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Proverbs 31, the Christian mother 
is our focus tonight. If you're not a mother, there 
still might be something in this message for you. In fact, I'm 
convinced what Matthew Henry says concerning this description 
of the virtuous woman. He says, it is designed to show 
what wives the women should make and what wives the men should 
choose. Bruce Waltke says, the rhetorical 
question, who can find, aims to awaken within the audience 
to desire to find such a wife or to be like her. I'll begin 
reading in Proverbs 31 at verse 10. Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above Ruby's. The heart of her husband safely 
trusts her, so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good 
and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks wool and 
flax and willingly works with her hands. She is like the merchant 
ships. She brings her food from afar. 
She also rises while it is yet night and provides food for her 
household and a portion for her maidservants. She considers a 
field and buys it. From her profits, she plants 
a vineyard. She girds herself with strength and strengthens 
her arms. She perceives that her merchandise 
is good, and her lamp does not go out by night. She stretches 
out her hands to the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle. 
She extends her hand to the poor. Yes, she reaches out her hands 
to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for 
her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet. She 
makes tapestry for herself. Her clothing is fine linen and 
purple. Her husband is known in the gates, 
when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen 
garments and sells them and supplies sashes for the merchants. Strength 
and honor are her clothing. She shall rejoice in time to 
come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is 
the law of kindness." That's hesed, that strong, covenantal 
faithfulness, that love. Verse 27, she watches over the 
ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 
Her children rise up and call her blessed, her husband also, 
and he praises her. Many daughters have done well, 
but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty 
is passing, but a woman who fears Yahweh, she shall be praised. 
Give her of the fruit of her hands and let her own works praise 
her in the gates. Amen. Well, let us pray. Father, 
we ask that you would guide us now by your Holy Spirit. We ask 
that this would be an encouragement to the ladies in the trenches 
serving in this capacity. Give us grace, Father, to honor 
our wives as is established here in such a passage, and as children 
may we honor our mothers, and may we glorify You, God, in the 
way that we treat one another, the way that we show gratitude 
and thankfulness and those things which are fitting, not just for 
redeemed people but for creatures. For God, you are good, and you 
have given the family structure for good, and we pray that you 
would just help us to see its necessity, to see its beauty, 
to see how it does reflect the kindness and the goodness and 
the glory and the majesty of God Most High. We ask these things 
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. Well, there are several 
things that are spoken of concerning this woman in this passage. As 
I said, our focus primarily will be on her as mother. But note 
just by way of passing, she is diligent. If you notice in verse 
13 and following. You cannot come out of Proverbs 
31 and conclude that the woman that God says is a virtuous woman 
or a virtuous wife is lazy. She is just the opposite. We 
see as well, and we'll look at this further in just a moment, 
she is spiritual. She is self-controlled. She is 
trustworthy. She does good for her husband. 
A couple of interesting facts concerning this particular proverb 
in terms of its literary setting. Proverbs 31, 10 to 31 is an alphabetic 
acrostic. That means that each of the verses 
follow the Hebrew alphabet. It begins with Aleph, or A, and 
then it goes to B, and then to G, and all the way through the 
alphabet. It's really a poetic and a literary 
masterpiece. As well, in the Hebrew canon, 
what we find is a different order for the Old Testament books. 
It's the same books. What we have in our Protestant 
canon in the Old Testament is the same thing that the Jews 
have in their Hebrew canon, but there is a different ordering. 
And after the book of Proverbs comes the book of Ruth, and Ruth 
in many ways illustrates what is given to us in this description 
of a virtuous wife. In fact, this is the statement 
or the exclamation concerning Ruth specifically in chapter 
3, verse 11, that she is virtuous. She's a woman of valor. She is 
this kind of a person. So, I think in many respects 
that Hebrew canon does serve to help us flesh out what this 
Proverbs 31 woman looks like in the life of Ruth. Well, as 
I said, I want to look specifically at the Christian mother under 
four considerations. First, her spiritual condition. 
