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to the book of Ephesians as we 
work our way through Ephesians chapter 4. Our focus tonight 
will be verses 49 to 32. Ephesians 4, 29 to 32, but I'll 
read beginning in verse 17. Beginning in verse 17, Paul writes, 
this I say therefore, and testify in the Lord that you should no 
longer walk as the rest of the Gentiles walk, in the futility 
of their mind, having their understanding darkened, being alienated from 
the life of God, because of the ignorance that is in them, because 
of the blindness of their heart, who, being past feeling, have 
given themselves over to lewdness, to work all uncleanness with 
greediness. But you have not so learned Christ, 
if indeed you have heard him and have been taught by him as 
the truth is in Jesus, that you put off concerning your former 
conduct the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful 
lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that 
you put on the new man which was created according to God 
in true righteousness and holiness. Therefore, putting away lying, 
let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor, for we are 
members of one another. Be angry and do not sin. Do not 
let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil. 
Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working 
with his hands what is good, that he may have something to 
give him who has need. Let no corrupt word proceed out 
of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that 
it may impart grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit 
of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let 
all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be 
put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, 
forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Amen. Well, let us pray. Our Father 
in Heaven, we thank You for Your Word. We thank You that it is 
the authoritative and infallible and inherent Word of our blessed 
God. We confess that concerning Genesis to Revelation. We thank 
You as well for this letter to the Ephesians with reference 
to the doctrine of our salvation. We thank You that it's by grace 
alone, through faith alone, in Jesus Christ alone. And we know 
that when that happens, when that obtains, there will be sanctification. There will be consequences as 
a result. So God, help us to receive these things tonight. 
Help us to watch our conduct in light of a thrice-holy God. 
Help us to live in a manner that is consistent with our high calling 
in the Lord Jesus Christ. Forgive us for all of our sin. 
Certainly, as we read Scripture, just the bare reading of it, 
we are found out, we are convicted, we see that our righteousness 
is not always what it ought to be, our pursuit of those things 
that are above are not always what they ought to be. So cleanse 
us in that precious blood of the Lamb even now, and guide 
us by the Holy Spirit, and we pray through Jesus Christ our 
Lord. Amen. Well, as we have seen, the apostle 
has set forth the doctrine of salvation in chapters one to 
three. And then here in chapter four, if you notice at verse 
one, he says, I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech 
you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called. He 
then digresses in terms of gospel ministry, the purposes for or 
the purpose of the gifts that Christ has given to the church. 
That takes him to verse 16. And then in verse 17, he starts 
to get real practical with the people of God. And remember specifically, 
he bids us not to walk like the Gentiles. He tells us that very 
clearly in verses 17 to 19. Our nature, or rather our conduct 
is not to be like it was. We have been saved. What we were 
is no longer the case. We have that before picture in 
Ephesians 2, 1 to 3. And then we have that emphasis 
on but God in verses 4 to 10. So God has saved us. So don't go backwards in your 
life. Don't go back to that Gentile 
behavior. but rather shun it, avoid it, and resist it. And 
then in verses 20 to 24, he's not giving imperatives. He's 
not saying, I want you to put off the old man. I want you to 
be renewed in the spirit of your mind by way of command, and I 
want you to put on the new man. These are things that God has 
done. This is the indicative. This is what has happened to 
us by God's grace. The old man has been put off, 
we're being renewed in the spirit of our minds by the Holy Spirit, 
and we have by grace put on the new man. And then that last section 
there in verse 24 seems to allude to covenantal categories. We 
might say that all these characteristics that were symptomatic of the 
old man characterize our life in Adam. And then these things 
that are true of the new man characterize our life in Christ 
Jesus. And you see that sort of creation 
motif there in verse 24. And that you put on the new man, 
which was created according to God in true righteousness and 
holiness. So God, according to Solomon, 
made man upright, but they sought out many devices, according to 
Ecclesiastes 7.29. So Adam was made in a particular 
way. He had a righteousness and he had a holiness, but he forfeit 
that by sinning against God, by taking from the tree of the 
knowledge of good and evil. There was a positive commandment 
there, there was a prohibition, it was a covenant of works, and 
Adam, of course, transgressed. But as a result of the last Adam, 
by God's grace now, the old man has been put off, the new man 
has been put on, and we are being renewed in the spirit of our 
mind. So that's the characteristics of the new man. Specifically, 
there are verses 20 to 24. And it's in that context now 
that he gives commands, or he gives imperatives, or he tells 
us how we are to live. So he's not scolding the people 
of God. He's not lecturing the people 
of God. He's not using the law unlawfully. He is not using it in a legalistic 
manner, but rather in light of the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, 
in light of your regeneration by the power of the Spirit, in 
light of the fact that you've been justified freely by his 
