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Good evening to everyone. Welcome 
to the House of the Lord. Just one announcement this evening 
before we begin worship, and that is the luncheon will be 
next Sunday. So there will be an email coming 
this week for what you can bring, if you're able to bring anything. 
So again, that's luncheon next Lord's Day. Let's begin our worship 
then by reading from Psalm 113. Psalm 113, as we begin worship 
this evening. The Word of God. Praise the Lord. Praise, O servants of the Lord. 
Praise the name of the Lord. Blessed be the name of the Lord 
from this time forth and forevermore. From the rising of the sun to 
its going down, the Lord's name is to be praised. The Lord is 
high above all nations, his glory above the heavens. Who is like 
the Lord our God who dwells on high, who humbles himself to 
behold the things that are in the heavens and in the earth? 
He raises the poor out of the dust and lifts the needy out 
of the ash heap. that he may seat him with princes, 
with the princes of his people. He grants the barren woman a 
home like a joyful mother of children. Praise the Lord. Let's 
stand and sing together. Our first hymn is 134. 134. Let's 
stand and sing together as a church. through faithful servants of 
the Lord, who in His house do stand by night and praise Him 
there with all glory. ♪ Lift up your heads in prayer 
and draw nigh ♪ ♪ Unto this sanctuary high ♪ ♪ Oh, bless the Lord, 
health, his need ♪ ♪ And worship him, praise his name ♪ love. From Zion in its boundless 
love, our God, who heaven and earth give free, who rest beneath Let's go to our God in prayer. 
Let's pray. Heavenly Father, we rejoice in the fact that we 
can now gather for the worship of the one and only living and 
true God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. We would pray now, Lord 
God, that you would help us by your spirit to hallow your name. 
As we have gathered here for worship, we pray that we would 
reverence you, We pray that we would have that godly and Christian 
fear as we approach the high king of heaven and worship in 
this place and do help us in that worship. We know that we 
need your spirit to worship you are right to worship you in spirit 
and in truth. We pray Lord God that you would 
animate our Christian hearts that we might be filled with 
the spirit in worship that we might honor you. that we might 
sing the praises of our triune God, that we might reflect with 
great joy upon Jesus Christ and the blessed gospel. We do pray 
Lord God as we engage in these elements of worship, the reading 
of the scriptures, the singing of psalms and hymns, the The 
preaching of your holy word in prayer. We do pray in all these 
things, Lord God, that you would be honored and glorified, that 
your people would be strengthened, that you would strengthen us 
by your spirit in our walk with Christ. We do pray that having 
here gathered, we would be all the better to go out into the 
world to preach the Lord Jesus Christ and to shine as lights 
in a crooked and perverse generation. We thank you, Lord God, that 
we can have The word, your revelation to the sons of men, a Bible's 
in our hands. We know that in many other places 
throughout the world, those who are Christians of yours do not 
have this particular honor. So we pray that we would count 
it a high and heavy honor to be able to gather in liberty 
unmolested by the outside world and by the government. We thank 
you that we can be here in this place and worshiping Father, 
Son, and Holy Spirit. We do pray, Lord God, again, 
that you cause us to have sweet contemplations of the gospel 
of saving grace as we've here gathered, not because of us, 
not because of our doings, but because of the doing and dying 
and rising again of the Son of God. We pray that you would impress 
upon us the glories of that gospel, that we would reflect upon so 
great a saviour who came into this world, sinners to save, 
that he lived that perfect life of obedience to your law in the 
stead of all who believe in him, that he died upon Calvary's cross 
and rendered not an atonement of maybe or perhaps but so died 
upon calvary's cross that he might perfectly secure the salvation 
of a multitude which no man can number from every tribe and tongue 
and people and nation we rejoice in that blessed truth and we 
rejoice in the truth that on the third day he rose again in 
power and in great victory and in that is the gospel the doing 
and dying and rising again of the son of god and we thank you 
by amazing and victorious grace you have caused a a multitude 
of people to come from darkness to light, from deadness to life, 
by virtue of the perfection of Jesus Christ and the power of 
the Holy Spirit. And we pray again, as we have 
so gathered, that we would reflect with great joy upon these truths. Do forgive us afresh by virtue 
of the blood, the shed blood of our Savior, the Lord Jesus 
Christ. We thank you that when we sin, we do have an advocate 
with the Father, even Jesus Christ the righteous. We pray, Lord 
God, that you would be with those who are in need of prayer, those 
struggling physically with disease, with injury, with many things 
that we know who are dear to us in this church and even outside 
of our church. We pray that you would strengthen 
them in body, that you would give them confidence and courage 
as they're affected by the physical man. We pray that in the inner 
man, you would cause them to rejoice in Christ, to be resigned 
to your will in all things. to cast their fears upon you 
and to come to you, not to be anxious in anything, but Through 
prayer and supplication, mingled with thanksgiving, they would 
make their requests known to you and find the peace of God. 
We pray, Lord, that you would be with those who we often hear 
of and those we do not hear of in the persecuted church throughout 
this world, where there is much persecution by government and 
countrymen, where they are persecuted, their churches burned down, where 
physical assaults are brought upon them and even When many 
die, Lord God, we do pray that you would be in the midst of 
these communities of Christians, that you would stir them up, 
that you would cause them to lay hold of the faith without 
wavering. We pray that in the midst of 
opposition and tyranny and the anger of venomous opponents, 
that you would Cause them, Lord God, to rest upon you, to be 
courageous for the Lord, and that they would, in the midst 
of all these things, with eyes of faith, lay eyes of faith upon 
the Lord Jesus Christ, ascended at the right hand of the Father, 
ever living to intercede for his people and to judge his enemies. 
We pray that they would have much confidence in the King of 
Kings. We pray for those who rule over us, as we're called 
to pray, Lord God, for those who are kings and those who are 
in positions of authority. We do just pray that you would 
cast down those who rule in wickedness, who call vice virtue and virtue 
vice. We pray that you would cast them 
down, that they might no longer bring violence and impositions 
upon the people of God and rule in wickedness, and we pray, Lord 
God, even against hope, that you would raise up those who 
would rule aright and cause there to be righteousness, equity, 
and justice in the land. We do pray that you would, Lord 
God, now again be with us in worship. We long to be those 
who worship you in spirit and in truth. Please help us to attend 
unto the preaching of the word as Pastor Butler comes up here 
in a number of minutes. We pray that our minds wouldn't 
wander. It's so easy for them to do so. 
We pray that you would cause us not to be carried off by wanderings 
of mind into reflections upon the past week or to think of 
this evening or to think of the next week, but to now be solely 
focused upon the worship of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. that we 
might avail of the preached word and leave this place singing 
your praises. And do be with Pastor Butler as he opens your 
word. We know that ministers rest not upon their own strength, 
but upon the strength that the triune God affords those who 
proclaim the gospel. So give him what he needs to 
open up the word of God and to preach to us richly the things 
of Jesus Christ, our Savior. And it's in his name that we 
pray, amen. Let's stand again and sing. This time it's 158. 
Let's stand and sing 158 together. All the mercies of the Lord, 
give me, O give me, give me a kiss, give me pride of all my tears. ♪ That in the world myself can 
be ♪ ♪ The air I sleep and peace may be ♪ ♪ O may my soul be reborn 
♪ ♪ And this peace be mine nine years' worth ♪ ♪ Take that we 
be born in Christ's name ♪ and because of them, never will 
we desert thy rest. Oh, powers of darkness, we owe 
thee. We'll still sing and never die. There is life above all blessings, 
Lord, praise him above. For our Old Testament scripture 
reading, you can turn with me to Deuteronomy chapter 21. So we work through the Old Testament. 
