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Well, please turn in your Bibles 
to Proverbs 31. We finished tonight looking at 
a biblical woman, biblical womanhood in the book of Proverbs. We considered 
her as woman and wife. Tonight we'll take up the biblical 
woman as mother. Of course, the Proverbs has a 
lot to say concerning this particular subject. We'll only sketch a 
few of the main points. Other portions in the Scripture 
speak to this. One being the fifth commandment 
found in the book of Exodus, chapter 20, Deuteronomy 5, where 
it asserts her authority. And then also the epistles of 
Paul, specifically in Ephesians and Colossians. As fathers are 
addressed there, I believe it extends also to mothers. I just want to take up reading 
chapter 31 in Proverbs, beginning in verse 10. Who can find a virtuous 
wife, for her worth is far above rubies? The heart of her husband 
safely trusts her, so he will have no lack of gain. She does 
him good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks wool 
and flax and willingly works with her hands. She is like the 
merchant ships. She brings her food from afar. 
She also rises while it is yet night and provides food for her 
household and a portion for her maidservants. She considers a 
field and buys it. From her profits, she plants 
a vineyard. She girds herself with strength 
and strengthens her arms. She perceives that her merchandise 
is good and her lamp does not go out by night. She stretches 
out her hands to the distaff and her hand holds the spindle. 
She extends her hand to the poor. Yes, she reaches out her hands 
to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for 
her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet. She 
makes tapestry for herself. Her clothing is fine linen and 
purple. Her husband is known in the gates 
when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen 
garments and sells them and supplies sashes for the merchants. Strength 
and honor are her clothing. She shall rejoice in time to 
come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, 
and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over 
the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 
Her children rise up and call her blessed. Her husband also, 
and he praises her. Many daughters have done well, 
but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty 
is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. 
Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own words 
praise her in the gates. Amen. Well, let us pray. Father, 
we thank you for the Holy Scripture, and we thank you that all Scripture 
is given by inspiration of God, and that it's profitable for 
doctrine, for reproof, for correction, and for instruction in righteousness. And we pray tonight, Lord God, 
that you would thoroughly furnish us unto every good work. We pray 
for the ladies in our church who are mothers, God. We pray 
that You would grant them great grace to see this as a high and 
noble calling, to see this as a place of great influence. And God, we just pray that You 
would cause them to truly seek to apply the Scriptures in their 
homes. And Father, help us as men to 
love our wives and to encourage them. And help us, Father in 
Heaven, to just govern by the Scriptures in our own homes. 
And God, as our homes are strong, we pray for this local church, 
that it would be unified, that there would be peace prevailing, 
that we would see your hand of mercy extended to sinners who 
come in among us. We would ask God that you would 
just do great things here. and pour out Your Holy Spirit 
and cause each of us to grow in the grace and in the knowledge 
of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. We ask now, God, that 
You would forgive us for all of our sins whenever we come 
face to face with our duty, with our responsibility. Certainly, 
it has that effect of showing us our sin. And how we thank 
You that there is a fountain open for sin and uncleanness. 
How we thank You for our Lord Jesus. How we thank You for redemption 
through His blood And our God, we pray that even now we would 
be encouraged by those gospel truths. And we ask in Christ's 
holy name. Amen. Well, as I said, we're 
going to take up biblical womanhood, specifically the woman as mother. And as we consider the Christian 
mother, there are three areas that I want to explore. First, 
her influence. Secondly, her authority. And 
thirdly, her responsibility. And then by way of application, 
we'll look at her dependence. her encouragement, and her comfort. But first, her influence. As 
we often have noted in the past, there are times when a woman 
might say, you know, I stay at home with the kids, and people 
raise their eyebrows and think, well, why don't you get a real 
job? It is a real job. It is full of influence. It is 
one of the most powerful influences in the life of a child. He is 
with, or she is with, her mother more often than anyone else. When asked what could be done 
to restore the prestige of France, Napoleon Bonaparte replied, give 
us better mothers. I think that's very telling. 