grace through faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, this is the conduct 
that is characteristic of your walk now in our Lord Jesus. I 
mentioned verse 1. We are to walk worthy of the 
calling with which we were called. And so in verses 25 to 32, he 
gets very practical in describing the conduct of the new man. And 
it's a structurally sound argument. He first deals with the prohibited 
actions in verses 25 to 28. We saw that last week. don't 
lie, don't engage in a sinful anger which could lead to murderous 
thoughts, and don't engage in theft. And then structurally 
within each one of these commands or exhortations, he gives a prohibition, 
he gives an exhortation, and then he gives motivation. And 
of course the prohibition is consistent with the putting off 
of the old man, the exhortation is consistent with the putting 
on of the new man, and then the motivation is the reason why 
or rationale as to why we do these things. So tonight we move 
to the prohibited speech in verses 29 to 30, and then the prohibited 
disposition in verses 31 and 32. And it's the same structure. You have a prohibition, you have 
an exhortation, and then you have a motivation in each of 
these subsections. So let's take up first this prohibited 
speech in verses 29 to 30. Notice the prohibition. It's 
very simple. Verse 29a, let no corrupt word proceed out of your 
mouth. We all know that intuitively, 
don't we? We're not supposed to speak those things that are 
bad. We're not to engage in obscenity. We're not to use our mouths or 
our tongues as instruments of unrighteousness. And in terms 
of using our mouths, notice he's already addressed that in verse 
25. Therefore, putting away lying, 
certainly a violation in terms of our mouth. Notice that in 
chapter 4, verse 15, he envisages the church to be that body of 
people that speak the truth in love. And in Colossians 3, which 
is very similar in nature to what we find here in Ephesians 
chapter 4, same sort of emphasis. Let no corrupt word proceed out 
of your mouth. Now, this particular word that 
he uses here, corrupt, it's used elsewhere in the New Testament 
with a similar but not altogether the same meaning. It means spoiled 
or rotten. And it's used with reference 
to fish or fruit or other products that can rot. So let no rotten 
word proceed out of your mouth. Let no corrupt word proceed out 
of your mouth. Let no putrid word proceed out 
of your mouth. In this particular instance, 
it's bad or unwholesome to the extent of being harmful. And 
notice the generality of it. Now the apostle does not shrink 
back from denouncing gossip, or slander, or backbiting, or 
whispering. In what we call vice lists in 
the New Testament, lists of various sins and transgressions of God's 
law, the apostle marshals together the argument that these sins 
of the tongue are an offense to a thrice holy God. We're not 
to backbite, we're not to gossip, we're not to slander, and all 
of that is encompassed by this general term, let no rotten word 
proceed out of your mouth. Let no unwholesome word proceed 
out of your mouth. And if we look at it in terms 
of the particular context, we see the balance or the contrast. 
Notice in verse 29, let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth. 
And then he goes on to say, and we'll see this in more detail 
in a moment, but what is good for necessary edification. So 
we might say that the unwholesome words, the harmful words, the 
bad words, yes, again, obscenity and things that we ought not 
to utter, but it's those things that tear down. It's those things 
that destroy. It's those things that decimate. 
It's those things that are calculated to do harm to our brothers and 
sisters in Jesus Christ. And as we move through the context, 
we'll notice the motivation in this particular prohibition is 
found in verse 30. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit 
of God. If you were to ask a hundred Christians, what kind of sins 
are they that grieve the Holy Spirit of God? I would bet that 
a lot of Christians, if they weren't thinking about Ephesians 
4, they'd say, well, adultery. That really has to grieve the 
Holy Spirit. And I would certainly argue that 
it does. They'd say murder, that really has to grieve the Holy 
Spirit. Going down to Walmart and stealing 
things, that really must grieve the Holy Spirit of God. But notice 
what the context demands in terms of understanding what it is to 
grieve the Holy Spirit. This isn't the sin that the pagan 
engages in. This isn't the sin of the heathen. 
This isn't the sin of the man outside the context of the church. 
In the context of the church of the Lord Jesus Christ, it's 
these unwholesome words. It's this tearing down. It's 
this harmful speech. It's this gossip. It's this character 
assassination. It's this slander. It's this 
backbiting. It's this whispering. In other 
words, we can grieve the Holy Spirit of God Most High by the 
way that we talk to one another. And so the apostle says, as new 
men in Christ Jesus, you need to put that to death. That kind 
of language is consistent with the old man. That kind of language 
is consistent with Adam the first. That kind of language is consistent 
with those who don't care about God and who don't care about 
others. One man, one commentator says, 
although this term can refer to that which is spoiled or rotten 
or putrid, in this context, the term is used figuratively to 
refer to that which is harmful and tears down instead of building 
up. There are a few proverbs that 
go in this particular direction. Proverbs 10, 11. The mouth of 
the righteous is a well of life, but violence covers the mouth 
of the wicked. Again, I think at times we don't 
really understand how bad that our words can be. And again, 
I'm not just speaking about the obscenities that we might utter, 
the curse words that we might say, but the way that we tear 
other people down. As well, Proverbs 10, 31 and 
32, the mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but the 
perverse tongue will be cut out. The lips of the righteous know 
what is acceptable, but the mouth of the wicked what is perverse. 
