on it. That's 
not what's taught in scripture. We're in Adam. The wicked go 
estranged from the womb, speaking lies as soon as they are born. 
That wasn't John Calvin who said that. It wasn't Augustine who 
said that. It wasn't Jim Butler who said 
that. It was the sweet psalmist of Israel in Psalm 58, verse 
3. The wicked go estranged from 
the womb, speaking lies as soon as they are born. That self-same 
sweet psalmist of Israel, typically, of course, Christ is the sweet 
psalmist of Israel, but David functioning typically concerning 
his own native depravity, traces it back to his conception. In 
sin did my mother conceive me. David's not saying the conjugal 
act between my father and mother was a sinful thing, a necessary 
evil. No, David said as soon as David 
is, he was a sinner. They're not blank slates, brethren. 
If you let them express themselves in their crib or in their nursery, 
don't be surprised when they express themselves at age 18 
or 20 or 25 in a way that is less than savory. So you need to instruct, set 
example, discipline, and love. Love the children. This is what 
Paul tells Titus in that text we read in Titus 2. Now, you 
might suggest or you might ask, well, why does a woman need to 
be told to love her kids? Because this is a godless, wretched 
age, isn't it? It's a terrible age. Abortion is certainly an indication 
that not all mothers love their children. There are horrific 
acts that are occurring on children by mothers. You need to love 
them. You need to nurture them. You 
need to care for them. That they admonish the young 
women to love their husbands, to love their children. See, 
Paul thought, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, it was necessary 
to remind young women to love their children. You know, I wonder 
if we do duties at times, or we engage in particular activities, 
and we forget love. to think about that as a pastor, 
as a preacher. Am I doing this because I love 
the brethren or just to fulfill a particular requirement? Are 
we being faithful fathers and faithful mothers to fulfill a 
requirement? Is it done in the orbit of love? 
I was telling somebody recently with reference to preaching, 
your people will forgive a bad sermon or two if they know that 
you love them. It's the same thing with parenting. 
You're gonna mess up as parents, but if your kids know you love 
them, The kids know that you even did a terrible thing, but 
in the grand scheme of things, it's because you love them. There'll 
be forgiveness there. You need to function in the orbit 
of Christian love. That is crucial with reference 
to child rearing. So, in conclusion, I want to 
bring out a few thoughts by way of application and then we'll 
close. In the first place, there is a need for such women as described 
here in Proverbs 31. Martin Luther said, The greatest gift of God. Now 
certainly Luther would assume that the greatest gift of God 
is salvation by grace through faith in Jesus. But he's speaking 
in terms of creature, gift that is created. The greatest gift 
of God is a pious, amiable spouse who fears God, loves his house, 
and with whom one can live in perfect confidence. Bruce Waltke 
in his commentary on the Proverbs. It's interesting, if you go back 
to chapter 31, specifically at verse 10, it's all framed in 
the form of a question. Who can find a virtuous wife? 
And he goes on to explain such a woman. Who can find this kind 
of a woman? Waltke says the rhetorical question, 
who can find, aims to awaken within the audience the desire 
to find such a wife or to be like her. And Matthew Henry, 
in his beautiful way, says the description of the virtuous woman 
is designed to show what wives the women should make and what 
wives the men should choose. I love that emphasis. All of 
you young ladies here that perhaps are not married and perhaps having 
children at this particular time, this is the kind of woman you 
ought to be. This is the kind of woman you should pursue to 
be or try to be. If you are presently a mother 
and you have children and you are in the task, this ought to 
be your goal. If you've made a mess of it, 
if you have sinned, if you have violated God's law, confess it, 
forsake it, and you will find mercy. It's a blessed promise 
from Proverbs 28, 13. Whoever covers his transgression 
will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes it will 
find mercy. You've got 1 John 1.9. You might 
go home today and say, kids, I've been a wretched mother. 
Cast yourself upon the mercy of God in Christ, 1 John 1.9. 
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive 
us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Don't continue 
to perpetuate the misery Oh, I'm just so wicked, I'm just 
so evil. But the God of heaven and earth says he'll forgive 
you. Why? You hear this with people sometimes. 
Rebecca and I are reading a very excellent little book right now, 
and the author points out, you'll meet people that say, I'm so 
sinful, I can't forgive myself. Are you better than God? Because 
God can forgive you. Are you more holy and pure than 
God? Because God forgives you. Imagine 
the gall of somebody who actually believes the Bible saying, I 
know that God exercises forgiveness and mercy and grace and cleanses 
me in the blood of Christ, but I can't forgive myself. Why? God's much better than you are 
and he forgave you, so perhaps you ought to follow suit. But 
young man, this is the kind of woman you ought to pursue. This is the kind of woman that 
you ought to pursue, the kind of woman who fears God, the kind 
of woman who glorifies God, the kind of woman who serves God. 