That's where we're at now. Deuteronomy chapter 21. We'll 
read the entirety of the chapter. Once again, this is the word 
of God. If anyone is found slain lying in the field in the land 
which the Lord your God is giving you to possess, and it is not 
known who killed him, then your elders and your judges shall 
go out and measure the distance from the slain man to the surrounding 
cities. And it shall be that the elders 
of the city nearest to the slain man will take a heifer which 
has not been worked and which has not pulled with a yoke. The 
elders of that city shall bring the heifer down to a valley with 
flowing water, which is neither plowed nor sown, and they shall 
break the heifer's neck there in the valley. Then the priests, 
the sons of Levi, shall come near. For the Lord your God has 
chosen them to minister to him and to bless in the name of the 
Lord. By their word, every controversy and every assault shall be settled. 
And all the elders of that city nearest to the slain man shall 
wash their hands over the heifer whose neck was broken in the 
valley. Then they shall answer and say, our hands have not shed 
this blood, nor have our eyes seen it. Provide atonement, O 
Lord, for your people Israel, whom you have redeemed. And do 
not lay innocent blood to the charge of your people Israel. 
And atonement shall be provided on their behalf for the blood. 
So you shall put away the guilt of innocent blood from among 
you when you do what is right in the sight of the Lord. When 
you go out to war against your enemies, and the Lord your God 
delivers them into your hand and you take them captive and 
you see among the captives a beautiful woman and desire her and would 
take her for your wife. Then you shall bring her home 
to your house and she shall shave her head and trim her nails. 
She shall put off the clothes of her captivity, remain in your 
house and mourn her father and her mother a full month. After 
that, you may go in to tell her and be her husband, and she shall 
be your wife. And it shall be, if you have 
no delight in her, then you shall set her free. But you certainly 
shall not sell her for money. You shall not treat her brutally 
because you have humbled her. If a man has two wives, one loved 
and the other unloved, and they have born him children, both 
the loved and the unloved of the firstborn son is of her who 
is unloved. Then it shall be on the day he 
bequeaths his possessions to his sons that he must not bestow 
firstborn status on the son of the loved wife in preference 
to the son of the unloved, the true firstborn. but he shall 
acknowledge the son of the unloved wife as the firstborn by giving 
him a double portion of all that he has, for he is the beginning 
of his strength, the right of the firstborn is his. If a man 
has a stubborn and rebellious son, who will not obey the voice 
of his father or the voice of his mother, and who, when they 
have chastened him, will not heed them, then his father and 
his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the 
elders of the city, to the gate of this city. And they shall 
say to the elders of his city, this son of ours is stubborn 
and rebellious. He will not obey our voice. He 
is a glutton and a drunkard. Then all the men of his city 
shall stone him to death with stones. So you shall put away 
the evil from among you and all Israel shall hear and fear. If 
a man has committed a sin deserving of death, and he is put to death, 
and you hang him on a tree, his body shall not remain overnight 
on the tree, but you shall surely bury him that day, so that you 
do not defile the land which the Lord your God is giving you 
as an inheritance, for he who is hanged is accursed of God. Amen. Well, just very briefly, 
two wonderful passages that come together by no happy accident 
in the book of Deuteronomy that point forward to the Lord Jesus 
Christ. At the end of that first section, 
we read in verse eight, provide atonement, O Lord, for your people 
Israel, whom you have redeemed. And at the close of this particular 
passage, we have a verse, a section of a verse, a portion of a verse 
that the Apostle Paul cites in Galatians 3.13. when he says 
that Christ has become a curse for us, for cursed is everyone 
who hangs upon a tree. We have this language at the 
end of Deuteronomy 21, for he who is hanged is accursed of 
God. We have this blessed reality 
of atonement provided by God, and atonement provided by one 
who was not deserving of death, who did no sin, who was wholly 
harmless and undefiled, and yet bore the death of sinners having 
the sin of all those whom the father had given to him and imputed 
to him, and he was hanged upon a tree as if accursed of God 
for us. What a beautiful thing that we 
have in the Bibles, the consent of all the parts and the scope 
of the whole, which is to bring glory to God through the salvation 
of sinners. Through this cursed one who hung 
upon a tree, the innocent Savior who gave his life for guilty 
sinners. What a Savior we have in Jesus. Well, let us pray. Heavenly Father, 
we thank you for the truth of your word. We rejoice in what 
you have written to us. And we thank you that page after 
page, chapter after chapter, your word points to Christ upon 
the cross, working out the salvation of men. And we do pray. that 
you'd help us now as we continue in worship, and specifically 
in this central act of worship, the preaching of your word, that 
we would again be found to be in spirit and in truth, worshiping 
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. And we pray in the name of our 
Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, amen. Our final hymn then, before 
the preaching, we'll stand one more time as a church and sing. 
It's 128A, 128A, let's stand and sing together. Oh ♪ And prosper all your days ♪ ♪ 
For white within your house will be ♪ ♪ A white Israel's abode 
♪ Behold, thou shalt come and be 
blessed, who truly fears the Lord. The Lord from Zion gives 
you dear. His mercy can be borne. throughout your days. Jerusalem, prosper well. May through your children's children's 
tears, peace be on Israel. Well, you can turn with me in 
your Bibles to Ephesians 5, or Ephesians 6, as we continue to 
work through Paul's letter to the church in Ephesus. Our focus 
tonight will be verse 4, as we consider the household code beginning 
in chapter 5 at verse 22 and concluding in chapter 6, verse 
9. So I'll just pick up reading in verse 15 of chapter 5 to remind 
us of the context. So Ephesians 5, beginning in 
verse 15. See then that you walk circumspectly, 
not as fools, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are 
evil. Therefore, do not be unwise, but understand what the will 
of the Lord is. And do not be drunk with wine, in which is 
dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another 
in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody 
in your heart to the Lord, giving thanks always for all things 
to God the Father, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting 
to one another in the fear of God. Wives, submit to your own 
husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the 
wife, as also Christ is head of the church, and he is the 
Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church 
is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands 
in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just 
as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her, that 
he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water 
by the word, that he might present her to himself a glorious church, 
not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she 
should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their 
own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 
For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes 
it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of 
his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this reason, a 
man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, 
and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery, 
but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless, 
let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, 
and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Children, 
obey your parents and the Lord, for this is right. Honor your 
father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, 
that it may be well with you and you may live long on the 
earth. And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, 
but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Bondservants, 
be obedient to those who are your masters according to the 
flesh, with fear and trembling, in sincerity of heart as to Christ, 
not with eye service as men pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, 
doing the will of God from the heart, with goodwill doing service 
as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that whatever good anyone 
does, he will receive the same from the Lord, whether he is 
a slave or free. And you masters do the same things 
to them, giving up threatening, knowing that your own master 
also is in heaven, and there is no partiality with him. Amen. Well, let us pray. Our gracious 
God, we thank you for your word. We thank you for this wonderful 
epistle to the Ephesian church. And, by extension, for us here 
now in the 21st century, we pray that the Holy Spirit would guide 
us as we consider this passage. Help us, God, to take seriously 
your admonitions and your exhortations and commandments for life in 
our homes, and give us grace, God in heaven, to to go to the 
Word of God, to go to scriptures, to study them, to see what you 
say concerning the rearing of our children. And God, we thank 
you for the rich heritage that you have given to us. We thank 
you for the many children here. We thank you for the young people. 
We thank you for the babies in the wombs. And God, we just rejoice. We know that this is a good thing. 