Proverbs 13, 3, he who guards his mouth preserves his life, 
but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction. In other 
words, Solomon says, if you've got a big mouth, destruction 
is in your future. If you've got a big mouth, destruction 
is part and parcel of not controlling your tongue. Proverbs 15, 2, 
the tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools 
pours forth foolishness. So obviously, the connection 
with this prohibition to the immediate context, let no corrupt 
word proceed out of your mouth. Why? Because that is the kind 
of language that is consistent with the old man. And by the 
grace of God, that old man has been put off. By the grace of 
God, you are to put on the new man that doesn't engage in that 
sort of talk, that doesn't engage in that sort of character assassination. So that's the prohibition. Let 
no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth. Then notice the exhortation. So put off, put on. Put off, 
put on. That's the dynamic in the life 
of sanctification. Put on the Lord Jesus Christ 
and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts. Those 
who simply put off are not necessarily Christians. There's people all 
over the earth today that are stopping to drink to drunkenness 
on a regular basis. There's people that are stopping 
crack cocaine. There are people that are stopping 
prostitution. They're putting off, but that's 
not the dynamic involved in sanctification. It's a put off those wicked things, 
but put on those things that God has commanded. Put on those 
things that God has said. In chapter 4 at verse 25, put 
away lying and speak truth to one another. Verse 26, be angry, 
do not sin. Verse 28, let him who stole steal 
no longer, but rather let him labor, and then give to those 
who stand in need. So the dynamic in sanctification 
is to put off those sins and to put on righteousness. And 
so you see that here in 29b. So the exhortation is, but what 
is good for necessary edification that it may impart grace to the 
hearers? Beautiful thing, isn't it? Not 
tear down people, but rather build up people. And we see for 
the apostle Paul that edification or building up is very important. Look back to chapter four at 
verse 12. Remember the reasons why Jesus 
gave gifts to the church. Verse 12, for the equipping of 
the saints, for the work of ministry, for, notice, the edifying of 
the body of Christ. The ministry is to have a positive 
impact on the people of God, not to tear them down, not to 
destroy them, not to bring reproach upon the name of Jesus, but rather 
to edify and build them up. And then drop down to verse 16, 
from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every 
joint supplies, according to the effective working by which 
every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying 
of itself in love. You see, the gospel ministry 
exists for the edification of the saints. The saints exist 
for the edification of the saints. Let no corrupt word proceed from 
your mouth but that which is for necessary edification. Build 
them up. Encourage them. Help them impart 
grace to the hearers. Notice that emphasis there in 
verse 29. But what is good for necessary 
edification or building up that it may impart grace to the hearers? Now, when I was a kid, my mother 
used to have a saying. I'm sure that all of you when 
you were kids had mothers that had a similar saying. And I hope 
that you mothers today have the same saying and you pass it on 
to your spawn. And it's simply this. If you 
don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Pretty simple, isn't it? If you 
don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Really? I'm the only guy that got that 
counsel or advice? My mom was the unique snowflake 
in the history of the world that came up with that? It's a no-brainer, 
brethren. This is Paul's point. If we can 
read between the lines, it's a very simple principle. If you 
don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all. But see, even that falls short 
of sanctification in terms of Christ's people who have been 
justified freely by His grace. It's not the case that we have 
this mandate to not say anything at all. We have a positive exhortation 
to speak those things for necessary edification, so that we may impart 
grace to the hearers, so that we may do them positive good, 
so that we may be a means of blessing in their lives. Again, 
the Proverbs, Proverbs 12, 25. Anxiety in the heart of man causes 
depression, but a good word makes it glad. You know what doesn't 
make it glad? Knuckle under, pal. This is life. It's just a hard sled. You gotta 
deal with it. Buck up, pal, and get it together. That's not going to typically 
heal the depression or the anxiety in the heart of your fellow. 
It's not normally calculated to do him good. It's not unto 
necessary edification, the impartation of grace to the hearer, or to 
mock him, or to condemn him, or to say little trivial things 
to make him feel like he's even worse than he already is. Somebody's 
in the bottom of a hole, you don't tell them, you know, just 
dig your way out, pal. You know, you gotta claw your 
way out, try harder. You maybe try to help him, you 
try to offer some assistance, you try to impart some grace. 
Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, but a good word makes 
it glad. A good word. What was Job's complaint 
with his friends? Y'all just need to let me vent 
here. If I could summarize Job, if 
I could just sort of whittle it all down, there's a time when 
a man just needs to vent, and he doesn't need 15 hours of lecture 
on why he's in the condition he's in. I mean, there may be 
a time for that, and there certainly is. There's a place for that, 
and there certainly is. But when you're in the bottom 
of a hole, the last thing you need are 15 lessons on why you're 
in the bottom of the hole, and 25 lessons on how you can achieve 
success once you're out of the hole. Now, just come into the 
hole and cry with me. Come into the hole and help me. 
Proverbs 15, 23, a man has joy by the answer of his mouth, and 
a word spoken in due season, how good it is. So remember Paul, 
let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good 
for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. But again, 1523 in the Proverbs, 
a man has joy by the answer of his mouth and a word spoken in 
due season. How good it is, isn't it? It 
was just that word. It was just that encouragement. 
It was that bit of necessary edification. It was that impartation 
of grace. When Paul says, impart grace 
to the hearers, he doesn't mean that we have salvific grace. He doesn't mean we have the unmerited 
favor of God. We're not the God of Ephesians 
1-7, that we've been redeemed by His blood according to the 
riches of His grace, but this grace to the hearers, imparting 
grace to the hearers means benevolence and kindness and goodness. It 
is the contrast to the tearing down, the destructive tendency, 
the lack of edification. Proverbs 16-24, pleasant words 
are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the 
bones. Now, I like to think about this particular passage in the 
context of marriage. My beloved might think he doesn't 
think about it enough in the context of marriage, but it does 
come up occasionally in my mind concerning the context of marriage. 