Secondly, her influence. Thirdly, her authority. And then 
fourthly, her responsibility. In the first place, note her 
spiritual condition, dropping down to verse 30b. But a woman who fears Yahweh, 
she shall be praised. This is a woman who has been 
saved by the grace of God. For we know in the Scripture 
that a person in Adam, including women, including mothers, including 
wives, including husbands and fathers and whoever they may 
be, a person outside of Christ who is in Adam does not fear 
God. In fact, that's how Paul summarizes 
his description of the wicked in Romans chapter 3. He ends 
that sort of catena of Bible verses to underscore the depravity 
of man by saying or describing in Romans 3.18 that there is 
no fear of God before their eyes. So when we come to this description 
of this virtuous woman, the fact that she fears Yahweh, the fact 
that she is a God-fearer, underscores the reality that she is saved 
by grace. The work of God is manifest in 
our heart. The language is similar to what 
we find in a promise of the New Covenant in Jeremiah, the prophet, 
in Jeremiah 32, verse 40. When God, through the prophet, 
is looking forward to New Covenant realities, He says, and I will 
put my fear in their hearts. This is why Newton wrote that 
blessed hymn, Amazing Grace, how sweet to sound, that saved 
a wretch like me. He says, "'Twas grace that taught 
my heart to fear." The sons of Adam do not fear God. The sons 
of Adam are wayward. They go astray. They do not follow 
the Lord Most High. So when we read that she fears 
Yahweh, we know that the gracious work of God is causing her to 
fear God. And then turn for a moment to 
the book of Titus. We see how this reality, this 
fear of God, this faith in the Lord Jesus Christ affects practical 
ethics. In other words, what we believe 
concerning God is fleshed out in the way that we live for God. 
And we see that connection very specifically in Titus chapter 
2. Note what Titus is instructed 
to do. Verse 1, But as for you, speak 
the things which are proper for sound doctrine, that the older 
men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith and love and patience, 
the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, 
not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things, 
that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, 
to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, 
good, obedient to their husbands, that the word of God may not 
be blasphemed. He goes on to several other categories 
of men, and then note what he says in verses 11 to 15. Four, 
the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all 
men. In other words, since you have been saved by grace alone, 
through faith alone, in Christ alone, this is how old men are 
to function, this is how old women are to function, this is 
how they are to instruct young women to function, and this is 
how young men and servants are to engage. You've been saved, 
not so you can continue in sin, but you have been saved from 
your sins that you may adorn the gospel of our Lord and Savior, 
Jesus Christ. That grace of God that brings 
salvation has appeared to all men. Note what it instructs us 
in. Verse 12, teaching us that denying ungodliness and worldly 
lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the 
present age, looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing 
of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ. Again, in case 
we missed it, who gave Himself for us that He might redeem us 
from every lawless deed and purify for Himself His own special people, 
zealous for good works. So as we consider this Proverbs 
31 woman, specifically as she functions in motherhood, she 
is a woman who has been saved by grace alone, through faith 
alone, in Christ alone. But as well, we can surmise her 
spiritual condition as such is that she's not only saved, but 
she walks with the Lord. I mean, isn't the fear of the 
Lord descriptive of Christianity in the Old Testament? I think 
a lot of people have misunderstandings about what the fear of the Lord 
is all about. The fear of the Lord is biblical 
shorthand for a man rightly connected to his God, for a man who has 
believed the promises of God, for a man, and I mean women too, 
I'm including them under the generic term men, for those who 
have come out of darkness into marvelous light. Those who have 
been by grace saved will indeed walk with the Lord. It is the 
fear of the Lord. The Proverbs sets that forth 
in several places. Proverbs 3, verse 7. Proverbs 
8, verse 13. Proverbs 14, 26. And Proverbs 19, 23. In some mothers, it's not enough 
for your husband to be growing. It's not enough for your husband 
to be excelling in the things of God. It's not enough for him 
to be studying theology and reading the Scriptures. But you in motherhood 
need to be growing as well. A posterity shall serve him. 
Psalm 2230 says concerning the children of believers, well, 
how does that posterity learn of Christ? Yes, they learn it 
from fathers, but they learn it from mothers as well. So in 
order to instruct your children properly in the fear of the Lord, 
you must be maintaining a relationship that is marked by the fear of 
the Lord. So her spiritual condition is 
where we begin. Now notice secondly, her influence. A mother has great influence 
either for good or for ill. It is inculcated in the law of 
God itself. Exodus 20, verse 12, honor your 
father and your mother. Deuteronomy chapter 5, the same 
thing, verse 16, honor your father and your mother. Deuteronomy 
21, there is an instance or an account where there is an incorrigible 
son who the parents have both disciplined, whom the parents 
have both reproved, whom the parents have both corrected. 
