Please turn with me in your Bibles to Proverbs chapter 31. Proverbs chapter 31. We're going to consider the Christian mother this morning. God willing, we'll return to our exposition in Matthew in two weeks' time.

Pastor Porter will be preaching next Lord's Day, so please remember him in your prayers. did want to consider this particular topic as it is an appropriate subject for us to consider. But if you are not a mother or a grandmother, please do not tune out. I believe there is something here for each and every one of us. But I do want to read Proverbs 31, verses 10 to 31.

Who can find a virtuous wife, for her worth is far above rubies? The heart of her husband safely trusts her, so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax and willingly works with her hands.

She is like the merchant ships. She brings her food from afar. She also rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and a portion for her maidservants. She considers a field and buys it.

From her profits, she plants a vineyard. She girds herself with strength and strengthens her arms. She perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night. She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle.

She extends her hand to the poor. Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet. She makes tapestry for herself.

Her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them and supplies sashes for the merchants. Strength and honor are her clothing.

She shall rejoice in time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed.

Her husband also, and he praises her. Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands and let her own words praise her in the gates.

Amen. Well, let us pray. Our Holy Father, we come before You now, and we pray for the ministry and the aid of Your Spirit. The Lord Jesus said, apart from Him we can do nothing.

The Apostle establishes the practice of praying for illumination. So we pray, Lord God, that You would just fill our minds and our hearts with understanding. We ask that You would forgive us of all of our sins, so we confess those iniquities to You even now. We thank you for your word that says, if we confess our sins, you are faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

May you wash us and purify us and may you help us to take every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ. For those, God, who've come here this morning outside of Christ, we pray that today would be the day of salvation. We pray that through Your Word and by the power of Your Holy Spirit, You would bring forth sinners in the exercise of Your sovereign will. We know that salvation is of the Lord.

We know, Lord God, that it is You who calls to life those things which are dead. We ask that You would just do this for Your glory's sake. We ask that You would do this for Your honor and for Your praise. As well, Lord, I pray for the mothers here.

I pray that their hearts would be encouraged and cheered and challenged and encouraged by the Scriptures. We pray for those ladies that are expecting that you would just grant them health and strength and grace. Certainly, as we read in our Bibles, children are a gift from you. And help us each as parents.

Help us each even as single people to set forth a good example to these little ones. And may you do a great thing in their lives. And we ask through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen.

Introduction

Well, as I said, our focus this morning will be on the Christian mother, so we'll have cause to look at several places in the Holy Scripture. Last Lord's Day, we brought two men into the diaconate, and I had indicated that the diaconate is probably one of those very... is a very thankless job. Deacons serve, they don't always get the notoriety or the appreciation that they undergo. And I would say that even more exceedingly probably is a thankless job is the life of a mother.

She does everything. She does all things and she does it without a lot of praise and a lot of applause. So our purpose here this morning is not to praise and applause them, but rather to encourage and instruct us all with reference to the scripture. And the end game, of course, is the praise and the honor and the glory of God Most High.

So as I said, we'll proceed in sort of a topical manner.

Four Aspects of the Christian Mother

I want to look at four aspects of the Christian mother. First, we'll notice her spiritual condition. Secondly, her influence. Thirdly, her authority. And fourthly, her responsibility.

Her Spiritual Condition

The first is her spiritual condition. She is not a Christian mother unless she's a Christian. She's not a Christian because she's a good mother. She is a Christian because of God's grace.

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now I'm found, was blind but now I see. The Christian mother is not a Christian mother apart from the saving work of God Most High, as Jesus Christ taught in John 3. Unless one is born again, he cannot see the Kingdom of Heaven.

In Ephesians chapter 2, verses 8 to 10, that very famous statement of the Apostle Paul in terms of salvation, he says in verse 8, You have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. The Christian mother, first and foremost, is one who, by the grace of God, has been conquered, one who has been subdued, one who has been saved, one who has been called out of darkness into marvelous light. If you are a mother here this morning and you are not a believer in Jesus Christ, my message to you is not, go out and be a better mother.

My message to you is to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ. Go to the one in whom alone there is forgiveness of sins. Go to the one in whom alone there is a righteousness that avails with God. You probably hear us refer to that oftentimes in this local church because it's so important.

What we need is not only forgiveness of sins, as important as that is, but we need a righteousness. We need a wedding garment. We need to be able to stand before God. And the doctrine of justification teaches that in the gospel, the Lord Most High answers to both of those needs that men and women have.

We need forgiveness, we need blood atonement, we need cleansing. As the book of Hebrews says, without the shedding of blood, there is no remission, no forgiveness. But we also need that garment. We need to stand clothed in a righteousness not our own.

We need to be accepted by God. When the Lord God Most High looks upon us, He sees sin, he sees calamity, he sees destruction, he sees wretchedness. And it's only through Christ that we receive that forgiveness and we receive that garment. And then, with reference to her spiritual condition, the idea of her salvation, the reality of her having come to Christ, is the basis upon which she effectively mothers her children.