Think about marriage. We love each other. We're one 
flesh with one another. We're as close as humanly possible. In that context, let no corrupt 
speech flow from your mouth. Let no corrupt word proceed from 
your mouth. But what is good for necessary 
edification that it may impart grace to the hearers? Whatever 
the particular context is, these are rules to live by. These are 
things that the Apostle says are indicative of the new man 
in Jesus Christ. Proverbs 25, 11, and 12. A word 
fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. Like 
an earring of gold and an ornament of fine gold is a wise rebuker 
to an obedient ear. Why do you think Solomon says 
wise rebuker? Because there's probably likely 
a lot of unwise rebukers. Hey, I see you're in the hole 
down there. Too bad for you. I'm sure it 
was all those stupid decisions that you made that landed you 
in that hole. When you get out of that hole, 
call me and we'll have coffee. No, a wise rebuker is a blessing. A wise rebuker is an encouragement. A wise rebuker is a gift to the 
church. Bridges, in his commentary on 
the book of Proverbs, says a well-disciplined tongue is a great blessing in 
the life of the church. A well-disciplined tongue is 
a great blessing in the life of the church. So again, let 
no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth. It's a comprehensive 
term. It certainly includes gossip. It includes slander. It includes 
backbiting. It includes evil speaking that's 
referenced to specifically in verse 31. So the prohibition, 
the exhortation, then notice in verse 30 the motivation. the 
motivation, and do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by whom 
you were sealed for the day of redemption." There's a lot going 
on in this particular verse. First of all, notice the language 
used. The word grief assumes or presupposes fluctuation. The word grief assumes or presupposes 
movement from one state to another. So a person is not grieved, something 
happens to them, and now they are grieved. So are we saying 
that the Holy Spirit moves about? Are we saying that the Holy Spirit 
can be prevailed upon? Are we saying that the Holy Spirit 
is kind of like us? He goes from a state of not being 
grieved to a state of being grieved. I think John Gill is absolutely 
right. And this is said of him by anthropopathy and supposes 
something done that is offensive to him. If you're new with us 
and you don't know what that word anthropopathy means, that's 
okay. I'm going to explain it. There's something that the Bible 
uses called anthropomorphism. You say, great, now two words 
I don't know. How helpful is that? Defining 
a word I don't know by another word that I don't know? Well, 
anthropomorphism is typically more common. The Bible speaks of the eyes 
of the Lord are in every place. The Bible speaks of the right 
hand of God. The Bible speaks in terms of 
human language applied to our God. Now, in terms of God, God 
is spirit and does not have a body like men. We've got that definitionally 
by Jesus Christ in John 4, 24. God is spirit. Well, if he's 
spirit, that means he's immaterial. He's not extended into space. 
That means he doesn't have arms. He doesn't have eyes. Well, what 
the Bible does is it accommodates us. The Bible accommodates us. Because we are finite, and it's 
tough for us to understand the infinite, impossible at some 
level, the Bible uses analogy. And so it says of God that he 
has eyes. It says of God that he has hands. 
It says of God that he has a mighty right arm. These are anthropomorphisms. the assertion of bodily parts 
to God. Not to say that God has bodily 
parts, but to say that God is like this. It's an analogy. It 
is a creaturely analogy, so we can learn something of our Creator. 
Anthropopathy, or anthropopathism, refers to feelings, and emotions, 
and the inner turmoil that you and I experience. So when we 
go from a state of non-grief to grief, there's movement. And so when we read a passage 
like this, we need to understand what the apostle is doing and 
what he's not doing. He's not doing this kind of theology. The Spirit was happy until you 
said a bad thing to your wife, and now the Spirit is sad. That's 
not what he's saying. He is saying that there is an 
offense that is happening in the church that brings this to 
the Spirit. That brings this, what we call 
grief, offense, some sort of transgression to the Holy Spirit. So again, Gill says, this is 
said of him by anthropopathy, and supposes something done that 
is offensive to him. If you want the technical language, 
this is called an improper predication concerning God. If you want more 
information about this, then please email Cam, and he'll tell 
you all about it. So that's the language, but then 
notice the theology that's assumed. If we can grieve the Holy Spirit, 
what does that teach us about the Holy Spirit? It teaches us 
that Jehovah's Witnesses are wrong. Jehovah's Witnesses depersonalize 
the Holy Spirit of God. Jehovah's Witnesses, and not 
just Jehovah's Witnesses, I'm just picking on them because 
they're low-hanging fruit, but they say that Holy Spirit, they 
say it, Holy Spirit, they don't even use the article, Holy Spirit, 
never the Holy Spirit, it's Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit is God's 
active force. God's active force that depersonalizes 
the third person of our blessed triune God. We're not supposed 
to do that. In a parallel passage, or somewhat 
similar, we have in 1 Thessalonians 5, do not quench the Spirit. Here we have do not grieve the 
Spirit. In Acts chapter 5, Peter's sin, 
or not Peter, but Ananias and Sapphira, the sin that Peter 
calls out, is that they lied to the Holy Spirit. What does 
that assume, or what does that presuppose? It presupposes or 
assumes the personhood of the Holy Spirit. He's not just the 
active force of God Most High. As well, notice the effect. The 
effect explains. So verse 30, do not grieve the 
Holy Spirit. What does that mean, do not grieve 
the Holy Spirit? What is the effect of that grieving 
of the Holy Spirit? When we engage in this kind of 
conduct, or we engage in this kind of talk, What's the net 
effect? Again, Gil, I think, is hopeful, 
and his being grieved appears by his departure from that. Now, 
that doesn't mean absolutely positively, which is to be perceived 
by the darkness of their souls, the prevailings of corruption, 
the weakness of grace, and their backwardness to duty. I think 
that's legit. When we engage in sin, when we 
let corrupt speech flow from our mouths, when we don't build 
people up, when we don't impart grace to the hearers, what happens? Are we happy, holy, healthy, 
and righteous? Absolutely not. When we grieve 