And if he continues in his incorrigibility, his rebellion and insubordination, 
then the parents bring him to the elders at the gate in order 
to stone him to death. The mother's a participant in 
that. She has as much influence in 
the lives of these little ones, and therefore, she must indeed 
inculcate the fear of God, develop that fear of God, and pass it 
on to her children. I want to notice what C. H. Spurgeon says concerning this 
head, her influence. He says, Fathers and mothers 
are the most natural agents for God to use in the salvation of 
their children. You see, Paedo-Baptists believe 
that Baptists don't care about kids. We do care about kids. We love our kids. We want to 
see our kids rightly connected to God through our Lord Jesus 
Christ. We want them to believe the gospel. And most parents, I would hope 
every single parent that is a believer, prays daily for their children. 
They prayed daily that their little ones would come to know 
Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, and that those parents in their 
home would make that the emphasis, and that the thrust, and that 
the pressure, and that when you tend to those little ones, and 
when you engage in planning for their future, you always remind 
them, but the most important thing is that you are saved by 
the grace of God through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. So, 
it's not a Paedo-Baptist emphasis to say, well, they're really 
interested in the salvation of children. Baptists are as well. And I think what Spurgeon says 
is right. Fathers and mothers are the most natural agents for 
God to use in the salvation of their children. He said, I am 
sure that in my early youth, no teaching ever made such an 
impression upon my mind as the instruction of my mother. He's 
not saying my father was unimportant, my grandparents were unimportant, 
the pastors were unimportant. Listen to what he said. Who does 
a child spend most of its time with? Not me. Spends most of 
the time with the mother. I just said to somebody today, 
I'm pretty much convinced that if having children and raising 
children were left to men alone, there probably wouldn't be many 
children. The whole idea of having them would probably keep a lot 
of us off the playing field to begin with. They're with their 
mothers. He says, neither can I conceive 
that to any child there can be one who will have such influence 
over the young heart as the mother who has so tenderly cared for 
her offspring. He said, a man with a soul so 
dead as not to be moved by the sacred name of mother is creation's 
blot. Never could it be possible for 
any man to estimate what he owes to a godly mother. How can I 
ever forget her tearful eye when she warned me to escape from 
the wrath to come? I thought her lip eloquent. Others 
might not think so. But they were certainly eloquent 
to me. How can I ever forget when she bowed her knee and with 
her arms about my neck prayed, O that my son might live before 
thee? That's from the autobiography, 
The Early Years, where C.H. Spurgeon rehearses his youth. 
When asked what could be done to restore the prestige of France, 
Napoleon said, Give us better mothers. That's a powerful emphasis 
from that particular man. So you've got great influence 
for good or ill. Thirdly, her authority. Her authority. You have authority in the home. 
Again, Exodus 20, the corresponding text in Deuteronomy, and then 
in Ephesians 6, 1 and 2. Yes, fathers are directed to 
bring up their children in the training and the admonition of 
the Lord, but certainly mothers are included in that as well. 
Bible Dictionary says, honoring both parents is at the heart 
of the Ten Commandments. And the mother comes first in 
the command to respect, literally fear, them as part of national 
holiness in Leviticus 19.3. In terms of the actual engagement 
of this authority, turn to Proverbs 15. Proverbs 15. Both father and mother are to 
be heeded and obeyed. Proverbs 15 and verse 20. A wise 
son makes a father glad, but a foolish man despises... No, 
his mother. It's not just the father that's 
in view here. It's the mother as well. Honor 
your father and your mother. Both parents have authority. They are clothed with authority 
by God Most High. If that's not what the Fifth 
Commandment commands, I don't know what it does. honor them, 
treat them with respect, revere them, respect them, hold them 
in high esteem. The whole idea, the root behind 
the word honor means heavy. We treat them as being heavy, 
not in girth, but in terms of their weightiness, or in terms 
of their importance. And this is absolutely necessary 
in terms of the family dynamic. Notice in Proverbs 19, in verse 
26, He who mistreats his father and 
chases away his mother is a son who causes shame and reproach." 
Again, mothers are included in these particular injunctions. 
Proverbs 20 and verse 20, whoever curses his father or his mother, 
his lamp will be put out in deep darkness. And again, Proverbs 
23, 22 to 25. Proverbs 23, 22. Listen to your Father who begot 
you, and do not despise your mother when she is old. Buy the 
truth and do not sell it, also wisdom and instruction and understanding. 
The Father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, and he who begets 
a wise child will delight in Him. Let your father and your 
mother be glad, and let her who bore you rejoice." You need to 
understand this. The family is not ultimately 
a democracy. It is a parentocracy or a theocracy 
that is governed by the parents. They have the authority. They 
have the right to rule, not as tyrants, not as despots, not 
as abusers, not as those who misuse their authority, but nevertheless, 
the Lord God, in the fifth word, has clothed you with authority 
from on high. Notice, fourthly, her responsibility. And there are four things we 
ought to observe here. In the first place, she must 
instruct her children. She must instruct her children. 