The world today says it's a bad thing to continue to have children, 
to populate the earth, but you have called us to be fruitful 
and multiply, and we mark this as evidence of your blessedness 
and of your kindness and of your goodness. Do forgive us now for 
all of our sins. Cause us as fathers, as mothers, 
as parents, grandparents. Give us that remembrance that 
our salvation is ultimately through grace and faith in Christ, and 
not ultimately the way that we perform or the way that we obey. 
But in light of that salvation, help us to implement your truth 
and to be faithful. And we ask in the name and for 
the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen. Well, as we come to this 
practical section of the epistle, I think it's important that we 
don't just look at it as a series of sort of exhortations on behavior 
modification. In other words, we ought not 
to forget chapters 1 and 2 when we consider chapters 4 to 6. 
If you remember, we have doctrine in chapters 1 and 2, very specifically 
how we're saved. It is because of God's sovereign 
grace. He chose us in Him before the 
foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without 
blame. In love, He predestinated us unto adoption as sons. So 
before time began, God ordained the salvation of a great multitude 
that no man can number. In terms of the application of 
that, you see it specifically in chapter 2, verses 1 to 10. We're saved by grace. We're not 
saved by works. We're not saved by our efforts. 
We're not saved by a mingling of our efforts in Christ's work, 
but we're saved by grace alone. That's Paul's emphasis in chapter 
2, verses 1 to 10. So I've mentioned several times, 
chapter 3 is a bit transitional. Paul highlights his role in redemptive 
history. And then in chapter 4, if you 
notice in verse 1, it says, I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech 
you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called. So 
everything that follows in chapters 4 to 6 are sanctification. It's the consequence of God's 
saving grace in our lives. In other words, we're not saved 
because we have performed the way chapters 4 to 6 tell us to, 
but we're saved by grace so that we may perform the way that God 
calls us to. Again, not for salvation, but 
because we are saved in chapters 4 to 6. And remember specifically 
Paul's admonition on a walk, our conversation, the way that 
we conduct ourselves. That's what he says there in 
4.1. I beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you 
were called. And then he gives concrete illustration of that 
in chapter 5. He says we're to walk in love. 
He says we're to walk in light. And then he says we're to walk 
in wisdom. And the walking in wisdom is seen specifically in 
chapter 5, verses 15 to 21. So being filled with the Holy 
Spirit is a mark of the wise man. And being filled with the 
Holy Spirit looks like what he describes after he says, be filled 
with the Spirit. He says, those filled with the 
Spirit will speak to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual 
songs. They will sing and make melody 
in their hearts to the Lord. They will give thanks always 
for all things to God the Father. And they will submit to one another 
in the fear of God. And then that leads naturally 
to what we see or what we've called the household code. So 
in 522 to 619, Paul deals with concrete application. What does 
it look like to walk in love? What does it look like to walk 
in light? What does it look like to walk in wisdom when one is 
filled with the Spirit, submitting to one another in the fear of 
God? He deals first with the husband and wife relationship, 
and then he turns to the parent-child relationship, and then he turns 
to the master-slave relationship. So we're in the child-parent 
relationship, verses 1 to 4. So last time we considered the 
child's responsibility in verses 1 to 3, and tonight we pick up 
the father or the parent's responsibility in verse 4. So I want to look 
first at the responsibility of parents in verse 4 and then a 
description of faithful parents from the book of Proverbs. I 
think Proverbs is most helpful. We need to approach Proverbs 
not just as the collected axioms of the godly man Solomon, but 
Christ as wisdom speaking in his word. So what we find in 
the book of Proverbs is God's inspired revelation on how we're 
supposed to function as the blood-bought children of God in the various 
relationships that we sustain in this present evil age. So 
first, notice the responsibility of parents. I want to look at 
first the background, second the prohibition, and then third 
the exhortation. In terms of the background, this 
is connected to verses 1 to 3. Notice how verse 4 starts off, 
and you. There is a connection there. 
This isn't disassociated from verses 1 to 3. This is strictly 
connected. So when Paul invokes the rightness 
of obedience for children in verse one, I argued there that 
it's a light of nature appeal. It's a general revelation sort 
of a thing. A child owes obedience to its 
parents. That's an axiomatic principle. 
That's a non-negotiable. Even pagans and heathen have 
stumbled upon that reality. Children obey your parents, for 
this is right. The rightness of the principle 
is embedded in us as image of God and as well in the created 
order around us. But it's not only the light of 
nature, it's special revelation that affirms that and Paul appeals 
to that in verses 2 and 3. Notice, honor your father and 
mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be 
well with you and you may live long on the earth. And so when 
he goes on to say in verse four, and you fathers, I think he means 
fathers and mothers, though he could just mean fathers, but 
certainly mothers are involved because they have delegated responsibility 
in the father's absence. But with reference to this, I 
think it's in the context of the fifth commandment, but as 
well, it's in the context of the light of nature. Everybody 
ought to realize that fathers ought not to torture their children. 
Fathers ought not to exasperate their children. Fathers ought 
not to put a stumbling block before their children. The rightness 
of it resonates with even, as I said earlier, heathen and pagan. But specifically the apostle 
has the fifth commandment in mind. So the scope of the fifth 
commandment, I think, is well argued by the Westminster larger 
catechism. In number 124, it says, who are 
meant by father and mother in the fifth commandment? By father 
and mother in the fifth commandment are meant not only natural parents, 
but all superiors in age and gifts, and especially such as, 
by God's ordinance, are over us in place of authority, whether 
in family, church, or commonwealth. So you see, the divines rightly 
understood the fifth commandment applying to children with reference 
to their parents, parents with reference to their children, 
but also in terms of church and in terms of state, the doctrine 
of superiors and inferiors. The Westminster Larger Catechism 
in number 129 goes on to say, what is required of superiors 
toward their inferiors? So last time we looked at the 
inferior toward their superior. And I realize in our sort of 
egalitarian age, those terms are a bit offensive. We don't 
want to make anybody think they're inferior. We don't want to make 
anybody think they're superior. Well, that's not how the divines 
use the language. It meant those who have greater 
responsibility over others who had lesser responsibility. So 
again, in the home, the superior is the parent. The inferior is 
the child. In the church, you've got church 
officers. In the state, you've got governors, you've got kings, 
you've got those in authority, and we are inferiors relative 
to them with reference to their particular power. So it says, 
what is required of superiors toward their inferiors? Answer, 
it is required of superiors and men And women, this is very applicable 
to parenting children, it is required of superiors according 
to that power they receive from God and that relation wherein 
they stand to love, pray for, and bless their inferiors. In 
other words, the reason you're a superior over the inferiors 
is not to exploit them, it's not to hurt them, it's not to 
walk roughshod over them, it's not to keep them down, but rather 
it is for their benefit, it is for their profit, it is for their 
well-being. to love, pray for, and bless 
their inferiors, to instruct, counsel, and admonish them, countenancing, 
commending, and rewarding such as do well, and discountenancing, 
reproving, and chastising such as do ill, protecting and providing 
for them all things necessary for soul and body, and by grave, 
wise, holy, and exemplary carriage to procure glory to God, honor 
to themselves, and so to preserve that authority which God has 
put upon them. So, in other words, when God gives authority in these 
certain contexts, whether it be in the family, whether it 
be in the church, or whether it be in the state or commonwealth, 
as the divines say there, it's not to be abused. It's not to 
be tyrannical. It is not to be despotic. It's 
not to be with an iron fist. Rather, it is in the context 
of love with the desire to see the inferior grow and be healthy 
and be strong and be stable and be secure. We have a perversion 
of authority in all levels of God-given institutions today. We see perversion in the family. We see it in the church. We certainly 
see it in the commonwealth when men who are simply governors 
or elected officials function as kings and queens. There is 
a need to get back to what does scripture say concerning the 
role of superiors and inferior. So the background is the fifth 
commandment. We see that and you fathers connected 
to verses 2 and 3. Now in terms of the prohibition, 
it's simple. You fathers do not provoke your 
children to wrath. Pretty simple, right? Now again, 
we can argue that mothers are included in there. Doesn't mean 
fathers don't provoke your children to wrath, but mom, you go ahead. 