He understood this principle very well. Strong motherhood 
will have a good effect on the entirety of a nation. C.H. Spurgeon said, fathers and 
mothers are the most natural agents for God to use in the 
salvation of their children. He said, I am sure that in my 
early youth no teaching ever made such an impression upon 
my mind as the instruction of my mother. Neither can I conceive 
that to any child there can be one who will have such influence 
over the young heart as the mother who has so tenderly cared for 
her offspring. A man with a soul so dead as 
not to be moved by the sacred name of mother is creation's 
blot. Never could it be possible for 
any man to estimate what he owes to a godly mother. How can I 
ever forget her tearful eye when she warned me to escape from 
the wrath to come? I thought her lip eloquent. Others 
might not think so, but they certainly were eloquent to me. 
How can I ever forget when she bowed her knee and with her arms 
about my neck prayed, O that my son might live before Thee? So, a godly woman has an effect 
or a great amount of influence upon her children. And I think 
it is very important for you ladies to take that to heart. 
We see that here in Proverbs 31. You notice in verse 1, before 
he begins to discuss the virtues of a godly wife, notice in chapter 
31, verse 1, the words of King Lemuel, the utterance which his 
mother taught him. The mother, in a certain sense, 
exercised a great deal of influence over the king and over his kingdom. In chapter 1, verse 8 of Proverbs, 
it says, My son, hear the instruction of your father and do not forsake 
the law of your mother. Do not forsake it, children, 
when your mother instructs you good things from the law of God. 
He goes on to promise, for they will be a graceful ornament on 
your head and chains about your neck. This is a blessed and a 
wonderful and a beautiful influence that a mother exhibits in her 
home. Proverbs chapter 6, verse 20, 
a statement very similar to that in chapter 1. My son, keep your 
father's command and do not forsake the law of your mother. By virtue 
of the fact that the man is called to provide for his own, 1 Timothy 
5 tells us very clearly that a man must provide for his own 
or he is worse than an infidel. He is denied the faith if he 
is not providing clothing and shelter and food. By virtue of 
that fact, he has to work long hours. I don't know of any man 
who walks into Walmart and they say, here, let me give you everything 
you need. Let me just bestow on you all 
the necessities for a happy home life. That's never happened to 
me. I doubt it's ever happened to you. You probably don't go 
to Costco and they say, what kind of meat do you want today? 
How can we best benefit you and supply your home with good things? No, you have to work. You have 
to get up. You have to apply the Proverbs 
that speak of diligence into diligence and go out and work. 
So by virtue of that reality, in fact, the mother is with the 
children an awful lot. She exhibits a lot of influence. She teaches a lot of law. She 
is hopefully teaching a lot of gospel. She is seeking to disseminate 
biblical truth to her children while they are young, while they 
are ripe, while they are tender. So ladies, never forget the amount 
of influence that you exercise in the lives of your little ones. Secondly, her authority. As I 
already mentioned, this is grounded in the fifth commandment. In 
Exodus chapter 20, the fifth commandment tells us to honor 
your father and your mother. He goes on to specify that your 
days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving 
you. Honoring both parents is at the heart of the Ten Commandments. And the mother comes first in 
the command to respect them as part of a national holiness in 
Leviticus chapter 19 and verse 3. It's not as if you just have 
to honor your father, but you treat your mother like an equal 
or an inferior. No, your mother has authority. 