Proverbs 1.8. Proverbs 1.8. My son, hear the instruction 
of your father and do not forsake the law of your mother. Proverbs 6.20. Same emphasis, 
Proverbs 6.20, My son, keep your father's command, and do not 
forsake the law of your mother. You see what's happening in old 
covenant Israel? Fathers and mothers clothed with 
authority from Yahweh are working in unison and working in concert 
to accomplish a specific goal. A posterity shall fear you. And in order for that posterity 
to hear of Him, in order to fear Him, they must be instructed 
from their youth. This is why in Deuteronomy 6, 
after the Shema, after the confession, Hear, O Israel, the Lord our 
God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your 
God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your 
mind. We then find those instructions given to parents to instruct 
their little ones to talk about the things of God when they rise 
up, when they walk by the way, and when they lie down. You must 
instruct your children. You must instruct them in the 
Law of God. You must instruct them in the 
Gospel of God. You must tell them what lawlessness 
looks like and define for them by the Scriptures. You must show 
them the glory of the Gospel, the glory of Christ. I'm not 
suggesting, mothers, that you iron and then you wash and then 
you spend three hours, but it's what's in you. It's how you instruct. It's how you go about your day. It's what they hear from you 
as they are near you. She must instruct. Secondly, 
she must set an example for her children. She must set an example 
for her children. People have wisely observed that 
we can undo with our actions what we preach up with our words. 
You see it in the case of preachers. A man stands in a pulpit and 
he preaches to be holy and to be godly and to be upright, and 
then he goes out and he lives in an ungodly and an unholy and 
an upright way. he undoes with his life what 
he has preached up in his preaching. And the same could be said for 
parents and mothers, bridges on Proverbs 22.6. He says, the 
mere talk to a child about religion without bringing it to bear upon 
his loose habits and self-willed tempers is utterly ineffective. I love the way Bridges just assumes 
that a child has loose habits and self-willed tempers. I don't 
think you could read the Proverbs without concluding the same. 
I don't think you could read the Bible without concluding 
the same. There has been, in the history of philosophy, this 
idea that men, when born, have a tabula rasa. That means a blank 
slate. Their hearts are blank. They're 
not either good and they're not evil. It's what happens in terms 
of nurture that affects them ultimately. Well, that's not 
what the Bible teaches. The wicked go estranged from 
the womb, speaking lies as soon as they are born. David, in Psalm 
51, traces his native depravity, not back to Bathsheba, not back 
to Uriah, but back to the womb. In sin did my mother conceive 
me. So you see, depravity, being 
in Adam, is true of the conceptus, and when that child is born, 
that child goes astray, speaking lies as soon as it is born. So 
Bridges assumes that, and you as faithful mothers ought to 
assume the same thing. He goes on to say, none of us 
live to himself alone. We're all spreading around us 
an influence, whether for good or for evil. Here, therefore, 
in our families lies the responsibility of Christian consistency. Now, if you're a parent like 
I'm a parent, consistency is always one of the most difficult 
struggles. You've heard the illustration I've used before. I preach a 
sermon on spanking children, and everybody goes home and says, 
we really need to tighten up. We used to call it the reign 
of terror when our children were little. Rebecca and I would be 
hearing a sermon, and it would be about disciplining children, 
and we'd institute a reign of terror when we got home. And 
boy, for that week or week and a half, every infraction, every 
transgression, we were there. I realized I could go to jail 
advocating such things, but I don't care about what the government 
says at this point. But then after that week and a half, or 
after that two weeks, we go back to being our normal schlobs where 
we have to fight and struggle and seek to main consistency 
and faithfulness. That's the name of the game, 
isn't it? Consistency. You know what? I think parents 
ought to pray for it. God, make me consistent. Not 
in unholiness, but in righteousness and in faithfulness. Consistency 
is the name of the game for the long haul. Not just in parenting, 
but in everything, isn't it? Same sort of thing. I might preach 
a sermon. You need to read your Bible and pray. Everybody goes 
home and on Monday morning they read their Bible and they pray. 
They get to Thursday and they're back in their old ways again. 
Consistency is the name of the game. Faithfulness, perseverance, 
steadiness, steadfastness. The Bible is filled with those 
terms. Why? Because God knows our heart. 