We can't miss that. It's not the case that a mother does her job well and God saves her. No, it is the case that God saves her so that she can do her job well. Titus chapter 2, that's the emphasis.

We've seen this, or we looked at this last week in our study in 1 Timothy. Titus chapter 2, the apostle tells Titus as he's ministering in Crete to give various exhortations to various people groups. In Titus 2.1 he says, but as for you, speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine. That the older men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience.

The older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things. What sorts of things are they to teach? Who is the audience that they are to teach? Are they to be preachers?

Are they to be Sunday school teachers? Are they to be laboring in a pulpit ministry? No, they're to find the younger women in the church and teach them. Set example to them.

Give them instruction. It doesn't have to be formal. You don't have to have a classroom setting. Older ladies, you don't need a whiteboard. or a chalkboard.

You simply need to demonstrate in your life and by your words to the younger women among us how they're supposed to function, how they're supposed to do their task. And that's what Paul then indicates in verse 4, that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the Word of God may not be blasphemed. Likewise, verse 6, exhort the young men to be sober-minded. You see the pattern.

Old men, do this. Old women, do this. Young men, do this. And of course in there, young women, do this.

Now note the basis. the foundation, the theological context for this. In other words, if we ask the question, how as Christians are we to be effective as old men, as young men, as old women, as young women, it's because of verse 11. He says, for the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching us that denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us. You see, ladies, you don't function in your homes tomorrow apart from the cross.

You don't discipline your little ones apart from the cross. You don't serve in the capacity in the domestic sphere, apart from the cross. Everything that the Christian does is cross-oriented. And this is what the Apostle says.

Young men, old men. Young women, old women. Here's how you are to function, and the reason for it, theologically concerned, is verse 11, for the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. Verse 14 specifically highlights the redemptive work of Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us, that He might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself His own special people, zealous for good works.

So Christian mothers make sure that first and foremost, You're cross-oriented, Christ-oriented, gospel-saturated, those who make much of Jesus. It was for no accident that we sang 582. Your encouragement as mothers ought to be, my hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness. Because if you're the one woman out there that I've never spoken to, most women think they're not doing a great job in mothering.

Let me just tell you, none of us do a great job in anything that God calls us to do. That's why Jesus came to die and rise again. It's the beauty of the gospel, right? It's the glory of Christ.

If righteousness comes through the law, Paul says, then Christ died in vain. What's the implication? Christ didn't die in vain. Righteousness does not come through the law to lawbreakers, to covenant breakers, to those in Adam.

Righteousness comes through grace. Righteousness comes through the imputation of Christ's righteousness received by faith alone. She is saved by grace in terms of her spiritual condition. She is walking with the Lord.

Justification and Ongoing Sanctification

She not only has come to the cross initially for justification, but she walks with the Lord in sanctification. This is the point in Proverbs 31.30. A woman who fears the Lord. Several other places in the book of Proverbs.

Proverbs chapter 3 at verse 7. Proverbs chapter 3 at verse 7. The importance, dear ladies, dear sisters, of ensuring that you are maintaining a relationship with God Most High. Over and above the devotions you have with your husband, over and above the devotions you have with your children, you ought to be cultivating vital religion with the Lord God Most High, through the use of the means that He's ordained.

Your Bible, your prayer, your public means, church, worship, sacraments, baptism, Lord's Supper, all these things confirm and strengthen and help the people of God to grow. Of course, men, you ought to make sure that your wives have the opportunity to do these particular things.

Fearing the Lord in Daily Life

Notice in Proverbs 3 verse 7, not specifically to motherhood, but the reality of fearing the Lord. Do not be wise in your own eyes, fear Yahweh and depart from evil. Same thing is identified in Proverbs chapter 8. And verse 13, the fear of the Lord means to avoid evil.

Proverbs 8, 13. The fear of the Lord is to hate evil, pride and arrogance in the evil way, and the perverse mouth I hate. Proverbs 14 and verse 26. Notice again, these are not texts specifically designated for mothers.

Mothers are humans. I know that may not always be obvious, because they do superhuman things, but they're human beings. Notice there's not a class of texts specifically allocated for women, mothers, and wives. What's the implication of that?

Women, mothers, wives are just like men, husbands, and fathers, and all of us under God ought to be maintaining vital communion with God. It is an unfortunate reality that has somehow made its way into the church. The only people really interested in theology are a few guys who teach or preach, and then those guys that show up early on Saturday morning. I think it would be further from the truth.

When Jesus defines eternal life in John 17 3, it's not only with reference to the man, who are recipients of eternal life. This is eternal life that they, men and women, might know Thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom Thou hast sent. Ladies, pick up a theology book. Ladies, search the scriptures.

Ladies, nurture your souls. Where's the power and the grace and the strength going to come when you need to resist the demonic, not maybe demonic, the wicked influences that are represented in your home by children in Adam? How do you do that? Didn't we just learn in Ephesians chapter 6?