the Holy Spirit, there are effects upon us as a result of that. A fourth observation on this 
statement, do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, is that it 
is something that is reminiscent of an event that happened in 
Israel's history. In Isaiah the prophet, in chapter 
63, verse 10, we read this specifically. This is rehearsing the the Israelites 
that had been redeemed. Notice the language of redemption 
in verse 30, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 
Redemption in the New Testament has a great big background in 
terms of redemption from Egypt by God concerning the Israelites. So God redeems the children of 
Israel out of Egypt. They go out into the wilderness 
and what do they do? Do they have prayer meetings all the 
time? Do they sing hymns of praise to God all the time? Are they 
constantly expressing their gratitude to God? Are they on their faces 
before Yahweh saying, thank you for bringing us out of that land 
of misery? No, they whine. They complain. They grumble. And so when we 
read in the prophet Isaiah 63 10, they rebelled and grieved 
his Holy Spirit. So he turned himself against 
them as an enemy and he fought against them. There's a parallel 
to this in Psalm 78 verses 17 to 20. The Israelites had been 
redeemed. The Israelites were supposed 
to be grateful, but instead they engage in whining. And in one 
particular aspect, we see it in Exodus chapter 15. They whine 
for water. They moan for water. They want 
water. The place is called merah, bitterness. When Paul, or dropping down, 
when we get specifically to verse 30, notice the first word that 
we're supposed to avoid. I'm sorry, verse 31. Let all 
bitterness. So Paul has a backdrop of Old 
Covenant religion, and he is using those themes, and he is 
using that language, and he is using that concept for the New 
Covenant Israel, for the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ. In 
some sense, there's great discontinuity, but in another sense, there is 
some continuity. You get a bunch of people together, 
and what happens? They typically whine. Get a bunch 
of people together, they typically complain. Get a bunch of people 
together, they talk negatively toward one another. Get a bunch 
of people together, they don't speak those words that impart 
grace to one another. There is that consistency between 
Old Covenant Israel and New Covenant Israel. And then, as I said earlier, 
the context considered. When you think of grieving the 
Holy Spirit, is it corrupt speech? Really? That's grieving the Spirit? Yes, according to the Apostle 
Paul, we think it's the big benchmark sins. We think it's the big transgression 
of, you know, murder and adultery and theft. We think it's, you 
know, idolatry. And again, I'm not suggesting 
that these things aren't an offense to the Holy Spirit of God, but 
in this particular context, it's the sins of our tongue. And then 
notice the motivation celebrated. Verse 30. Do not grieve the Holy 
Spirit of God. Look at what he ends up with. 
By whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. This is language 
we've already seen in Ephesians 1. You can turn there. Verses 
13 and 14 concerning the Holy Spirit. in him you also trusted after 
you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, 
in whom also having believed, you were sealed with the Holy 
Spirit, a promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance 
until the redemption of the purchased possession to the praise of his 
glory." There's a similar convention used in 2 Corinthians 1, verse 
22, and here specifically, notice Paul's argument. Do not grieve 
the Holy Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the day of 
redemption. The idea is not, do not grieve the Holy Spirit 
of God or you'll be cut off. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit 
of God because you'll be cast away into hell. Do not grieve 
the Holy Spirit of God because if you do, I'm going to tell 
you this, you're not going to make it into heaven. Off you 
go into the fiery pit, wretch. That's not what he says. Do not 
grieve the Holy Spirit by whom you have been sealed for the 
day of redemption. And again, put redemption in 
the context of the putting off and the putting on, the new creation 
that we will one day enter into fully. We've tasted it a bit, 
we have already enjoyed it, but it's not yet been fully exposed 
in terms of the consummate glory of God. Warfield said, men may 
think that stronger appeal might be based on fear, lest we fall 
from the Spirit's keeping. As if Paul should have said, 
because you can be kept only by the Spirit, beware, lest you 
grieve him away by sinning. But Paul's actual appeal is not 
to fear, but to gratitude. Isn't that interesting? Guilt, 
grace, gratitude. Maybe the Reformed tradition 
was on to something. You think? He says, because you 
have been sealed by the Spirit unto the day of redemption, see 
to it that you do not grieve the Spirit who has done so much 
for you. See, this is why Paul is not 
a scolding, legalistic preacher. This is why Paul cannot be conceived 
of as the guy shaking or wagging his finger in your face, telling 
you to have no fun. Paul is saying you have been 
blessed with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places 
in Christ Jesus. which includes the sealing of 
the Spirit unto the day of redemption. You have tasted of the age to 
come, but you've not yet fully entered into what there is in 
store. Based on that blessed reality, live in such a way that 
you don't tear down your fellows with your tongue, but rather 
build them up, impart grace to the hearers. Use your words in 
a manner that is consistent with new men and new women in Christ 
Jesus. Now notice the prohibited disposition 
in verses 31 to 32. Where do lying, anger, and theft 
come from? Where do corrupt speech, or where 
does corrupt speech come from? Well, turn for just a moment 
to the Gospel of Matthew, Matthew chapter 15. Excuse me, Matthew 
chapter 15, you have that instance where the Lord Jesus is dealing 
with I almost said his favorite people, but our favorite people, 
the Pharisees, those healthy, wonderful humans. And they're 
upset that his disciples did not wash their hands before they 
ate. And they weren't COVID sort of 
animated, well, you gotta wash your hands, you're gonna get 
the Rona. No, no, no, it was defilement. And then notice what 
Jesus says in verse 11 in Matthew 15. Not what goes into the mouth 
defiles a man, but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles 
a man. Then his disciples came and said to him, do you know 
that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this saying? 