You chase them all over the house, you scream at them, you throw 
things at them, you do all kinds of things to just excite those 
passions. No, no, no, that's not it at 
all. Fathers and mothers. Again, you see the connection 
in verses one to three. Children, obey your parents in 
the Lord, and then honor your father and your mother. So when 
this commandment or this exhortation comes to fathers, it includes 
mothers, and it's very simple. Do not provoke them to wrath. 
Don't mess with them. Don't stir up those negative 
passions. Don't do those things that are 
going to cause them consternation in their life. Why would you 
want to do that? Now, we all have remaining corruption, 
and there might be that time where, you know, we sin and we 
do those things, but as the overarching principle, as superior to an 
inferior, the desire and the design ought to be to promote 
their well-being. So, fathers, do not provoke your 
children to wrath. This is the simple prohibition. 
Now, what are some of the ways that we can do this? Now, I didn't 
read a book here. I mean, I've read commentary. 
Some of this is unfortunately experiential. So, you know, sometimes 
the School of Hard Knocks is the best teacher with reference 
to these particular things. I would suggest first the presence 
of unrighteous anger can provoke a like response from your children. Do not provoke your children 
to wrath. Well, how can we do that? By 
having our own wrath that isn't governed properly, that isn't 
righteous. Turn back for just a moment to 
Ephesians 4 and verse 26. We're told there, be angry and 
do not sin, do not let the sun go down on your wrath. Paul seems 
to envision that there are instances and occasions where persons can 
be angry and not sin. In fact, we have two instances 
in the Gospel account of our Lord Jesus Christ. One concerns 
Sabbath wars when the Pharisees were upset because Jesus was 
going to heal a man on the Sabbath day. It says that He looked at 
them with anger. As well, in John chapter 2, when 
Jesus is cleansing the temple, He's not got a big smile on His 
face. He's not prancing around as He's 
flipping tables over and as He's driving out the beasts. There 
is a sense where one can be angry and not sin. Now, to pursue and 
find that is most certainly a challenge, but God is angry with the wicked 
every day, and He doesn't sin. So, it's not the case that as 
parents you're never going to get angry with your children. 
If you've had children for like 30 seconds, well, not really 
when they're that little, give it till they're 15. And, well, 
even much, much sooner than that. There is a sense where you get 
angry. But this uncontrolled, undisciplined, 
sinful anger is something that is calculated to provoke anger 
in response on the part of your children. I would suggest, secondly, 
the implementation of unbiblical discipline. We're going to end 
on that note tonight. I've often thought this is the 
children's least favorite sermon in the year, because it ends 
on child discipline. But children, may I just say 
that this is a very important thing. If you are an undisciplined 
child, you're gonna be an undisciplined adult. And ask any undisciplined 
adult if that's a happy life. It's not a happy life. The way 
of the transgressor is hard. Discipline helps to mitigate 
that hardness, that discipline helps to form, and that discipline 
helps to bring you to a place where you're a functioning, decent 
member of society. But the implementation of unbiblical 
discipline, You're not authorized to torture your children. You're 
not authorized to mock them. You're not authorized to make 
fun of them. You're not authorized to hurt 
them in an ungodly way. John Eady said, the paternal 
reign is not to be one of terror and stern authority, but of love. 
The rod may be employed, but in reason and moderation, and 
never from momentary impulse and anger. Children are not to 
be moved to wrath by harsh and unreasonable treatment or by 
undue partiality and favoritism. So this use of unbiblical discipline 
is calculated to promote wrath on the part of your children. 
I would suggest, thirdly, the problem of inconsistency. Often 
thought after sermons like this, the parents will impose a reign 
of terror for the coming week. We need to get back the ground 
that we have sacrificed and lost. At least that's what happened 
to us when we were young parents and we had little kids. You know, 
you get into patterns of inconsistency. You don't discipline as you ought. 
And then Pastor Barcelos would preach from Colossians 3 or Ephesians 
5. We'd get home and say, okay, that's it. It's over. You're 
done. There's a new sheriff in town. 
Well, that sort of inconsistency can promote wrath. It can provoke 
the child to wrath. The problem of inconsistency, 
inconsistent application of love. It's always supposed to be the 
orbit of love. You're always supposed to be 
loving towards your children, even when you're angry, even 
when you've got to discipline. That's not done out of the context 
of hate, you do it out of love. As well, inconsistency with reference 
to discipline. You need to be faithful. This 
is a tough lesson for parents to imbibe, but this is the lesson 
we're called to imbibe from Jesus speaking to us in the book of 
Proverbs. We're supposed to be faithful 
and consistent with the discipline of our children. And then I would 
suggest attention, inconsistency with attention. I think that 
Edy touches on that when he says, by undue partiality and favoritism. Jacob didn't do the family any 
good when he favored Joseph. I know there's a lot going on 
in the Joseph narrative. I know there's a lot of wickedness 
in the hearts of the brothers. I know all that. But all things 
being equal, Jacob didn't help the family situation when Joseph 
was his pride and joy. And then when Joseph gets the 
vision from God and he comes back, what does it do? It simply 
outrages and incenses the brothers. And again, I'm not saying the 
brothers were the victims in that story. That's not it at 
all. But there is an undue partiality or favoritism that can provoke 
the other children to wrath. It's not going to provoke the 
one you're favoring. It's not going to provoke the one that 
you give all this attention to. But if that one has siblings, 
guess what's going to be the possible effect upon their young 
psyche? I would suggest as well the imbalance 
with reference to law and gospel. Of course we preach the law to 
our children. Of course we tell them, don't 
steal. Of course we tell them, don't 
lie. Of course we tell them, yes, 
we're going to church. Of course we tell them, no, you're 
not supposed to worship Baal. We certainly speak the truth 
of God's law, but not to the neglect of God's gospel. How 
do you know your sin and misery? The law of God tells me so. Use 
the law that way to show your children the need for the gospel 
of our Lord Jesus Christ. But having taught them the gospel, 
if by grace they confess faith in the gospel, then teach them 
law. Well, not then, always, because 
they've got to maintain that non-stealing of things and non-lying 
about others. So those are just some ways, 
and I'm sure if you're a parent that's been at it any time, you 
could probably add to that list quite a bit. I could too, but 
we don't want to be here all night. And then from the prohibition, 
we then have finally, under the responsibility of parents, the 
exhortation in verse 4b. So you fathers, do not provoke 
your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition 
of the Lord. See, that's gospel sanctification, 
or sanctification which is the consequence of justification. 
When you read the Bible, when you read sanctification passages, 
it's never just put off. Just stop doing that. No, in 
its place, do something good. Right? Go back to chapter 4. 
You see that very vividly displayed. Verse 25, Therefore put away 
lying. Let each one of you speak truth 
with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. So don't 
just not lie, but positively speak the truth. Notice in verse 
27, I'm sorry, verse 28, let him who stole steal no longer. Right? Good counsel, Paul. We need to stop stealing. If 
that's part and parcel of our life before Jesus, then we need 
that admonition to stop stealing. But that's not where he stops. 
Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working 
with his hands what is good, that he may have something to 
give to him who has need. So the dynamic of sanctification 
that we find in the New Testament and the Old Testament as well 
is to put off and to put on. Romans 13, 14, put on the Lord 
Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its 
loss. So not only are you not supposed to provoke your children 
to wrath, but positively this is the exhortation. You're to 
bring them up. You're to nurture them. You're 
to train them in the training and admonition of the Lord. Now 
there is first an emphasis on action. That's that bring them 
up in the training. That's the external, outward 
sort of action emphasis. It simply means education, child 
training, discipline. And then you have an emphasis 
upon the word. So bring them up in the training, 
action, and admonition, word of the Lord. And word here simply 
means encouragement or reproof. You've probably heard the terminology, 
newthetic counseling. Well, it comes from this particular 
Greek word, this idea of admonition, this idea of exhortation, this 
idea of encouragement and reproof. So there is the action, training, 
there is the word, admonition, and then there's the orbit of 
the Lord. Of the Lord means that Christian 
parenting, this is going to be profound, is Christian parenting. In other words, you do this with 
reference to the Lord Jesus Christ. You do this for Him. You do this 
by His instruction. You do this to Him. In other 
words, your children are not ultimately yours. They are your 
stewardship, but everything ultimately belongs to God the Lord. Now, 
they're yours versus the state's. I didn't mean that, I meant that 
they're not all together yours. God owns everything and God has 
called you to steward in a faithful way. And so that faithful way 
means to bring them up in the training and admonition of the 
Lord. Deuteronomy 6, 4-7 captures both of these sentiments, I think, 
very well. So you've got Israel's central 
confession of faith in verse 4. Hear, O Israel, the Lord our 
God, the Lord is one. And then the response to that 
central confession of faith. You shall love the Lord your 
God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your 
strength. And these words which I command 
you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently 
to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your 
house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you 
rise up. See the beautiful consistency 
between the Old and the New Covenants relative to God's design for 
parenting. In other words, God wants His 
image bearers well looked after. If God has blessed you and opened 
the womb and given you a legitimate issue and has blessed you, it 
is your responsibility, my responsibility, to take those gifts, to treat 
them as gifts, and to put into practice the things that God 
calls us to and not to use them for our own sinful desires. Now 
that brings us then to the book of Proverbs, the description 
of a faithful father, specifically, and again, including mothers. 
If you turn to the book of Proverbs, I want to let you just indicate 
four things about a good father, faithful father. The first is 
that the faithful father is a godly man. The faithful father and 
mother are godly people, they're godly parents. Proverbs 1, verse 
7, Notice in 2.5, Chapter 3, verse 7, Do not be wise in your own eyes, 
but fear the Lord and depart from evil. Chapter 9, verse 10, 
the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom and the knowledge of 
the Holy One is understanding. Chapter 14, verse 26. 1426, in the fear of the Lord there 
is strong confidence and his children will have a place of 
refuge. 1533, the fear of the Lord is 
the instruction of wisdom and before honor is humility. And 
then of course, 2813, whoever, he who hides his transgression 
or covers his transgression will not prosper. The one who confesses 
and forsakes it will find mercy. So parents, in order to faithfully 
parent, you need to first and foremost be faithful to God. 
It's a sort of Matthew 6.33 thing. I want to be a good father. I 
want to be a good mother. What do you think's the first 
priority? Read Dr. Spock. Most of you don't probably 
know who Dr. Spock is anymore, but in our 
youth, he was a guru, probably before our time, but you get 
these books on parenting and all that sort of thing. I'm not 
suggesting all that's necessarily bad. I would put it far behind 
Proverbs, but your first orientation is to God. Seek first the kingdom 
of God and his righteousness, and then these things will be 
added to you. In other words, maintaining fidelity 
before the Lord is the primary requisite for every other action 
in life. I always look at life as a priority 
structure. If you're a man, you're a man 
before God first. And then you're a husband to 
your beloved. Then you're a father to your children. Then you're 
a grandfather to your grandchildren. Not grandfather to grandfather. 
Then you're a worker. Then you're a citizen in the 
body politic. We have a marching order. We 
have a priority structure in our lives. Same with women. You're 
a woman before God. You're a wife to your husband. 
You're a mother to your children, a grandmother to your grandchildren. 
Those are the things that we ought to be thinking about. So 
if we're not faithful as a man, how are we going to be faithful 
as a husband? If we're not faithful as a man, how are we going to 
be faithful as a father? If we're not faithful as a man, 
how are we going to be faithful as a grandfather? This is Paul's 
argument for the office of elder in the context of the church 
of the Lord Jesus Christ. 1 Timothy chapter 3, a man must 
be able to rule his own household well. Why? Because if he doesn't 
rule his own house, then how can he steward the church of 
God? It's an argument from the lesser to the greater. If you 
mess up at that level, we're not going to unleash you on the 
church. Paul's logic is impeccable. And so the primary obligation 
or primary responsibility to good and faithful parenting is 
good and faithful living before the Lord God Most High. Secondly, 
the faithful father loves his children. Again, brethren, this, 
pagans get this, right? I mean, how do you not look at 
that little bundle of joy and not love him or her? I'm not 
using that in modern, you know, are we concerned about which, 
it could be a boy, it could be a girl. How do you not? This is a light of nature concern. 
What father doesn't love his children? I know there's beasts 
out there that abuse and torture and engage in all kinds of wickedness, 
but the general overarching rule is that people love their children. And Christian fathers, Christian 
mothers should be animated by that principle of love relative 
to their children. There is a recurring emphasis 
in the book of Proverbs, the constant use, the constant refrain 
by Solomon, my son. What does my son suggest? It suggests intimacy. It suggests 
connection. It suggests love. Over and over 
again, he appeals to his son. Chapter 1, verses 8 to 10. Chapter 
2, verse 1. Chapter 3, verse 1. Chapter 3, verse 11. Chapter 4, verses 
1, 10, and 20. Chapter 5, verses 1 and 7. Chapter 6, verses 1 
and 20. Chapter 7, verses 1 and 24. It indicates the loving nature 
of the relationship between a father and his children. Again, brethren, 
you can argue for discipline, you can argue for admonition 
or instruction, but it's not done by a machine. It's not done 
by, well, I've got to check off this list today, child, so sit 
down. I'm going to give you three Bible verses, give you three 
swats, send you on your way. It's born out of love. You love 
this kid. You want the best for this kid. 
Everything about you is ready to sacrifice for this kid. You're 
willing to die for the kid, and if necessary, willing to kill 
for the kid. And we see that in nature as 
well, don't we? We see animals protect their 
young. We see people, or animals, do things that more people should 
do. We should have more concern, 
more love, more desire for children. This is something that has been 
increasingly more popular today. All the gurus of this age talking 
about depopulation. God says it's a positive good. 
It's a positive benefit. It's a positive blessing to be 
fruitful and multiply. It's anti-Christian sentiment 
that comes along and says, well, no, we've got to reduce the number 
of people. Reduce the number of people? 
People are a blessing. God created the world to people 
it. That's what he did it for. He 
didn't create the environment so we would bow down to it. We're 
not supposed to worship and serve the creature. We're supposed 
to worship and serve the Creator. And the Creator has said, go 
out and be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth. It's a blessing 
and a benefit. And by the way, I'm going to 
put a bunch of oil right in that earth. so I can power the world 
for you, so that you can increase, so that you can abound. I'm going 
to give you wisdom such that men can make air conditioning. 
You'll be able to live in deserts. I'm going to give men wisdom 
so that they'll be able to figure out irrigation systems. No shout 
out to the present workers there, but I'm going to equip the earth 
in such a way that it yields its bounty to you. It's a beautiful 
arrangement. So it's anti-Christian when men 
come along and say, well, we got to depopulate. No, we don't. That is contrary to the word 
of the living and true God. We ought to love children, not 
kill children, not endorse the cutting off of children's parts. 