To be strong with might in the power of the Lord? How do we deal with such things in the context of the home when we are not properly armed and readied for the battle? Proverbs 14, 26. In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence and His children will have a place of refuge.

Proverbs 19 and verse 23. If you don't read the Proverbs, you ought to read the Proverbs. Proverbs 19 and verse 23, the fear of the Lord leads to life, and he who has it will abide in satisfaction. He will not be visited with evil.

As I said, it's not just men who need to study the Bible, it's ladies. And it's not just mothers, it's single ladies as well. Again, don't tune out. If you notice as we move through these points, while there might be a few details that are specific to a woman with children, the bulk of it is specific to all of us.

You need to grow. There's really no excuse for us to be stagnant in the 21st century. There's really no excuse with the wealth of materials that are available. On the one hand, we can blast the modern church when they have Star Wars services center stage on Easter Sunday.

We can blast the modern church who pronounce as a benediction on May the 4th, May the 4th be with you. We can blast the charismatic and the Pentecostal excesses and forget that in many respects we live in a particular time where there is some very solid, very sound, expository preaching right at the touch of a button. We forget that Amazon.com has made book ordering simpler than going to the bathroom. for us to say that I don't have the resources or I don't have the ability or I don't have the prevalence of stuff to help me move into a place of being a sound theologian at, that's simply unacceptable. You say, well, I'm so busy.

Tell your husband you need to study. You don't know what my life is like. We have so many modern conveniences to free us up. You don't have to take shirts out anymore and beat them against a rock.

You just throw them in a box, seal the box shut, and for an hour it spins and does its things. The big chore is pulling it out, folding it, and putting it in its other box. We live our lives in boxes, don't we? Box to box to box to the final box.

That's just the way the progression goes. Ladies, I'm not here to lambast. I'm not here to chastise. I'm here to encourage.

When you're dealing with childlike rebellion in your children, it is a spiritual battle first and foremost. There's physical means to use, to be sure, but it's a spiritual battle. And if you're not equipped, and if you're not ready for the battle, you will be bested. And husbands, if you don't see that, and if you don't provide for your wives, the time, the resources, the space, so that she can have her own devotional life.

And husbands, you need to get on board.

Her Influence

Secondly, look at her spiritual condition. We have to note her influence. When Napoleon, not advocating Napoleon by any stretch of the imagination, but when Napoleon was asked what would be done or what could be done to restore the prestige of France, he said this, give us better mothers. Give us better mothers.

Her influence is high. Her calling is noble. I'm always frustrated and always offended when I hear people in the world, and unfortunately it seeps its way into the church, say, well, you're only a housewife, or you only have children, or you only do this. That's an insult.

Walter Chantry, several years ago, wrote a great article, it became a pamphlet, I think Banner publishes it, The High Calling of Motherhood. Napoleon surveys France. He says, give us better mothers. I would argue in our situation, not only do we need better mothers, we need better fathers too.

We're dealing this morning with mothers.

The Decalogue and Maternal Influence

Exodus 20 verse 12. It's the heart of the Decalogue. Honor your father and your mother. It's interesting, in Leviticus 19.3, as the laws are being elucidated and amplified and applied to society, and the children of Israel are told to honor their mothers and their fathers.

It's not just your father. It's not just his authority. It's not just his influence. It is not just his power that prevails in the home, but it's the mother.

Spurgeon on Motherly Influence

Spurgeon said this, fathers and mothers are the most natural agents for God to use in the salvation of their children. Spurgeon's a Baptist. We're talking about a paedobaptist context here. Where as long as we sprinkle our infants, we can include them in the covenant and accept that everything is going to be fine with that.

No, we don't believe that. There is a distinctive particular Baptist covenant theology that we affirm and hold to. But by affirming and holding to that, we do not discount the place of family. Again, something very offensive and insulting from the Paedo-Baptist brethren.

They say, you Baptists really don't care about your children. You treat them like heathen. You treat them like outsiders. You treat them like they're outside the covenant of grace.

Well, until such time as they believe the gospel, we have no reason to include them in the covenant of grace. But that notwithstanding, they're part of our family. Spurgeon says, fathers and mothers are the most natural agents for God to use in the salvation of their children. He says, I am sure that in my early youth, no teaching ever made such an impression upon my mind as the instruction of my mother.

Does anybody here know Charles Spurgeon's mother's name? Mrs. Spurgeon, right? That's it.

It's like Mrs. Manoa, the mother of Samson. We don't know her name. She was the one that had faith.

Remember, Manoa says, God's going to kill us. Mrs. Manoa said, if he hadn't killed us by now, he's not going to kill us. Look who C.H.

Spurgeon attributes human instrumentality to in being the means that brought him into salvation. His mother. While she may be obscure to the rest of history, while she may be obscure to the rest of the world, while she may be obscure even in this context, because we don't know her first name, we don't know her birthday, we don't know her middle name, we don't know anything else about her. God used this woman to bring this man into prominence. not a prominence for his own sake, and not a prominence for his own glory, but that the name of Jesus Christ might be magnified.