But he answered and said, every plant which my heavenly father 
has not planted will be uprooted. Let them alone. That's pretty 
powerful, isn't it? Let them alone. Leave those guys 
alone. But Lord, leave them alone. He 
says, they are blind leaders of the blind, and if the blind 
leads the blind, both will fall into a ditch. Notice that. The 
man following the blind man doesn't get to plead ignorance. I didn't 
know he was blind. If I hadn't followed the blind 
man, I wouldn't have followed. No, no, no. Both will fall into 
the ditch. There's no sort of lack of responsibility. I was just the follower. Followers 
are supposed to be bright enough to follow those who lead well. 
Followers are supposed to be bright enough that they don't 
hitch their wagon to some pony that's gonna take them right 
to the pit of hell. The blind leading the blind both fall into 
the pit. Now notice in verse 15, Peter 
answered and said to him, explain this parable to us. So Jesus 
said, are you also still without understanding? Do you not yet 
understand that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach 
and is eliminated? But those things which proceed 
out of the mouth come from the heart and they defile a man. 
For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, 
fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies. These are the things 
which defile a man, but to eat with unwashed hands does not 
defile a man." So going back to Ephesians 4, we ought to surmise 
that in this prohibited disposition section, Paul is not simply calling 
for behavior modification. Paul is not a 20th century psychologist 
that's okay with you just getting it together externally. Just 
don't lie. Just don't engage in sinful anger. Just don't engage in theft. Just 
kill those externals. He's not, you know, my mom. If 
you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at 
all. He's not about simple externals, but he goes to the heart of the 
issue. the disposition of our heart, the disposition of the 
inner man. This is consistent with the old man being put off 
and the new man being put on. See, regeneration, the work of 
God's grace, is extensive. It's not just behavior modification. Just stop smoking crack and you're 
going to go to heaven. No, that's not what the emphasis 
is in the scripture. You should stop smoking crack 
because it's bad for you, and it's certainly not going to help 
you in any sense, shape, or form, but it's not that means by which 
you enter into heaven. So it's not just behavior modification 
in terms of the externals and in terms of the tongue. Notice 
he deals with the heart. Notice in verse 31, let all bitterness, 
wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you 
with all malice." Notice that language, put away from you. These are things symptomatic 
of the old man. The old man has been put off. 
If there's these things remaining, you need to kill them. You're 
prohibited from having these sorts of thoughts. And what do 
we see with reference to bitterness? We see the state of being bitter 
in an effective sense. Animosity, anger, harshness. Bitterness is never bueno, brethren. Bitterness never helps anybody, 
does it? Bitterness doesn't destroy the 
person you're bitter at. Bitterness always destroys you. It's like trying to deal with 
the problems of another person by stabbing yourself. It just 
doesn't make sense. It's just not the proper way 
to proceed. So Paul says, do not let bitterness 
fester. If there's bitterness in your 
heart to a brother or a sister, what's the biblical response 
or remedy? Go to Him. Deal with Him. Love Him. Reconcile with Him. Bury the hatchet with Him. Not 
in His head, but in terms of the proverbial saying, so that 
you don't have this outstanding problem. Bitterness affects in 
a very negative way. But then notice, He doesn't stop 
there. Let all bitterness, wrath. Wrath is a state of intense displeasure, 
indignation. You see overlap and a bit of 
distinction in each of the words. And then he goes on to say anger. 
So let all bitterness, wrath, and anger. We must have to interpret 
this as unwarranted anger because back in verse 26, he says, be 
angry and do not sin. So there is a type of anger, 
albeit there's a small margin for error, there is a type of 
anger that a Christian can harbor that's not necessarily sinful. 
We have the two instances in the gospel records in Mark chapter 
3. Jesus looks at the Pharisees who are upset that he healed 
a man, and he has anger with them. He's grieved with them. 
And when he's flipping tables over in the temple, he's probably 
not whistling zippity-doo-dah. He's angry. He's showing and 
expressing that righteous indignation. Psalm 711, God is angry with 
the wicked every day. But if you do not deal with that 
anger, what happens? Oh, everything's going to be 
fine. Everything's going to be great. I'm constructed in such 
a way that I could just be angry and bitter and wrathful, and 
it's no big deal. Now, according to Paul, this 
is conduct or disposition that is associated with the old man. 
That old man's dead. You're a new man in Christ Jesus. 
Guess what's not consistent with the new man in Christ Jesus? 
Bitterness, wrath, anger, and then he says clamor. What's clamor? 
It means to yell. It means to actually express 
what's in your heart in a way that is ungodly. It is unholy. And as I'm preaching this, I'm 
mindful that I am certainly not a perfect being. Notice this 
language of clamor. It is a loud cry, a shout, shouting 
or clamor of excited persons. And then that leads to evil speaking. And I think Lincoln, in his commentary, 
A.T. Lincoln sort of brings these 
things to a connection. He says, within the comprehensive 
listing, there is a progression from anger's inner center, bitterness. and then it moves through its 
initial eruption, wrath, and then there's this steady festering 
in anger to its initial expression, clamor, and then the damaging 
of others by evil speaking. So you see what happens. If you 
are not living in a manner that is consistent with new men and 
new women in Christ Jesus, if you entertain for a time this 
bitterness and this wrath and this anger, and then you let 
fly in clamor and evil speaking, you are guilty. You are living 
like an old man that is not in Jesus Christ. So this is conduct 
becoming the new man. And so by God's grace, we need 
to put it to death. We need to put it away. But notice, 
it's not just the put off, it's not just the disregard or get 
rid of, but note the positive exhortation. So in the absence 
of bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking, 
we put all that off with the old man. What do we put on in 
terms of the new man? Well, it's pretty simple. Not 
bitterness, not wrath, not anger, not clamor, and not evil speaking. Paul summarizes it here very 
effectively. Be kind to one another. Right? It's not rocket science, 
brethren. As I mentioned last week in conversation 
with one of the brothers in the church, New Testament ethics 
isn't something brand new. No, I can't believe. I'm not 
supposed to hate my brother in my heart. I'm supposed to be 
kind to him? No, what God instituted at creation 
in terms of righteousness and holiness, which was forfeit by 
the last Adam, is recovered by the, or forfeit by the first 
Adam, is recovered by the last Adam. When that old man is put 
off and the new man is put on, then guess what happens? Not 
a new body of ethics, not a brand new code, but we get what the 
word of God has always said, but internalized by the power 
of the Holy Spirit. And now there's a willingness 
by us to comply with it. It's a wonderful dynamic. So 
be kind to one another and then tender hearted. The language 
suggests bowels. from your bowels, have this sort 
of an attitude toward your fellows. You see that sort of convention 
applied or predicated of God. There's this bowels of mercy 
sort of emphasis throughout Scripture relative to God. Well, we are 
to be kind to one another. We are to be tenderhearted. And, 
you know, he kind of leaves those terms out there. So, okay, kindness. What does that mean? I should 
say hi to people. I should smile at people. Tenderhearted? Well, 
I should care about people. I should pray for people. I should 
try to do things for people. I should try to serve people. 