We ought to endorse the rearing of them in the training and admonition 
of the Lord God Most High. They are wonderful. Now in terms 
of this love to children, it's borne out in two ways. First, 
temporal provision. 1322 in the book of Proverbs. 1322, temporal provision. In 
other words, it's your job to feed them. It's your job to put 
shoes on their feet. It's your job to give them a 
jacket when it's five degrees out. It's your job to have a 
roof over their heads. That's an indicator of love. 
And children, may I say, that's an indicator of love. My dad 
doesn't always do this, that, and the other. Yeah, but he's 
out there working constantly to make sure you've got lights, 
to make sure you've got shoes, to make sure you've got some 
sort of vittles to put down your throat. That's an indicator of 
love. It's a good thing. It's a positive. 
It's a benefit. Notice in 1322, a good man leaves 
an inheritance to his children's children, but the wealth of the 
sinner is stored up for the righteous. Turn over to 27, Proverbs chapter 
27. Again, the man is admonished 
to make sure that he's able to provide for wife and children. We've dealt with providing for 
wife. also includes providing for children. Any children that 
flow from you and your wife's union, your job and your responsibility 
in the context of love is to make sure that they have heat, 
to make sure that they have water. Notice in Proverbs 27 at verse 
23, he says, For riches are not forever, nor 
does a crown endure to all generations. When the hay is removed and the 
tender grass shows itself, and the herbs of the mountains are 
gathered in, the lambs will provide your clothing, the goats the 
price of a field. You shall have enough goat's 
milk for your food, for the food of your household, and the nourishment 
of your maidservants. What does that mean? It means 
what Paul says in 1 Timothy 5, verse 8. If any man does not 
provide for his own, he's worse than an infidel. He's worse than 
an unbeliever. This isn't godly. It isn't righteous. It's not holy. Well, you know, 
I'm just not measured up to my gifts and my abilities. Go flip 
burgers. Whatever puts a roof over your 
head, keeps a coat on your kid's back, whatever's lawful under 
God, is certainly an option. So the temporal provision, but 
as well spiritual. I'm going to argue at the close 
that you need to pray for your children. You need to bring your 
children to church. You need to set up a family altar 
and instruct the children from the word of God. You need to 
do the Deuteronomy 6 thing. When you rise up, when you walk 
by the way, when you lie down, what are you talking about? You're 
talking about the Lord. You're talking about His handiwork and 
general revelation. You're talking about mathematics 
that ultimately comes from God. You're talking about the various 
things that the Lord has given. As the Lord God of truth, you're 
teaching your children those things. But with reference to 
the spiritual provision, listen to Bridges on Proverbs 13, 22. 
We just read it. I'll read it again. And I think 
Bridges has a perceptive statement. So a good man leaves an inheritance 
to his children's children. That might present a little bondage. 
Well, you know, it's tough. The economy's tough. I think 
the economy was probably tough then, too. I mean, you know, 
that's kind of the thing. Yeah, there's been other tough 
economies. I think that's part of the challenge, 
is to try to figure out the endgame around the tough economies, right? You cut corners where you can, 
you turn off the lights, you tell your kids, you know, you 
can't. bask in hot water for 20 minutes, show them an electric 
bill once in a while, and tell them what it costs, and hopefully 
it resonates with them, but there's always been tough economies. 
But there are tough economies, and so Bridges makes this observation. 
He says, if there is no earthly substance to leave, yet a church 
in the house, a family altar, the record of holy example and 
instruction, and above all, a store of believing prayer laid up for 
accomplishment, when we shall be silent in the grave, will 
be an inheritance to our children of inestimable value." That's 
a great application in terms of the spiritual. A good man 
leaves an inheritance to his children's children. That's what 
we often say. We want a church here and, you 
know, a couple more generations. These babies in the womb, when 
they grow up and they get married, wouldn't it be great if they're 
at the Free Grace Baptist Church and Chilliwack on Wellington? 
That'd be great. It'd be wonderful. That's what 
we should have in our view in terms of going forward. Thirdly, 
a faithful father instructs his child. A faithful father and 
mother instructs their children. Any parents biologically can 
produce children. This isn't simply a Christian 
thing, right? You can take the two dumbest 
people on the face of the earth, give them a night away, and they 
can produce children. But that's not what Paul is telling 
us. Bring them up in the training 
and admonition of the Lord. A godly man evangelizes his children 
and trains them in and for the Lord. That's the emphasis that 
you find. You've got, again, the Shema 
in Deuteronomy 6, 4 to 9. Hear, O Israel, the Lord our 
God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your 
God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and you shall teach 
these things diligently to your children. We've got the various 
my son sayings in Proverbs, as I've already alluded to, and 
then the indictment of those who reject parental instruction. 
The guy that Solomon speaks of in the book of Proverbs that 
doesn't listen to his parents, he's not the hero in the book. He's not the wise guy. Well, 
he is a wise guy, but he's not the wise man. He's not the star 
of the show. He's the negative example of 
the fool that hardens his neck to good parental instruction. And then, of course, our New 
Testament emphasis here in Ephesians 6, 4, and then the parallel in 
Colossians 3, 21. Now, I'm not suggesting that 
you need to have family worship that's an hour and a half, and 
you construct a little pulpit in your living room, and the 
children all sit there silently, and they've all got their hymn 
books, and you give them a three-point sermon and four points of application, 
and now it's time to go brush your teeth and get in bed. I'm 
not suggesting that. If you're so inclined and they 
want to deal with it, great, go ahead. But, some sort of instruction. There are the informal, when 
you rise up, when you walk by the way, when you lie down at 
night. There's the informality. There's 
the pointing them to God's creation. There's the pointing them to 
God's gospel. But then there are formal times 
of instruction. Remember, you know, give me the 
Ten Commandments, recite the books of the Bible. What is justification 
by faith? These are things that you want 
to try to inculcate in your children. Remember, it's in the training 
and admonition of the Lord. If they have a propensity to 
go on to fix refrigerators and you can't do that, That's okay. But you should be able to pass 
on the doctrine of justification by faith alone. You should be 
able to give them at least a rudimentary understanding of the triune God. You should be able to emphasize 
the divinity and humanity of our Lord Jesus Christ. You ought 
to be able to see the connection between, but the difference between, 
the law and the gospel. The law is not the gospel. The 
gospel is not the law. But they are inextricably connected 
in terms of law leads to Christ. Christ then sends you back to 
law. So those things are things that ought to be taught to the 
children. Bring them up in the training and admonition, the 
encouragement, the admonition, the reproof of God's holy word. And then that brings us finally 
to the faithful father or faithful parents discipline their children. So remember the two elements 
involved. Discipline of children involves word. That's discipline 
as well. When you instruct, when you command, 
when you exhort, when you rebuke, when you reproof. Those things 
are disciplinary in nature. It's discipleshipping. It's giving 
them that formative sort of grounding in scripture. But then there 
is the discipline that involves act. And the Proverbs are not 
silent here. Again, brethren, this is just 
based out of personal experience and observation. We've got a 
problem in society today. We have a big problem in society 
today at the level of superiors and inferiors. We've got a big 
problem at the level of inferiors responding to their superiors 
in a way that God commands. What's God say when an old man 
enters into a building? You rise up in the presence of 
a hoary hat. I mean, you probably see, like 
I do, on social media, you know, guys on a train, and they won't 
give up a seat to a pregnant woman. That's just bestial behavior. I mean, like, guys, train your 
sons to defer, to open doors, to give a, you know, the seat 
to the old lady that's hunched over. I don't know what happened. I guess the further we slide 
into depravity and wretchedness and wickedness, this is gonna 
be symptomatic of it, a generation where there's just no decency 
whatsoever. So the act of disciplining your 
children, again, born out of love, out of a desire for their 
well-being, Solomon's not silent here. First of all, we have the 
emphasis in Proverbs 29, 15. You can turn there. Just one 
statement, just sort of an overarching thought. Proverbs 29.15. And both elements are here. The 
rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings 
shame to his mother. Isn't that just so simple and 
profound and sublime all at the same time? It's just, it's amazing. 