He knows we are prone to wander and prone to leave the God that 
we love. He's ordained the pulpit ministry for that very reason, 
so there's frequent reminders, there's frequent exhortations, 
there's frequent encouragements, so that we will seek to maintain 
faithfulness and consistency. Bridges goes on. If the child 
hears of godliness and sees but wickedness, this is bringing 
him bread with one hand and poison with the other, beckoning with 
the hand to heaven, and at the same time taking him by the hand 
and leading him in the way to destruction. Who would receive 
even the choicest food from a leprous hand? A child learns more by 
the eye than by the ear. Imitation is a far more powerful 
principle than memory. A well-trained child gladly looks 
to his parents' godliness as his model picture to copy after. A wayward child eagerly seeks 
for the excuse of his own delinquency, and this discovery and parental 
example will harden him in infidelity and ungodliness. Let me underscore 
something here. It's not a formula. If you simply 
set forth a good example, your children will be saved. It's 
not a formula that if you simply nurture them in the law and the 
gospel from their youth, they will be saved. That's not the 
case. God is sovereign. It's impossible for a man to 
save a child. It's impossible for a mother 
to save a child. But you faithfully and consistently 
and perseveringly use the means and pray to God to bless them 
so that this child may, in fact, be saved. But if the child is 
not saved, those things instilled in them from their youth will 
hopefully serve as a good restraint over the lawlessness that, if 
unrestrained, can go forth in all manner of wickedness and 
ungodliness. So, my dear sisters, instruct 
them, set an example for them, and thirdly, discipline them. 
Discipline them. Have we not learned what a difficult 
and a terrible thing an undisciplined child is? God sets the pattern 
in terms of discipline. God, according to Hebrews chapter 
12, disciplines us. Why? So that He may conform us 
unto the image of His beloved Son. It doesn't seem pleasant 
while we are smarting under the rod, but it does yield the peaceable 
fruit of righteousness. The same is true with your children. 
If you do not discipline them, it will be mayhem. It will be 
chaos. You must engage in discipline. And there are two methods. First, 
timeouts. No. Second, take away their waffles. No. First, the necessity to verbally 
reproof sinful children. This gets the most shrift in 
the Proverbs. It is verbal correction. It is 
verbal reproof. It is speaking to them with that 
authority that you've been clothed with from on high and telling 
little so-and-so not to do whatever. It's not suggested, it's not 
recommendations, it's not if you want to, but you give them 
commands. We've seen that already. Do not 
forsake the law of your mother. They must know that you mean 
business. That doesn't mean shouting at 
them, it doesn't mean screaming at them, it doesn't mean yelling 
at them, it doesn't mean waterboarding them, it just means correcting 
them with Your verbal reproof. We are to bring them up in the 
fear and admonition of the Lord, but we're not to exasperate them 
or provoke them to anger and shouting and yelling and screaming 
and counting to three or fifteen or a hundred. That's not going 
to get it. So you need to verbally reprove 
sinful children. But as well, you need to engage 
in corporal punishment. The rod and the reproof give 
wisdom. This is the connection that we 
see very often throughout Scripture. Corporal punishment in view is 
not child abuse. It's not whacking them across 
the head. It's not five across the eyes. 
It's not a skull thump. It's not, you know, doing something 
that endangers their lives. But it is the case that God the 
Lord says that with verbal reproof there is as well that implementation 
of corrective discipline. Bridges says it ought to be done 
in such a way that we reveal our love for them. He says the 
rod without affection is revolting tyranny. And as I said, several 
Proverbs speak to this issue. Children, don't be afraid. This 
is what the Bible says, and it's for your good. And I think that 
when you learn this and understand this, you will realize that this 
is a means by which my parents demonstrate their love. Proverbs 
13 and verse 24. Proverbs 13 and verse 24. He who spares his rod hates his 
son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly. Now, I shared a 
bit of Spurgeon's autobiography. I'll share a bit of my autobiography. 
Some of you have heard this before. I'm sorry, after 19 years, I'm 
sure some of the illustrations get old and they get stale. But 
when I was a child, I understood what this proverb meant, not 
because I went to Sunday school, not because some popish priest 
preached it to us in the homily, but because I had a father that 
did not discipline me. I had a father that I could sin 
in front of, and he wouldn't do nothing. And my friends thought 
that was cool, and they thought it was neat, and your dad is 
so nice. But in my heart of hearts, I 
knew that if this man truly loved me, he wouldn't let me do these 
things. That's what Solomon is saying. 