So every soul that was saved under the preaching of a Charles Haddon Spurgeon indirectly is related to the mother of C. H. Spurgeon, who appealed to her young son to flee to Christ. You see what your influence is like?

Spurgeon says, I am sure that in my early youth no teaching ever made such an impression upon my mind as the instruction of my mother. Neither can I conceive that to any child there can be one who will have such influence over the young heart as the mother who has so tenderly cared for her offspring. to share a bit of autobiographical ignorance. I didn't recognize how much influence my wife exercised on our children when they were young and we were all doing our thing. I see it more vividly with my daughters and their children.

The amount of influence, the amount of time spent, the amount of one-on-one interaction The amount of hours consolidated together is mind-blowing. Who is going to exercise the minds of our children more than their mothers? And again, I'm not neglecting fathers. Do not check out on me, fathers.

Typically, fathers are at work for 10, 12, 15, 17 hours a day. Their roles in many respects is management, make sure that everything is being conducted under their watch, under their charge. It's the mother that exercises this amount of influence. Again, back to Spurgeon.

Neither can I conceive that to any child there can be one who will have such influence over the young heart as the mother who has so tenderly cared for her offspring. A man with a soul so dead as not to be moved by the sacred name of mother is creation's blot. Amen. Never could it be possible for any man to estimate what he owes to a godly mother.

Some of us didn't have Christian mothers, and can amen Spurgeon here, in terms of the influence that an unbelieving mother was able to exercise. How much more in this context, where the ladies here are walking with the Lord, and they are exercising a godly influence. Often said it, you kids ought to be very thankful. Ingratitude on the part of some of you is just absolutely unconscionable.

On the part of all of you. You have families, you have church, you have means, you have Bibles, you have so much. So much. Spurgeon says, never could it be possible for any man to estimate what he owes to a godly mother.

How can I ever forget her tearful eye when she warned me to escape from the wrath to come? I thought her lip eloquent. Others might not think so, but they certainly were eloquent to me. How can I ever forget when she bowed her knee and with her arms about my neck prayed, oh, that my son might live before thee?

He reports in another context where his mother, exhorting the children to flee the wrath to come, pressing upon them the claims of Jesus Christ, testifies to her children, if you are Christless on that day, I will stand with him to condemn you. Because she as a mother knew, she pressed those claims upon them dutifully. The influence is great. Just. a housewife.

You take the most powerful CEO in the most powerful company, he has no degree of influence over his employees that a mother does over her children. I don't care who he is, I don't care how many accolades he has, I don't care how many degrees, I don't care if he's on the fortune 500 list of best people ever. He doesn't exercise a tithe of influence that a mother does upon her children, for good and for ill, too.

Her Authority

Thirdly, look at her condition, her influence, her authority. Her authority. This is troubling at times when children challenge the mother because she's not the father. She has equal authority.

Now, the father is the head of the home. That's scripture, that's Bible, that's the way it is. There's a marching order in God's world. This is offensive to humanists, it's offensive to feminists, it's offensive to a lot of professing Christians, but the husband is the head of the wife.

Ephesians 5. You cannot do exegetical gymnastics to reduce the importance of that fact. But having said that, it does not militate against or strip away the authority that she receives from God in the Decalogue itself. Exodus 20, 12.

Deuteronomy 5, 16. Honor your father and your mother. She has authority. She is clothed with it from on high.

She wields the Word of God. She wields the instruments and the implements that God has equipped her with. Honoring both parents, a new international dictionary of theology says, honoring both parents is at the heart of the Ten Commandments. And the mother comes first in the command to respect or fear them as part of national holiness.

I already referred to this in Leviticus 19.3. It's mother first and then father. Again, not saying that father is unimportant. Not reversing that particular instituted order that God gave at creation, but esteeming and highlighting and recognizing the authority of a mother in Israel.

Authority Grounded in Scripture

What does Paul tell the Ephesian children in Ephesians chapter 6? Honor your father and your mother, which is the first commandment with promise. If you do so, you will live long in the land. That's the implication.

If you don't, Proverbs says, the birds of the air will pluck your eyes out. Delma makes this reference in his book on the Ten Commandments. He says, mentioning the mother is no afterthought, for she deserves to be treated with as much respect as the father. Practice demonstrates that children can misuse the fact that a mother's physical condition often renders her less able to enforce her word.

Some of these things are offensive to people. You know, Peter tells us to honor our wives, to dwell with them in understanding as the weaker vessel. Ladies say, you know, I'm strong as any man. It amuses me that at the gym I warm up with what the strong ladies are maxing with.

That's not a dig at them, it's not to be vicious to them, it's not to be mean to them. It's the way God made it. It's good. Husbands aren't supposed to exploit that weakness.

They're not supposed to bring it out and highlight it. They're supposed to honor their wives and dwell with them according to understanding. But sometimes it happens with children along the way. They somehow think that dad is the one we ought to fear and tremble before.