Do you ever see those videos where guys are fighting each 
other on a subway car? If you were mom or dad and you 
were watching that on the news, would you go, well, that's my 
boy. I'm sure proud of him. No. You'd say, what is he doing? Why is he fighting on a subway? 
Now, if he's defending the weak, great. He's making sure a pregnant 
woman gets a seat, awesome. But if they're just dummies fighting 
on a subway car, what parent in their heart just rejoices 
at the good job they've done? You see, Solomon speaks like 
a real man to real men. The rod and rebute give wisdom, 
but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. You mean 
that's actually sort of motivation in terms of child behavior that 
they not shame their mothers? Yes, absolutely. You're not supposed to bring 
a blight upon the family name. That's a good sort of impetus 
for you to go out and not act like a knucklehead. That is okay. But then notice the two elements, 
the rod and rebuke. The rebuke is the admonition 
of the Lord. The rod is the act, it's the 
training, it's the paideia. Now Bridges here again, specifically 
on not only using the rod. So you can get imbalanced. This 
is another way to provoke your children to wrath. The overarching 
tendency in the book of Proverbs is on reproof. I'm not suggesting 
not Rod, Rod is there. Rod is sort of the biblical nomenclature 
for some sort of corporal punishment, some sort of causation of a degree 
of pain, not abuse, not torture, not send them to the emergency 
because you had a fit of rage, but some sort of corrective discipline 
applied. As I said, the reproof seems 
to be the overarching concern and that's what Bridges speaks 
to here. He says, yet let it not be used at all times, talking 
about the rod. Let remonstrance first be tried. Our Heavenly Father never stirs 
the rod with His children if His gentle voice of instruction 
prevailed. There's sort of a hierarchy here, 
right? Try to win them with words. Try 
to admonish them, correct their behavior with encouragement. 
If that wins them, then no need for the rod, right? That's what 
he's saying. He goes on to say, continual 
fault finding, applying correction to every slip of childish trifling 
or troublesome thoughtlessness would soon bring a callous deadness 
to all sense of shame. Let it be reserved at least in 
its more serious forms for willfulness. It is medicine, not food, the 
remedy for the occasional disease of the Constitution, not the 
daily regimen for life and nourishment. And to convert medicine into 
daily food gradually destroys its remedial qualities. In other 
words, out of the context of love, reprove, admonish, exhort, 
encourage, rebuke. But if that does not, I don't 
want to say work, because that's probably not the best way to 
look at it, but if it doesn't work, then God has given you 
the rod. Now in terms of some governing 
presuppositions, I realize this is a hot topic. Biblical discipline 
is not child torture. Biblical discipline is not child 
abuse. Now, our modern culture interprets 
it this way. So may I just encourage you to 
be very wise, to be very, very wise, to be very, very cautious 
that you don't get arrested or brought up on charges for whooping 
your child. You've got to be able to obey 
the Bible in whatever context you live in. But as Jesus says, 
we need to be wise, cunning as serpents, and we need to be gentle 
as doves. We need to be able to navigate in a hostile environment, 
obeying God's words, and I think that requires a great degree 
of judiciousness and wisdom. But in terms of just some overarching 
reminders, the home is the basic or fundamental place for passing 
on values. Turn back to the section of scripture 
that Cam read for our scripture reading this evening. I was wondering 
if he was gonna comment on verses 18 to 21. But in 18 to 21, we 
see something of this. Now, this is an extreme sort 
of a situation, and it's dealing with an adult rebel son. We know 
that because two-year-olds aren't gluttonous and drunkards. But 
notice in verse 18, if a man has a stubborn and rebellious 
son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of 
his mother, See, in this instance, delivering him up to the elders 
in the city is the last resort. What's the supposition? The family, 
the parents have exercised this discipline in the context of 
the home. So if a man has a stubborn and 
a rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father 
or the voice of his mother, and who, when they have chastened 
him, will not heed them, Then his father and his mother shall 
take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his city, 
to the gate of his city. And they shall say to the elders 
of his city, the son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He 
will not obey our voice. He is a glutton and a drunkard. 
Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death with 
stones. So you shall put away the evil from among you and all 
Israel shall hear in fear. That last bit is not really relevant 
because I'm not suggesting that, but I am suggesting that the 
parental exercise of chastening and reproof took place in the 
home. That's the fundamental. That's 
the foundational orbit for child training. They're not products 
of the state. We don't share the job with the 
civil government. It is the job of the parents. As well, the parents are committed 
to the law of God and the reality, again, governing presupposition, 
that folly is bound up in the child's heart and that more than 
just words at times is necessary to drive it out. Solomon says 
that, Proverbs 22, 15. Foolishness is bound up in the 
heart of a child. The rod of correction will drive 
it from him. I think the simple principle 
is consequences for bad behavior. I know that seems so counterintuitive. You mean we shouldn't just let 
people in California shoplift up to $950 every day? We should just let people do 
that all the time and somehow think that's going to help society? 
No, there needs to be consequences. There needs to be negative sanctions. 
God's word is filled with that. And again, be judicious, be wise, 
make sure that you're operating in a manner that is consistent 
with overarching Christian wisdom. But in terms of some specific 
texts in Proverbs, we've got Proverbs chapter four. We see 
that it begins early. Proverbs chapter four, specifically 
at verse three. Again, this isn't the rod aspect, 
but it's the training. Proverbs 4.3, when I was my father's 
son, tender and the only one in the sight of my mother, he 
also taught me and said to me, let your heart retain my words, 
keep my commands and live. Get wisdom, get understanding, 
do not forget nor turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not 
forsake her and she will preserve you. Love her and she will keep 
you. Wisdom is the principle thing, 
therefore get wisdom. He says, when I was a little 
guy, I was just a little kid and my father would instruct 
me in these things. You can see similarly 1918, 2011, 
and 2026. Bridges makes the comment, Satan 
begins with the infant in arms. The cry of passion is his first 
stir of the native corruption. Do we begin as early? Every vice 
commences in the nursery. The great secret is to establish 
authority in the dawn of life, to bend the tender twig before 
the knotty oak is beyond our power. Again, it's sort of intuitive. You've got these children. God's 
given them. He's also given you a book. He said, you know, you've 
got the Holy Spirit now. You've been justified freely 
by my grace. Here's what I want. I don't want you to provoke them 
to wrath. I want you to bring them up in the training and admonition 
of the Lord. Well, how do I know what that means? Well, I've given 
you the book of Proverbs. Go to the book of Proverbs and 
it gives you that instruction. Do it early, do it consistently, 
do it faithfully, do it prayerfully, but do it. Reprove them, correct 
them, teach them, and instruct them. We see in the Bible that 
the neglect of corporal punishment is ungodly. Remember the case 
of Eli? Eli in 1 Samuel chapter 2 and 
3. He had two sons that were priests. 
And the problem with these two sons is in 2.12. It says they 
did not know Yahweh. That doesn't mean they didn't 
have a cognitive understanding that Yahweh was the God of Israel. 