He who spares his rod hates his son. You're not doing them any 
favors by allowing them to run into mayhem and wickedness. put 
the brakes on them, restrain them, stop them, do whatever 
it takes so that they don't run headlong into hell. This is the 
emphasis. He who loves Him disciplines 
Him promptly. Again, brethren, it's not abuse, 
it's not waterboarding, it's not anything like that. It is 
the implementation of discipline as God defines it in Holy Scripture. Notice Proverbs 19 and verse 
18. Proverbs 19 and verse 18, chasten your son while there 
is hope. And note the contrast, and do 
not set your heart on his destruction. What can we rightly imply or 
infer? If we do not chasten our son 
while there is hope, it could be the case that we have set 
our heart on his destruction. The absence of chastening means 
the presence of setting our heart on his destruction. But when 
we do not set our heart on its destruction, we are indeed chastening 
Him while there is hope. Notice in Proverbs 20 and verse 
30. Proverbs 20 and verse 30, blows 
that hurt cleanse away evil, as do stripes the inner depths 
of the heart. Again, you might be wanting to 
call the social services when you get home tonight and say, 
he is advocating horrific things. I'm simply trying to exegete 
what God's Word says. We do what God says, not what 
the civil government tells us when they tell us to disobey 
God. Right? Because they want to celebrate 
same-sex marriage? We're not going to do that. Because 
they want to disarm parents from the exercise of lawful authority? 
We cannot do that. Now, certainly don't do it in 
the public square. Don't take your kid out to Five Corners 
and say, I'm going to let you out. Don't do that, brethren. 
Be wise. Be cunning. But at the same time, 
we must not reject the word of the living God. Proverbs 22, 
15. Foolishness is bound up in the 
heart of a child. The rod of correction will drive 
it far from him. I'm not making this up. Dr. Spock 
certainly didn't make this up. Solomon, under the inspiration 
of God the Holy Spirit, gave us these tactics in the use of 
bringing up our children. You see, sin is such, and lawlessness 
is such, that it must be stopped. It mustn't be. Encouraged. It must not be subsidized. It 
must not be winked at. It must be verbally corrected 
and reproved. And if that does not finish the 
business, then we take to what God has provided elsewhere. Proverbs 
23, 13 and 14. Do not withhold correction from 
a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. 
You shall beat him with a rod and deliver his soul from hell. 
Again, the stakes are high. It's a deliverance of his soul 
from hell. And then Proverbs 29, 15. Proverbs 29, 15. The rod and rebuke give wisdom. You see, those two things that 
we've already outlined, verbal correction and corporal discipline. The rod and rebuke give wisdom, 
but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. You see 
that today, don't you? We don't want to hurt this little 
child in terms of, you know, making our decisions his decisions. We don't want to influence him 
one way or the other. We want to raise him in a caring, 
loving home where he just gets to decide for himself if he wants 
to be a Buddhist or a Muslim or an atheist. That's not what 
God has said to you, Christian parent. God has said to you that 
a posterity shall serve Him. And in order for that posterity 
to serve Him, they must hear of Him. They must believe on 
Him. They must bow down to Him. They must be taught when they 
rise up, when they walk by the way, and when they lie down. 
They must be pointed to God. specifically. And then Proverbs 
29 and verse 17, correct your son and he will give you rest. Yes, he will give delight to 
your soul. We all know the implication the 
other way. If we do not correct our son, 
does he give us rest? No. Does it work just letting 
him do his thing? No. If we do not correct our 
son, does he give delight to our soul? No. We need to implement 
those things that God has given to us for the good of our little 
ones and for the glory ultimately of God. So in terms of a responsibility, 
instruct the children, set an example for children, discipline 
the children, and then fourthly and finally, love the children. Love them. Isn't that what Paul 
tells Timothy, or Titus rather, to tell the older women, or to 
have the older women instruct the younger women that they love 
their children? You may say, wow, that just seems like a no-brainer. 
Every woman loves her child. That's not the case. It's not 
the case. It took me about five seconds 
to find an illustration from last week of a mother who does 
not love her child. In a harrowing case, An Indiana 
college student is being accused of drowning her newborn son in 
a bathtub and laughing about the experience. Police charged 
Michaela Munn, 21, of Elkhart with murder this week after they 
said she killed her newborn son in March in her Manchester University 
dorm. The news station reports newly 
unsealed court documents that indicate Munn showed no remorse 
or distress at her baby's death and even laughed several times. 