And you know, mom, we can just do whatever. I don't want to be mean, I don't want to be unkind, but young men, sometimes this happens when you hit, as Albert Martin calls it, puberty. You've got to be careful that you don't assert yourselves against your mom. It's interesting because you'll always come back and say, I'm sorry.

Mom, I love you. You're great. You're awesome. I shouldn't have been such a knucklehead.

Dalma says practice demonstrates that children can misuse the fact that a mother's physical condition often renders her less able to enforce her word. She is physically the weaker parent. But the Fifth Commandment clearly requires respect for both father and mother. Children must honor their mother, even when she is physically and physiologically declining.

Do not despise your mother when she is old, Proverbs 23, 22. We will see this tonight, 1 Timothy 5, 3-16. Who does Paul say is first and foremost responsible for widows? Children and grandchildren.

What's in Paul's mind? Probably the fifth commandment. Probably Solomon's Proverbs. Probably this idea that we are not to despise our mothers when she is old.

He then says the Bible presents a relationship of authority between husband and wife where the husband takes the lead, but children must show equal honor to both mother and father. She has authority. How many times in the book of Proverbs are we told to listen to our mother? You can write them down and look at them later.

Proverbs 15, 20, 19, 26, 20, 20, 23, 22 to 25. God is not playing games in this. Your mom has authority over you.

Her Responsibility

Fourthly, her responsibility. Mothers, what are you supposed to do? Well, first, you're to instruct your children. Proverbs chapter 1, verse 8.

Proverbs 1, verse 8. My son, hear the instruction of your father and do not forsake the law of your mother. What's the implication? The father's instructing and the mother's instructing, and specifically the mother. is teaching commandment, law, those things which ought to restrain the corruptions of her darling little baby boy or girl.

Proverbs 6 and verse 20. My son, keep your father's command and do not forsake the law of your mother. Ladies, instruct your children. Yes, teach them the ABCs.

That is invaluable. If they don't learn the ABCs, they'll never learn to read the Bible. If you don't teach them 2 plus 2, they'll never be able to buy something at the store without getting taken. Teach them those things to be sure, but teach them the fear of God.

Teach them the commandments of the Lord. Teach them the gospel of Jesus Christ. Teach them concerning redemption and mercy and grace. Teach them the scriptures, instruction.

That is a primary emphasis in a mother's calling.

Setting an Example

Secondly, she is to set an example for her children. Baxter in his book, The Reformed Pastor, highlights the reality that at times ministers can undo with their lives what they preach in their sermons. I don't think that applies just to ministers. It applies to you men when you're in your workplace.

If you're witnessing to somebody and you're telling them, hey, you ought to come to church, you ought to believe on the Lord Jesus, you ought to walk according to the law of God, and then you go on and you cheat your employer, what have you done? You've undone with your actions what you've preached up with your words. Well, the same is true with our little ones. Ladies, I'm not suggesting you're never going to sin.

I know that you are going to sin, and you're going to say things, and you're going to do things. You're going to set a bad example. But show them as well the example of one who seeks the grace of God. Show them as well the example of one who has redress at the cross.

Show them the example of one who owns their wrongs, who confesses their wrongs, who seeks mercy from God, and even seeks mercy from the children that they have offended. You say, well, I'll lose my authority over them. No, you won't. You'll underscore it.

You'll highlight it. You'll punctuate it. They'll see that you are seeking, by the grace of God, to be what the Bible says. Bridges on 22-6, Train Up a Child and the Way He Should Go, Bridges comments, the mere talk to a child about religion without bringing it to bear upon his loose habits and self-willed tempers is utterly ineffective.

None of us lives to himself alone. We are all spreading around us an influence. We all are spreading around us an influence, whether for good or for evil. Here, therefore, in our families lies the responsibility of Christian consistency.

If the child hears of godliness and sees but wickedness, this is bringing him bread with one hand and poison with the other, beckoning with the hand to heaven and at the same time taking him by the hand and leading him in the way to destruction. Who would receive even the choicest food from a leprous hand?" It's a great illustration. Somebody had a burger in a leprous hand, would you take it out of their hand and eat it? Seriously, I mean, you may be that noble sort out there, I'm not.

Hear what Bridges says, who would take food from a leprous hand? Who's gonna take instruction on religion from a godless mother? He's going to take instruction on religion from a godless father. That's the point.

He says, a child learns more by the eye than by the ear. Imitation is a far more powerful principle than memory. A well-trained child gladly looks to his parents' godliness as his model picture to copy after. A wayward child eagerly seeks for the excuse of his own delinquency, and this discovery and parental example will harden him in infidelity and ungodliness.

Now, you've all heard this before. You've come to somebody and you've reproved them of something and they say, well, what about you? Yeah, you're right. I'm a monster too.

But that doesn't invalidate the reality that you're also a monster. But isn't it powerful and liberating when we don't have to first identify ourselves as monsters? I mean, we are in all those other places, but in this particular instance, by the grace of God, I'm striving to be faithful, and I didn't do this. You did.