But in the absence of any specific referent in terms of what were 
to do kindly or what were to do with tender affection, we 
have this specific emphasis on forgiving one another. See, this 
is contrary to bitterness, this is contrary to wrath, this is 
contrary to anger, this is contrary to clamor, and this is contrary 
to evil speaking. It's unavoidable, brethren, unavoidable. that there's going to be problems 
in the church. I can't believe brother so-and-so sinned against 
me. You know, if you say that to 
me, do you know what I'm actually thinking? I'm probably going 
to be nicer in the way that I approach it, but I'm actually thinking, 
how can you not believe that? Do you not sin against people? 
Do you not have issues? Do you always speak everything 
positively in love? I can't believe sister whoever 
did what she did. Really? You can't believe it? In light of the Bible that has 
King David? In light of the Bible that has 
the Apostle Peter? In light of the Bible that has 
perfectly apt descriptions of you and I? You can't believe 
it? Offenses will come. Trials and 
hardships among God's people obtain. Difficulties are introduced. Sin is a reality, remaining corruption, 
prone to wander, prone to leave the God we love. But what do 
we do from time to time? We tear each other down. We say 
things we ought not. So what's the response? Be bitter 
at them. Avoid them like the plague. clamor, 
yell at them, and speak evil about them. And oh, by the way, 
make sure you tell everybody they know how bad they are, because 
that's always a positive step in the right direction. You know, 
just go and gossip all about them. Take your intimate inner 
dealings and just bring it to bear on everybody that's associated 
with the situation. Because you know what? That really 
pleases the Holy Spirit. He's going to be so happy that 
you shared that in the prayer meeting that you're probably 
going to see revival and the latter day glory. No, that's 
not what happens. That's not what happens. Look 
at what he says. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, 
forgiving one another. John Edie said, Faults will be 
committed, and offenses must come. But believers are to forgive 
them, are not to exaggerate them, but to cover them up from view 
by throwing over them the mantle of universal charity. Amen, John 
Eady. He's aping or imitating 1 Peter 
4, 7. Have fervent love for one another, 
for love will cover a multitude of sins. See, this is where the 
proof is in the pudding. I'm kind. I'm tender-hearted. You should just see how great 
I am. But I'm not going to forgive that guy. Not going to forgive 
that girl. Then guess what? Genius, you're 
not kind and you're not tender-hearted because this is what shows it. This is what demonstrates it. 
This is what puts it into play. And I was going to go, I don't 
want to go too far, too long, but Matthew 18, you should go 
there later and look at the pursuit of reconciliation in Matthew 
18, 15 to 20. It's the instruction of our Savior 
on discipline. If your brother sins against 
you, go to him. If he hears you, then you've 
won your brother, praise God. If he doesn't hear you, take 
two or three witnesses. If he doesn't hear them, tell 
it to the church. If he doesn't listen to the church, then treat 
him as a tax collector and a heathen. That's the process, not bitterness, 
wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking. There's a judicial, 
biblical, legal principle involved. But then after that statement, 
Jesus illustrates forgiveness. Actually, we're going to look. 
Matthew 18. This illustrates the point beautifully. Matthew chapter 18. Look at verse 
21. Then Peter came to him and said, 
Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive 
him? Up to seven times. Probably Peter thought he was 
being very large hearted. Up to seven times, Lord? We know 
the response of our Lord, but the illustration that he gives 
is beautiful. Jesus said to him, I do not say 
to you up to seven times, but up to 70 times, seven. Now even 
in that, he's not telling you to get your iPhone out and make 
sure you don't exceed seven times. That's it, you're done. We finally reached the threshold, 
I'm done, it's over. I don't have to forgive you anymore. 
It is hyperbolic, it is a figure of speech, it is metaphorical 
to say, you don't put a cap on forgiveness. Now, this is coming 
out of the passage on church discipline. You've probably heard 
people say, church discipline, excommunication, what an unloving 
process. What's church discipline calculated 
to promote? Repentance, forgiveness, right 
standing, stability, life of the church, no gangrene, spreading 
amongst the membership. So Jesus demonstrates the benevolence. Verse 23, therefore the kingdom 
of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts 
with his servants. And when he had begun to settle accounts, 
one was brought to him and owed him 10,000 talents. But as he 
was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold with 
his wife and children, and all that he had, and that payment 
be made. The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, 
Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all. Then 
the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released 
him, and forgave him the debt. But that servant went out and 
found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. And he laid hands on him and 
took him by the throat, saying, Pay me what you owe. So his fellow 
servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, Have 
patience with me, and I will pay you all. And he would not, 
but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. 