This is what you ought to be praying for because this is a 
gift from Yahweh. Proverbs 19.14. I love the way 
the author states it. Proverbs 19.14. Houses and riches are an inheritance 
from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord. Brethren, if 
you have such this morning, when you go home, praise God for her. Praise her as well. You say, well, I don't want to 
go puff her up. You know what the Bible says 
to those who won't ever puff their wives up because somehow 
that's godly? You're a nabal. You're a fool. What does the husband in Proverbs 
31 say to his wife? I have a great deal of respect 
for you, and I'd love to compliment you, but I don't want you to 
get proud. Many daughters have done well, but you excel them 
all. Husbands, if you don't encourage 
your wives, especially if they're surrounded by nonstop chatterboxes 
all day long, you got problems, man. Motherhood's tough. Motherhood is tough. Ask most 
men to watch the little kids for, you know, an hour. They're 
chomping at the bit to go back to work. I'd rather move bales 
of hay. I'd rather try to leap tall buildings 
in a single bound. I'd rather dig a hole with a 
spoon and be surrounded by that for an hour. I'm not trying to 
be rude, brethren, but God has temperamentally fitted it in 
such a way that women just seem to excel in patience. Patience. Husbands, praise your wives if 
you've been given such a gift. That brings us to our second 
point in terms of application, the encouragement given to such 
a woman from her husband, her husband also, and he praises 
her. Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. Men, do you love your wife in 
such a way that you encourage her with your words? Do you love 
your wife in such a way that you build her up? That's the 
whole point in Ephesians 4. We oftentimes take Ephesians 
4 and say, well, you can't say these four-letter words. When 
Paul's talking about let no corrupt word proceed from your mouth, 
certainly you're not supposed to go out and cuss. But the idea 
is to let those words proceed from your mouth that are good 
for necessary edification, words that up-build, words that encourage, 
words that help. If your wife is doing the work 
of mothering children and she's doing a decent job of it, tell 
her as well from her children. Verse 28a in Proverbs 31, her 
children rise up and call her blessed. It ought not to be just 
one Sunday in May that you thank your mom for the stuff that she 
does. You have no idea for the stuff 
that she does. Thank her, praise her, say such 
kind things to her, call her blessed. As well, there's encouragement 
from her community, at least in a covenanted community, so 
it ought to be the case in the life and the context of the church. 
Let her own works praise her in the gates. The gates is where 
the city's business was conducted. And this woman's man had such 
a woman that she was praised in the gates. Now thirdly, and 
this brings us to the finally, as I mentioned earlier, mothers 
are often encouraged on Mother's Day, fathers are often hammered 
on Father's Day. I want to gently suggest a few 
things for you ladies. First, you must constantly maintain 
dependence upon God, the word and prayer, both privately and 
publicly. I know it's tough at times to 
come to church on Sunday when you've had a really busy week. 
It's amazing to me how, and I'm not trying to make this sound 
belittle it, all of us have demands on our time, don't we? You get 
the odd one or two, I'm just so tired I couldn't come to church. 
Now, I get that. I mean, some of these guys are 
machines that work, but for the most part, brethren, life is 
busy. Life is hard. You know, we don't 
have bluebirds attending us and clothing us and, you know, putting 
on our makeups and powdering our faces and, you know, bringing 
us into the public place. It takes some effort. Brethren, 
sisters, specifically, you cannot do your job unless you are living 
in vital dependence upon God. And that dependence is expressed 
through prayer and through scripture. Yes, privately, but as well in 
the public place of worship. A woman who fears the Lord. Secondly, 
you must not forsake God's word in child-rearing. God calls the 
shots regarding your children. God owns your children, not the 
civil state, not the community. You've heard the old adage, it 
takes a community to raise a child. No, it takes obedience by faithful 
parents to God to raise a child. Or as Ken Harms would say, rear 
a child. Cattle are raised, you rear children. You get my gist. Thirdly, you 
must realize that your task is difficult. Preaching to the choir 
now, ladies, aren't I? Oftentimes thankless and mostly 
underappreciated by just about everyone. Like I said, I'm intimately 
connected to at least one mother in this place. I've seen what 
goes on. I used to work shift work, so 
I was home during the days because I worked all night, so I kind 
of saw what was involved in motherhood. And like I said, brethren, given 
the opportunity of being a full-time mother or digging holes with 
a spoon, I'll choose the latter typically. It's oftentimes thankless, oftentimes 
underappreciated. Fourthly, you must persevere 
in your calling and realize that the calling you have under God 
is a full-time, multifaceted calling that is of the utmost 
importance. Walter Chantry had a little booklet 
called The High Calling of Motherhood. You know, it's almost to the 
point in our society where some ladies are embarrassed to say, 
stay at home with the children. So we don't want to be judged 
by those around us. That's all you do? Again, I'd 
rather dig a hole with a spoon than that's all I did. Ladies, 
don't be embarrassed to embrace your God-given calling of rearing 
children unto the Lord. It doesn't matter what the pagans 
say. It doesn't matter what the heathens 
say. They're at active enmity to God. Why does it matter that 
they think you're wasting your life taking care of those kids? 