You need to own it. Have you ever done that, when somebody's come to reprove you? You say, well, who does he think he is, because I know he does this. It's our tendency.

It's our default. It's what we do. That's what we are. Any excuse we can get for our delinquency, we will use it.

Do not underestimate your sons and your daughters in Adam. What was the first thing Adam and Eve did when they were in sin? They ran and hid. You don't have to tell your kid, when you go do something wrong, run and hide.

They just do it, don't they? Have you noticed you never had to train your kid to say, mine? That the words just form. Mine.

That's mine. You have to teach them share. You have to teach them give. You have to teach them about others, because by default, they're all about mine.

You typically, at least in the Butler home, when our children were little, we didn't have to teach them the word no either. It's like it just blasts right out with perfect ease. Don't underestimate the Adamic nature of your children. And when he says that we look for an excuse of our own delinquency, what excellent means or fodder does a young kid have than to say, well, you do that, mommy, or you do that, daddy?

Again, he still shouldn't do it. But let's not give him the ability to make such an argument.

Discipline and the Rod

Ladies, instruct them. Ladies, set an example for them. Ladies, discipline them. Discipline them.

That doesn't mean just spank them. It means verbal reproof. When you study the Proverbs, you see that emphasis. Verbal reproof.

This is not belittling. This is not shouting. You're not exercising your godly right to engage in verbal reproof by screaming every expletive at them that you've ever heard in your life. It is to correct with the voice.

It is to teach. It is to instruct with an edge. You need to shape them and mold them and direct them, and the verbal use or the means of verbal reproof is right there. The Bible also does enjoin corporal punishment.

The rod and reproof give wisdom. It's an interesting dynamic. Physiologically, God made us in such a way that paying back here somehow manifests wisdom up here. It's great.

It's a wonderful procedure. More parents ought to utilize it. Again, autobiography. When we first got converted, my mother found out that we spanked our children.

She said, how in the world could you spank your children? Almost as if to say, only Satan would do such a thing. And immediately, I got really shaken. I mean, here was the mother that chased me around the house with the yardstick, but that wasn't in anger.

It was more in jest. I said, you know, God says in His Word to do this. And then, with a little bit of courage, I said, Mom, Have you ever realized that when you were a little girl, the biggest things going on in school was running in the hall. Now, I know there were other things, but for the most part, running in the hall, chewing gum in class, talking, having to stay after and write lines on the board.

You know what the biggest things going on in high schools today? Abortion, teen pregnancy, drug use, murder, mayhem, robbery, all manner of crime. I said, what happened when you were little and you got out of line? She said, we got belted.

I said, exactly. We live in a day and age where parental authority is not being exercised. It isn't rocket science. When you raise up miserable people or miserable children, guess what they grow up to be?

Nine times out of 10, they grow up to be miserable adults. Parents, exercise your godly authority in this most necessary element. Yes, verbal reproof, but yes, corporal punishment. Proverbs 13 verse 24.

Texts we should rehearse because unfortunately we have resisted the pressure that these things lay upon us. Proverbs 13, 24. He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly. Proverbs 19, 18. 19, 18.

Chasten your son while there is hope, and do not set your heart on his destruction. Proverbs 20, 30. Blows that hurt cleanse away evil, as do stripes the inner depths of the heart. I think that's the King James rendered, the blueness of the wound does that.

Proverbs 22, verse 15. 2215, foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. Timeouts will always get rid of it. Taking his Nintendo system away will always get rid of it. No.

So the text says, brethren, I'm not advocating child abuse. Anybody that abuses their child is wicked, vile, and godless. But there is a difference between child abuse and the proper administration of biblical justice. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, the rod of correction will drive it far from him." Again, that physiological connection between the backside and the heart.

God has designed us in a marvelous and wonderful way. 23, 13, and 14. Do not withhold correction from a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod and deliver his soul from hell. Proverbs 29, verse 15.

Proverbs 29 verse 15, the rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. Now, parents do not go home and implement the reign of terror. Yeah, we've been negligent in this, so let's get back on it. And the kid looks weird for a moment, and you let him have it.

Parents, be responsible, be consistent, be disciplined in it yourself. Don't go reigns of terror and then let go, and then reigns of terror when you hear a sermon and then let go. Kind of saying that so you kids don't get it when you get home. That's for everything you did and we didn't spank you.

Wait a minute, what's happening here? Well, Pastor Butler said, Pastor Butler did not say it. Pastor Butler says, read the Proverbs and see what Solomon says does have God's sanction in the rearing of your children. Bridges says, the rod without affection is revolting tyranny.

Do not give it out of anger. Give it because of love, because of obedience to Christ, because you want their well-being.

Love for Children

So ladies, instruct them, set an example, discipline, and fourthly and finally, love them. Love them. Isn't that what Paul says in Titus 2, 3 to 5? that they love their children. You say, well, that's a no-brainer.