So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were 
very grieved and came and told their master all that had been 
done. Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, 
You wicked servant, I forgave you all that debt because you 
begged me. Should you not also have had 
compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you? And 
his master was angry and delivered him to the torturers until he 
should pay all that was due to him. Brethren, I'm not a rocket 
scientist, and I'm not big on all that's involved in penal 
sanction and torture and that sort of thing, but I've got to 
think it's hard to make money to pay back a debt when you're 
being tortured. That's what verse 34 says. His master was angry and delivered 
him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to 
him. It's not going to stop! How's 
he going to go out and make money when he's being tortured? Now 
notice the implication, or notice the lesson, and it's what we're 
going to end with tonight in Ephesians 4. So my Heavenly Father 
also will do to you if each of you from his heart does not forgive 
his brother his trespasses. Now back to Ephesians 4. Notice 
that that is the motivation. So he says, be kind to one another, 
tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ 
forgave you. Now don't make the mistake in 
Matthew 18 to assume that we're not going to go to heaven or 
we're not going to be forgiven unless we first forget. In other 
words, it's a quid pro quo. I forgive others, and then God 
forgives me. That's not the teaching of the 
text. The teaching of the text is that the forgiveness that 
we exercise to our fellows is a consequence of the forgiveness 
that we have received from God Most High. In other words, I 
don't forgive others so that I may go to heaven. I forgive 
others because I am going to heaven. I don't forgive others 
so that God will forgive me. I forgive others because God 
has forgiven me. Again, we're not preaching or 
teaching or saying, behavior modification, works righteousness, 
earn your salvation. Paul ends on that note in this 
section, be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one 
another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Gordon Clark made 
this observation, when we stop to consider how the offended 
God forgave our sins by the death of his son, we must be as hard 
as a rock not to forgive a fellow church member whose sin against 
us is so small when compared to our sin against God. He's 
right. Even as God in Christ forgave 
you, grudge-holding, grudge-bearing Christians, who are filled with 
bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking, 
are not living in a manner consistent with the new man. They're living 
in a manner consistent with the old man. This is not appropriate 
disposition in terms of the lives of God's people. So we're to 
put off, we're to put on. And the motivation is that God 
in Christ has forgiven us. So in conclusion, the actions 
that are consistent with the new man, the old man lies, the 
new man speaks the truth. The old man engages in murderous 
rage. The new man puts that to death. 
He seeks reconciliation. The old man steals. The new man 
works hard and is charitable to others. With reference to 
the sins of the Tang, the old man spoke corrupt speech. The 
old man poured out. The old man destroyed. The old 
man decimated. So what does the new man do? 
He speaks those things unto necessary edification. He imparts grace 
to the hearers. He does this in his church. He 
does this in his family. He does this in his society. 
This is not case-specific only in the church, but outside you're 
free to do whatever you want. No, new men in Christ Jesus are 
new men in Christ Jesus. As well, the inner disposition 
that is consistent with the new man is that we put to death the 
bitterness, the wrath, and the anger, and that we, by God's 
grace, implement kindness, tenderheartedness, and we exercise forgiveness one 
to another. Now, if it's the sort of sin 
that brings great reproach upon the name of the Savior, if it's 
not the sort of sin that we can just sort of let love cover, 
well, then we take the process seriously. We deal in terms of 
Matthew 18. I'm not suggesting that for every 
violation or transgression or infraction that obtains in the 
lives of God's people in their home, they need to come to the 
elders with everything. My husband just won't put his 
socks in the hamper. He's a pig. He's a beast. Well, 
sister, that might be one of those things you just need to 
let love cover it. But if the sister comes and says, 
my husband went and committed adultery, we implement the procedure. We implement the process. We 
do what God has called us to do. We're not to be cowardice. 
Well, we don't want to actually go and try to seek reconciliation. 
So we'll just gossip about them, we'll just slander them, and 
we'll just let bitterness fester in our hearts. That is ungodly 
behavior. It is inconsistent with the new 
man in Christ Jesus, and Paul demands, Paul exhorts, and Paul 
commands, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, that we live 
differently. We live in a manner that is consistent 
with what is characteristic of new men and women in Christ Jesus. 
Not so that we will be saved. This section is not teaching 
that. Do this for salvation. There 
is an order. Ephesians 1 and 2 precede Ephesians 
4 to 6. Ephesians 1 and 2 answer the 
question, how am I saved? By grace alone, through faith 
alone, in Christ alone. Chapters 4 to 6 answer the question, 
How now shall I live? By putting to death these deeds 
that are consistent with the old man and putting on the righteousness 
that is consistent with the new man. And you have the Spirit, 
you have the Word, you have one another, you have sufficient 
resources to do all that God calls you to do. Well, let us 
pray. Our Father in heaven, we thank 
you for your word. We thank you for this section 
in Ephesians and the emphasis on practical Christianity. And 
God, we pray for the spirits enabling power in our lives so 
that we would refrain from the actions condemned here, from 
the speech condemned here, and from the disposition condemned 
here. And that we would, by grace, put on those things that are 
consistent with our blessed Savior, our Lord Jesus Christ, those 
things associated with new creation. And God, help us to persevere. 
Help us to bring glory and honor and praise unto you. And we ask 
through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen. We'll close with a brief 
time of meditation.