As I said, it took me about five seconds to find that story. I 
did glimpse it on Twitter. I traced the link and there it 
was. are coming more often, increasingly. And why not? When the state authorizes 
the lawful murder of babies in the wombs, why would we be shocked 
when somebody in a college university dorm does something like that? 
I mean, we should be shocked, because it's absolutely abominable. 
But you know, it's not. The daughters of Adam struggle 
with loving their offspring. And if you struggle with loving 
your offspring, listen to the words in Titus, you need to love 
your children. All these things that I've suggested 
are your responsibility, to instruct them and to set an example for 
them and to discipline them, are done in the orbit of love. 
You're not a robot, you're not just doling out punishment, you're 
not just engaged in rote memorization, you do it in the context of love. You must love your children. Well, that's our exposition. 
Just a couple of thoughts in conclusion. I want to suggest 
first her scarcity. This kind of woman's hard to 
find, isn't she? One of you brothers happened 
to have found one, do what the brother in this passage does, 
praise her. Her scarcity. Isn't that what 
verse 10 says? Who can find a virtuous wife? 
Who can find one whose worth is far above Ruby's? Who can 
find one that looks like this? Who can find one that engages 
in her life to serve her husband and to serve her children? Today 
we're told, serve yourself. Do everything you do for you. 
You make that man, you make those children subservient to you. That's not what you find in Proverbs 
31. I think even within the church 
we've been affected by a feminism that does not see the proper 
application in God's world of God's order. She is scarce. As I said from the outset, the 
rhetorical questioner, as I quoted Waltke, who can find aims to 
awaken within the audience the desire to find such a wife or 
to be like her? Mothers hear this, wives hear 
this, husbands hear this, but single men hear this as well. 
Matthew Henry, this description of the virtuous woman is designed 
to show what wives the women should make and what wives the 
men should choose. If you are a young man looking 
for a woman, charm is deceitful and beauty is passing. But a 
woman who fears Yahweh, she shall be praised. This ought to be 
your list. This ought to be what you pray 
over when you say, God, give me a wife. It shouldn't first 
and foremost be, I want her to look like this. It should be, 
I want her to function like this. Secondly, we ought to see her 
dependence. Her dependence. Again, there's 
a lot contained in 30b. A woman who fears Yahweh, she 
shall be praised. The fear of the Lord is all-encompassing. The fear of the Lord characterizes 
her life. The fear of the Lord works its 
way out through her Bible reading. through her prayer, through her 
attendance at the public means of grace. She fears the Lord. She is dependent upon God. She 
understands that this job is very difficult. Of all the jobs 
in the world, being fathers and mothers are very difficult positions, 
because you are directly responsible for the emotional well-being 
or woe of a child. Again, I've said this before. 
I like the grandkids. I'm not as directly connected 
in ruining their lives as I was in my own kids. It's nice to 
be able to hug them and to kiss them and to play with them and 
to send them to their parents and let them work it out. I'm just kidding. I hope I take 
a bit of a more active role in it than that. But you know, there's 
nothing more difficult than being responsible for other human beings. 
This is one of the tough things about being a pastor. They shall 
give an account for your soul. Do you know what that's like? 
It's going to be hard enough to give an account for my soul, 
let alone your soul. And the same is true with parenting. 
We're going to give an account for the way that we raise these 
little ones. We're going to either send decent, normal human beings 
out into the world, or we're not. And we need to make sure 
that we understand our dependences upon Yahweh. Thirdly, her encouragement 
from her husband Notice in verse 28, her husband also, and he 
praises her. Now, if you're like me, you were 
under the school of thought that if we ever tell anybody anything 
good about themselves, they'll get proud and arrogant. Well, 
I don't know that that's always the case. They're already proud 
and arrogant, so a little bit of a praise isn't going to hurt 
them too much. Husbands, praise your wives. She ought to know 
that what she is doing is a good thing. I mean, why do you want 
to see her do all these things and never, ever speak a good 
word? If you cannot say, many daughters have done well, but 
you excel them all from some false assumption that, well, 
she'll just get proud. You haven't studied and you haven't 
understood Proverbs 31. Many daughters have done nobly, 
but you excel them all. Thank you for being this kind 
of a woman, this kind of a wife, this kind of a mother. Thank 
you for putting up with me and for helping the children and 
all the sorts of things that you do." Notice her encouragement 
from her children. Verse 28, her children rise up 
and call her blessed. I'm with Spurgeon, a man who 
can hear the name mother and not be moved is creation's blot. And I would suggest, especially 
in this church, I know your mothers, and I know what they are doing, 
and I know that they are schlepping you to church each and every 
Lord's Day, and they are seeking to bring you up in the training 
and the admonition of the Lord. You ought to rise up and call 
them blessed. You ought to appreciate that. 