What woman out there doesn't love her children? Nothing is commanded in the Bible that is extraneous. In other words, there's a reason for the command. The command to a woman to love her children must assume or presuppose or imply that there is somebody out there that will bear forth fruit and not love them.

It took me five minutes to find some examples of mothers who do not love their children. There's a woman in Tampa who just shot her two teenagers. It's not Titus 2 love, is it? There's a woman in Northeast Pennsylvania who beat her 15-year-old child with a baseball bat because of a clogged toilet.

And I'm not sure if you've heard about the situation in Salt Lake City. A boyfriend went to his girlfriend's home, went out into the garage, and found a dead infant in a box. Apparently, this baby was born stillborn, so she put it in a box and put it in the garage. When the boyfriend starts looking around the house, he uncovers six others and six other boxes within the house itself.

These weren't stillborns. She suffocated them or strangled them. So do not say it is normal and natural for every woman to love their children. It is quite insensical that within a country that tolerates abortion, if this lady would have went to a clinic instead of put those babies in boxes, it would have been her choice.

I don't know if you've heard of Emily Letts. Emily Letts just rose to fame. She's a 25-year-old woman that recorded via video cam her abortion. Not from the waist down, mind you, because no one wants to see such grisly things, but from the waist up to say what a positive and a heartwarming experience this has been.

And lest you make the conclusion that Emily Letts was operating under the humanist lie, that it was just a blob of cells, she knew what she was doing. Subsequent to this activity, subsequent to the abortion itself, which is chilling to watch, because about the three-minute mark you realize, as Leon Brown points out in a very excellent article on Reformation 21, you're witnessing a murder! Throughout the stuff of Hollywood, where it's ketchup or whatever they use, you're witnessing a lady that is undergoing the act of murder. So a month later, she's interviewed, still on this video, to say how there's no guilt, there's no shame.

She just feels so good about her decision. And listen to what she has the gall to say. I don't feel sad. I feel in awe that I can make a baby.

I can make a life. She knew what she was doing. So when Paul says, ladies, love your children, do not immediately conclude, well, all women everywhere do. Not all everywhere, not all women everywhere do.

Love them. Why do you instruct them? Why do you model an example to them? Why do you verbally reprove them?

Why do you apply the rod of correction that God says to do? It's because you love them. You will do anything for these children. You will lay down your life for them.

You will give up all of your independence for them. You will give up career. You will give up money making. You will give up all those things that the world holds out to being real fulfillment.

A godly mother who loves her children gives up everything because she loves her children. That's the orbit in which these responsibilities flow. If you love them, you will do these things and you will do them happily. You will do them for the glory of God.

You will do them for the good of these never-dying souls. You will do them because this is your calling under God. Be encouraged. Be strengthened.

Be cheered.

Application: Dependence on God

In closing, ladies, find your dependence upon God. Find your dependence upon God. A woman who fears the Lord. I gotta tell you, as I've lived, and as I've moved, and as I've had my being, there is no task harder than being a mother.

Again, I don't want to glorify you, hey, it's Mother's Day in terms of no Lord's Day. I want to glorify the Lord God Almighty and recognize what He has done in installing motherhood. Again, it's a thankless task, isn't it? How many noses have you wiped?

How many rear ends have you dealt with? How much food have you made? How many times have you answered the same question? You ever just want to say, that's it, I'm never answering this again.

I'm done, I'm filled up. But you know, you'll get up the next morning and you'll answer the same question because you want to honor God and you love that kid. Find your dependence upon the Lord God most high. That needs to be your strength.

Secondly, your encouragement ought to come from husbands. her husband also, and he praises her. Men, do you ever praise your wife? Well, I don't want her to get proud. Go away.

Get serious. It's typically not the problems our dear mothers are dealing with. I'm so proud because all my husband does is praise me. I'm just going to sit around and let him fan me, feed me grapes. serve me." It's not the issue.

What's this husband do? He recognizes the worth, the value, the merit, the strength of his wife, and he praises her. And then he says this, many daughters have done well, like the way the New American Standard renders it. Many daughters have done nobly, but you, honey, excel them all.

Encourage your wives. Help them to find strength Comfort in you. Children ought to encourage their parents or their mothers. It's what Proverbs 31, 28 says, her children rise up and call her blessed.

If you only do that on May 11th in 2014, you've got problems. You need to understand what your mother does and you need to esteem her and thank her. Don't engage in a baseless ingratitude. But ultimately, the encouragement for godly motherhood comes from her God.

Never forget that. Never forget 582. You're not going to go to heaven because you're the mother of the year. You're going to go to heaven because my hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness.

You're not going to go to heaven because you effectively read every theology book out there, and you've inculcated it into the young minds of your six-year-olds, and they're now able to go out and witness to their friends. You're going to go to heaven because, fowl, I too the fountain fly. Wash me, Savior, or I die. Find your encouragement and your comfort in your chair, chiefly and foremostly in the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ.

And ladies, may I say as well, in conclusion, teach the children. Again, 2 plus 2, ABCs, all those things. Teach them quantum physics if you so choose. But do not neglect the law and the gospel.