They didn't know him experientially. What did that lead to with them? 
They lay with temple prostitutes and they stole sacrifices. You 
would be a worshiper, you'd bring your meat to give it up to God, 
and what would they do? They'd take a prong or a fork 
and throw it in there, pull it out, and they would take that 
home and eat. You know what that did to the worshiper? It caused 
them to despise the offering of God. Why should I bring my 
offering to God if these two low-life priests are going to 
just grab it and take it and go home and eat? So these guys 
were wretched. They were bad. So when God speaks 
to Samuel, it's first and foremost to deal with Eli. And in 3.13, 
God says, I have told him that I will judge his house forever 
for the iniquity which he knows, because his sons made themselves 
vile and he did not restrain them. What's the implication? He should have restrained them. 
He should have exercised that parental discipline over his 
children. So you've got train early, you've 
got train consistently, you've got neglect the training of it 
is ungodly, and then as I mentioned earlier, and I want to end here 
before some practical thoughts, the necessary qualification is 
be wise, be judicious. Waltke says, the cleansing rod 
must be applied with warmth, affection, and respect for the 
youth. Warmth and affection, not steely 
discipline, characterize the father's lectures. Parents who 
brutalize their children cannot hide behind the rod doctrine. 
of Proverbs. This is not abuse. It's not torture. 
It's not designed to break the will of your children or break 
the back of your children, but to form their will so that they 
don't continue in willfulness. Well, in conclusion, just a few 
exhortations for the brothers and the mothers, or brothers 
and the wives. The book of Proverbs, along with 
the New Testament epistles, are very helpful here. Very helpful. And again, it's not just a collection 
of maxims that Solomon sort of observed. All scripture is given 
by inspiration of God. The Spirit of God is speaking 
to us in the Proverbs. The Spirit of God is speaking 
to us as parents in the book of Proverbs. We need to listen. 
So the book of Proverbs is most helpful. The grace of God and 
wisdom from God are necessary, ultimately, to comply with this 
material. And as well, never forget Proverbs 
28, 13. If you cover your transgression, 
if you hide it, you're not going to prosper. I think godly parenting 
at times looks like godly parents confessing their own sins to 
their children. I messed up. I shouldn't have done that. That 
was wrong. Oh, well, that'll show my weakness. Well, that's 
good. They need to see that once in 
a while. It will show your need for the gospel of Jesus Christ. 
It will show your need and dependence upon the blood of the lamb. That's 
always a good lesson to communicate to fellow sinners, and in the 
context of the home, it's valuable. Now, with reference to children, 
I would suggest that we pray for them. That should just, again, 
be a no-brainer. If dogs could pray, they'd pray 
for their puppies. If cats could pray, they'd pray 
for their kittens. It's just built in. You just 
love the spawn. And as a result, you pray for 
them so that they'll turn out in a way that is pleasing and 
glorifying to God. Pray for them. Provide for them. 1 Timothy 5.8. Protect them. Protect them. That's a big one 
today, because there's a lot of sort of competing interests 
for your children. And oftentimes it comes through 
that cell phone, or it comes through that internet. You need 
to protect them. You need to preach to them. Again, 
you don't necessarily need to put a pulpit in your living room, 
but preach law and gospel to them. And I would suggest as 
well, be present for them. Now, I know brothers, sisters, 
there's a lot of hard work in here, and that's a blessing. 
It's a good thing, a hard work ethic, right? But you've heard 
that, well, it's not about quantity time, it's about quality time. 
Eh, it's quantity, too. Bring them when you paint the 
fence. Bring them when you clean the garage. Make them help you 
clean the garage. Quantity time, spend time with 
your children. Again, if dogs could do this 
and they had their pups, they would. This is just a no-brainer. 
This is inherent in us as people who have little children. We 
want to be with them. And then I would suggest to young 
men. I would suggest if you're a young man or a young woman 
looking for somebody of the opposite sex in which to marry, I would 
suggest first the need to prepare yourself. This kind of visits 
back to what we did in Husbands and Wives. There is a biological 
factor. You can produce children. I mean, 
all things being equal, God has made us in such a way that biologically, 
male and female coming together can produce children. But there's 
more to Christian parenting than just producing children, just 
contributing the necessary DNA to make another human being. 
As well, there is a soteriological reality. We cannot save our children, 
but we can certainly use the means that God's ordained to 
bring them into contact with our blessed Savior. Bring them 
to church, bring them to the family altar, preach them the 
truth of God's holy word, God's holy gospel. And as well, with 
reference to theology, the father should impart wisdom to children 
on how to function in God's world. I saw a funny meme on on Twitter, 
and I sent it to my son, he's an accountant, and it said something 
to the effect that, I'm so glad that in school they taught me 
about parallelograms and not taxes. It really helps me during 
this busy parallelogram season. Kind of funny, right? When you were a kid, you said, 
what use does this have? You were probably right. I'm 
sorry, but a lot of stuff that we learned as kids, much better 
to learn about debt, about mortgages, about taxes, about hard work, 
about showing up on time, you know, real practical stuff like 
walking and chewing gum, that would be much more profitable 
than probably half of the curriculum taught in status schools today. So fathers understanding that, 
Teach your kids good stuff. That's a blessing. Impart to 
them wisdom. If you are skilled at automotive 
mechanics, get them in the garage with you and show them how to 
do that stuff. This is good as parents to pass 
on information to our children that's actually useful information. And I would suggest that when 
you're searching for Mr. Right or for Mrs. Right, the 
necessity is to find someone who is first converted to Christ, 
but then secondly committed to the word of Christ. I'm not sure 
the second necessarily follows. It should, but it doesn't always. Somebody can be converted and 
have about that deep of a theology. If you want to rear children 
the way that God calls you to rear children, you better understand 
it's not a spectator sport. It's warfare, baby. It's battles 
each and every day. And if you're going into those 
trenches, you better lock arms with somebody who's got the same 
mindset and is ready to win. and is ready to be victorious, 
and is ready to press the gospel of Jesus Christ upon these children, 
such that they could rise up with Mrs. Spurgeon, who said 
to her own children, if on the day of judgment you are on the 
opposite side of Jesus Christ, I will stand with him to condemn 
you, because I did my part, and I exhorted you constantly to 
flee to the Lord Jesus Christ. Brethren, rearing children is 
not child's play. Just because you can do it doesn't 
necessarily mean you're going to be good at it. If you've got 
the Holy Spirit, you're washed in the blood of Jesus Christ, 
and you go to the scriptures with a humble attitude to learn 
in order to pass down information, that's the vantage point wherein 
I think God blesses. It's not formulaic. I did everything 
right and my son wandered off. Well, what's the argument? Don't 
do everything right? I mean, he could still wander 
off. The bottom line is we obey God because God calls us to do 
so and we see the great heritage that we have in our children 
and we seek to bring them up in God's way. Well, let us pray. 
Our Father in heaven, we thank you for your word. We thank you 
that it's so clear and it's so beautiful and wonderful and the 
wisdom that we find here, contrary to what we witness in our present 
evil age. God, what a lamentable fact that 
persons have disregarded, people have ran from the Holy Scriptures 
when it comes to these things. God, help it to not be the case 
among us. Help us to be faithful with reference 
to your word. I pray for all of the young families 
here, for the husbands, the wives, the fathers, the mothers, that 
you would just grant them with grace and strength and perseverance 
and with great joy. All of this is a wonderful, joyful, 
and beautiful thing to seek by your grace to bring up our children 
in the training and admonition of the Lord. We ask that you 
would go with us now, watch over us in this coming week, and we 
pray in the name and for the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. 
Amen. We'll close with a brief time 
of meditation.