There's no higher calling on this earth than taking care of 
those kids. I think Society, in many ways, 
depends upon it. You must labor, fifthly, to understand 
God's truth, the law of the gospel, and you must continually set 
the truth before your children. And sixthly, here's, it's gonna 
get a little personal, you must guard against laziness. It is intriguing, in chapter 
31, specifically at verse 27, she watches over the ways of 
her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. You cannot be lazy and an effective 
mother. Now, I certainly realize we all 
have our off days. We all have our days that are 
perhaps not as productive as other days. For the most part, 
we're chugging along, we're doing well, our output is high, and 
then we get hit with a Thursday or a Friday where it just seems 
like it's terrible, especially if we have that tendency to be 
a gloomy goss, and we don't get that stuff done. I get that. There's an exception to every 
rule. But ladies, if social media is gobbling up more of your time 
than your little ones, there's a problem. If anything is gobbling 
up more of your time than your little ones, there's a problem. Child rearing takes involvement. You've heard the adage, but we 
spend quality time. Kids need quantity time. Just 
hang out, be together. Same with husbands or fathers. 
Yeah, I only spend 14 minutes a week with them, but we make 
it count. Take them out when you paint 
the fence. Take them out when you dig that 
hole with the spoon. Take them out. Quantity is necessary 
for the task of faithfully rearing children unto God. Bring them 
up, Paul says, in the training and admonition of the Lord. That's 
not done in 14 minutes a week. In many respects, my dear sisters 
in Christ, when you had babies, you basically gave up your life, 
at least for a period of time. Don't whine about it, don't snivel 
about it, don't grumble about it, don't complain. You had the 
desire to engage in the privilege of motherhood, exercise the responsibility 
to bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Don't 
just farm them out to devices. Don't farm them out to something 
else other than you. Spend the time. They need your 
instruction. They need your example. They 
certainly need your discipline, if society is any testimony around 
us. And they need your love. Certainly have quality time, 
but it ought to be in the context of quantity time. Spend time 
with your kids. I've mused with my kids because 
of the way that my work schedule was. We were always together. 
I mean, it was a nice shift to go to work at 10 at night and 
come home at 7 in the morning. I mean, it wasn't nice because 
it takes years off your life and you're a grumpy bear every 
time you get out of bed. But you just, by necessity, were 
with your kids. That was a blessing in God's 
providence. They may not have thought so, 
because I was a grumpy bear most of the time. But they can say, 
at least we had the quantity. Brothers, if you are that busy 
or working that much, you've got to make time for kids. They're not going to raise themselves. 
Wouldn't it be nice if you just pop them out and set them on 
the shelf and in 18 years they were just faithful, decent human 
beings that went out and made money and paid their taxes? It 
doesn't work that way. You have to get down and dirty 
in the midst of it and rear them unto Jesus. So guard, my dear 
sisters, against laziness. Identify those things that will 
chomp up your time and take you from the task at hand. And I 
would suggest, finally, you must continually look to the gospel 
of the Lord Jesus Christ. Parenting is not for novices. Parenting is not for beginners. 
Parenting demands people that understand the truth as it is 
in Jesus. Those who do apply daily to the 
blood of the Lord Jesus Christ. And those who will indeed humble 
themselves, not only before God, but before their children. Parents, 
well, we don't want to show any weakness. No, but you want to 
communicate mercy. You want to communicate what 
it is to ask for forgiveness. You want to communicate what 
it is to confess sins. You want to let them see that 
you are not a perfect specimen of a human being, and you stand 
as dependent upon the grace of God in Christ Jesus as you are 
pressing upon them. Be faithful, be diligent, be 
earnest, but above all, be close to Jesus. Well, let us pray. Our Father in heaven, we thank 
you for your word. We thank you for the mothers 
and the grandmothers in our church. We pray that this would have 
been an encouragement to them, a challenge to them. I pray for 
them, God, that daily they would know supplies of grace from on 
high and strive to be faithful to their high calling. Bless 
the children and the young people in this congregation. We do long 
to see them close with Christ at an early age. Our hearts desire 
that they would be brought up in the training and admonition 
of the Lord. Our hearts desire that they would call upon the 
Lord Jesus Christ for salvation. Grant us grace in this endeavor. Grant us grace to bring up children 
that are pleasing in the sight of a great and holy God. Go with 
us now, we pray, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. We'll 
close with a brief time of meditation.