Do not neglect the truth of God's holy commandments. Do not neglect the role of the law in its various facets and in its various aspects. May I commend to you, sisters, to understand the reform distinction in terms of the threefold use of the law. Teach your children the law in its civil use, its political use, to restrain their vile passions and their evil deeds.

You tell them, you can't do that because God says not to. Use the law as a schoolmaster to lead them to Christ. When you tell them, you must not do that, and they do it, then you tell them the law points you to the Savior. The law shows you your need for the Lord Jesus Christ.

The law shows you that you are dead in your trespasses and sins, and the only way of salvation, hope, and life is by another. And for those children who profess saving faith, those children who believe the gospel, those children who are confessing the good confession, you teach them the normative use of the law. What does God say that Christians ought to do? Not to go and engage in that sort of activity, not to do those sorts of things.

As a Christian believer, young child, you're supposed to be faithful to your Lord. Turretin sums it up this way in terms of the pedagogical, the child tutor function, and the normative. He says, before it, the law was an instrument of the spirit of bondage to throw down and bruise man. But afterwards, it becomes the instrument of the spirit of adoption to promote sanctification.

He says, thus the law leads to Christ, and Christ leads us back to the law. It leads to Christ as the Redeemer, and Christ leads to the law as the leader and director of life. This is what I mean. Ladies, you don't have to study everything out there, but know the law and the gospel.

Know the place of God's holy law. Know that it cannot save your children. Do not say things to your children like, I can't believe it, you actually sinned. What do you mean you can't believe that they actually sinned?

Have you looked at your own heart ever? Have you ever opened the Bible? It should never escape from our mouths. I can't believe that you did that.

I can believe that you did that because the Bible says all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God and there is one alone who is righteous and there is one alone who can save. So not only highlight the law, but brethren, sisters, make sure they understand the gospel. Teach them the cross. Teach them of Jesus.

Teach them of his atonement. Teach them of substitution. Teach them of curse-bearing. You may not get all the concepts.

You may not do it like Berkhoff would do it in his family, but you do it successfully under the power of God's Holy Spirit. You teach them the law, you teach them the gospel, and then you pray at home. God, be merciful. God, bless the Word as it goes forth.

Yes, bathe it all in prayer. Bathe it all at the throne of grace. And I realize that you don't always have hours and hours to do this, that the Bible doesn't specify it has to be hours and hours to do this. Read, pray, attend to the means that God has given for the good of your souls.

So sisters, be encouraged. I hope that you find great blessing. in the task that the Lord has called you to, and I pray and I hope, brothers, that we will encourage our wives, we will be there for them, we will be a means of blessing and not a means of cursing to them. And for those out there that perhaps aren't mothers, those maybe who were hatched and don't even know their mothers, those who maybe everything's gone over your head, that last aspect of the gospel is what I want to leave you with this morning. You see, the reason that we're here today worshiping God is not because we're good.

It's not because we've arrived. It's not because we read the right books, or we responded to the right conference, or we responded to the right thing. We're all sinners. We're all astray.

We're all like sheep. We're all undone. And God, in His mercy and in His grace, grabbed us, saved us, washed us, cleansed us, purified us, and brought us here together. The only way of everlasting life is through Jesus Christ.

It's not through being a good mother. It's not through being a good father. It's not through being a good individual or single person. It is through Christ alone.

That's what I want to leave you with this morning. Think about this. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Every single one in this room is guilty before God.

Every single one of us is liable to the just punishment and condemnation of God Most High, who is holy, holy, holy. And yet God Most High sent His Son into this world, sinners to save. His Son obeyed. His son died, his son rose again, so that everyone who believes in him will have everlasting life.

That is good news.

Closing Prayer

Well, let us close in prayer. Our Father, we thank you for your word and we thank you for its sufficiency and efficiency in all matters of faith and practice. I pray that you would encourage the mothers here, encourage the grandmothers, encourage each and every one of us as we consider your holy word. And Father, help us all to see again the glory of the cross, the glory of Jesus Christ, our Lord and our Savior, that one who lived, who died, and who rose again, so that we might have everlasting life.

Go with us now and grant your peace and your grace and your mercy to your people. Call out of darkness those who are not yet your people, bring them into marvelous light, that they may proclaim the excellencies of the triune God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. And we pray through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture References

• Exodus 20:12
• Leviticus 19:3
• Deuteronomy 5:16
• Proverbs 1:8; 3:7; 6:20; 8:13; 13:24; 14:26; 15:20; 19:18; 19:23; 19:26; 20:20; 20:30; 22:15; 23:13-14; 23:22-25; 29:15; 31:10-31; 31:28; 31:30
• John 3:3; 17:3
• Ephesians 2:8-10; 5:23; 6:2; 6:10
• Titus 2:1; 2:3-5; 2:4; 2:6; 2:11; 2:14
• 1 Timothy 5:3-16
• Hebrews 9:22