Many of us were not raised with those sorts of things. Many of 
us had no connection, no introduction to Christianity when we were 
little babies and brought up in that context. We didn't have 
the shorter catechism screwed in our heads when we were 10 
so that we could recall it when we were 25. We were brought up 
in godless pagan situations, and even then, we rised up and 
we called them blessed. How is it for a child raised 
in a home where the gospel is central, doesn't ever say thank 
you to his mother, or thank you to his father, or show some respect 
or some love or some esteem? Brethren, this is what is deserving 
in this regard. And then as well, her encouragement 
from the community. Look at what it says. Verse 31, 
Give her of the fruit of her hands and let her own works. 
Praise her in the gates. Where were the gates? That was 
the place where commerce, or rather politics, was conducted 
in the city. Her husband's in the gates. He's 
trafficking with the elders of the city. They're engaged in 
the outworking of civil polity. She is doing such a good job 
that she is recognized in the community itself. Now, this is 
contra to our society. I remember way back when, and 
this is going back some years, I was, and I hate to admit it, 
brethren, a bit embarrassed at times to tell my buddies at work, 
yeah, my wife is pregnant, you know, I'm third kid or fourth 
kid, because what is the response from the world to, oh, you're 
having more kids? She doesn't work? She's not out there making 
widgets? She's not a wage earner? How 
could you ever exceed the 2.5 children, and the car, and the 
boat, and the song? It's not popular today to stay 
at home and raise children. But who cares what's popular? 
I echo Napoleon. How do we make Canada great again? 
Give us good mothers! Without the godly influence of 
faithful motherhood in the home, society looks like, oh, like 
what it looks like now. And we ought not to underestimate 
it. And if our community, and if 
our environment, and if our society rolls their collective eyes at 
us having children and seeking to bring them up in the training 
and admonition of the Lord, now I've learned, let them roll their 
eyes. Let them engage in that folly 
and madness. We will serve Yahweh. And then finally, her message. 
Sisters, you need to be theologically adept. You need to know the Scriptures. In order to teach children, you 
need to teach them correctly. Do not teach them to be papists. Do not teach them justification 
is by faith plus words. Teach them that justification 
is by faith alone. Teach them that sanctification 
is by the power of the Holy Spirit according to the will and the 
word of the living God. teach them the truth as it is 
in Jesus. You need to understand the truth 
as it is in Jesus, so that you can rightly articulate it to 
those little ones. If you botch it up at that level, 
it will bring confusion to them. Now, I'm not saying you've got 
to be Spurgeon or you've got to be Spurgeon's mother. I am 
suggesting, however, that you ought to commit to memory some 
basic truths concerning Christ's gospel, so that when you have 
these little ones and they're engaged in their folly or in 
their madness, you're able to push them, or point them rather, 
or direct them to the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ. Know what 
the law's demands are. Know what they have broken. Tell 
them what they have broken, how they have broken it. Pray with 
them when you discipline them, and surround them with the love 
that Paul says they need to have. Well, I hope that this serves 
as an encouragement to the mothers, I hope it's not a terror to the 
children, and I hope that all of us, at least in some form 
or another, will benefit from this. But I want to finish with 
that observation, a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be 
praised. There is nothing greater, nothing 
more important not the praise, but the fear of the Lord. It 
is the beginning of life. It is what is needful. And the 
way that we fear the Lord by the grace of God today is by 
believing the Gospel, by looking to the Lord Jesus Christ. If 
the fear of the Lord in the Old Covenant was a theological shorthand 
for a person rightly connected to God, we call that person today 
a Christian, a believer, one who, by grace, has looked and 
who has lived. we need, by His grace, to walk 
in the fear of the Lord as well. Well, let us pray. Father, we 
thank You for the Word of God. We thank You for the grace that 
You give us as parents. We thank You for the grace that 
You give us as single people. We thank You for the grace that 
You give us in each station and in each calling in our lives. 
And we thank You as well that Your Word does not leave us destitute 
or void. but it describes for us things 
concerning matters of faith and practice. And I pray that we 
would take Your Word, take it to heart, that we would contemplate 
it, hide it in our hearts, so that we might not sin against 
You. We pray that You would go with us now and watch over us 
in this coming week. Grant us grace to bring glory 
and honor and praise to You. And we ask through Jesus Christ 
our Lord. Amen.