You ladies have authority. You wield great influence and 
great authority in the home. One man who wrote a book on the 
Ten Commandments, called the Ten Commandments, his name is 
Delma, Dutch theologian. He said, mentioning the mother 
is no afterthought, for she deserves to be treated with as much respect 
as the father. This is very important, especially 
for you young men. As young men hit their puberty 
years, they begin to assert themselves. They've got a little bit more 
testosterone growing. They want to challenge authority 
more often than not. They want to challenge Mom. Well, 
your mother has authority over you. It is a God-given, a God-instituted 
authority. It is grounded upon and founded 
in the very Decalogue or the Ten Commandments. You're not 
to resist. You're not to rebel. You're not 
to assert yourself against her. And if your father is a thinking, 
biblical man, he will make sure that such a thing does not happen. But he goes on to say, practice 
demonstrates that children can misuse the fact that a mother's 
physical condition often renders her less able to enforce her 
word. She is physically the weaker 
parent. But the fifth commandment clearly requires respect for 
both father and mother. Children must honor their mother 
even when she is physically and physiologically declining. Do 
not despise your mother when she is old. Proverbs 23, 22. The Bible presents a relationship 
of authority between husband and wife where the husband takes 
the lead. But children must show equal 
honor to both mother and father. So when you ladies speak the 
truth, you are God's representative, God's authority figure in the 
home. And you are not to try and bargain 
for this position. You're not to try and work it 
out so that the children agree. It is the fact. It is the case. It is the way that God has structured 
the home. We see through the Proverbs this 
authority of the mother asserted. Proverbs 15, verse 20, A wise 
son makes a father glad, but a foolish man despises his mother. You don't despise your mother 
and think that somehow this is going to work out for your good. She has authority over you. You 
need to submit. You need to respect. You need 
to honor that authority. Proverbs 19.26, He who mistreats 
his father and chases away his mother is a son who causes shame 
and brings reproach. We see there, father and mother 
equally authoritative or authority in the lives of their little 
ones. Proverbs 20 and verse 20, whoever curses his father or 
his mother, his lamp will be put out in deep darkness. Proverbs 23 and verse 22, Proverbs 
23 and verse 22, Listen to your father who begot you, and do 
not despise your mother when she is old. Buy the truth and 
do not sell it. Also wisdom and instruction and 
understanding. The father of the righteous will 
greatly rejoice, and he who begets a wise child will delight in 
him. Let your father and your mother be glad, and let her who 
bore you rejoice. She has dignity. She has a place 
of prestige. She has a place of honor in your 
life and you need to respect that and you need to submit to 
her. And women, mothers, you need 
to make sure you're not a bargaining person. You're not, oh, well, 
if you really feel like it, honey, indulging the children. You know 
what's best. God made you to know what's best. 
And you lovingly, graciously, with the law of kindness on your 
tongue, you enforce the rule in the home. Remember that, ladies. 
Your authority does not mean that you can be the tyrannical 
wretch, that you can just pound your fist. I mean, that's something 
descriptive of this particular woman in Proverbs 31. The law of kindness is on her 
tongue. She speaks graciously. You shouldn't 
have to yell. You shouldn't have to scream. 
You shouldn't have to go nuts. You shouldn't have to flip out. 
I have a vivid memory of the one time I think my mother tried 
to physically chastise me. This is kind of humorous. She 
was chasing my brother and I around the house with a yardstick, swinging 
it at us. And we were running for dear 
life trying to get away from her. I hope that's not how you 
conduct your home. I hope you're not running around 
your house swinging here a meter stick to try and hit your kid. That is not godly control. That is not self-control. That 
is not the biblical authority that the Lord has entrusted to 
you. Authority is a precious commodity 
given by God. It must be wielded biblically. You are not to be a tyrant. You 
are not to lose control. But on the same token, you are 
not to relinquish the authority that God has indeed placed in 
you. And then thirdly, her responsibility. Her responsibility. Four specifics 
with reference to her children. I'm sure there are plenty of 
others, but these are four that I hope will keep you busy over 
the next several weeks. First is to instruct your children. to instruct your children. We 
already read it in Proverbs 1 and verse 8. Proverbs 6, verse 20. Do not forsake the law of your 
mother. Presupposes that the mother is 
teaching. Presupposes that the mother is 
giving command. The mother is instructing. The 
mother doesn't let the child run rampant. The mother doesn't 
let the child indulge him or herself. The mother doesn't let 
the child declare what they're having for dinner. I don't want 
that food, I'm going to have this. No, you need to make sure 
that you are instructing them. In that instance or in that example, 
instruct them that you need healthy nutrients. You need to build 
up a strong body, and you're not going to do that by ingesting 
a lot of sugar. You need good food and lots of 
it. But even then, you need to control 
yourself, because you don't want too much, lots of it, or then 
you'll be unhealthy. But with reference to the Bible, 
with reference to the Scripture, it doesn't mean you've got to 
sit your children down and erect a little pulpit in the living 
room and let them have a three-point sermon every morning. But it 
ought to be that disposition that we find in Deuteronomy 6. 
You're instructing them when you rise up, when you walk by 
the way, when you lie down. You're putting Scripture before 
them. You're seeking to instill in them that design to take every 
thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ. You need to 
instruct your children. You need to teach them. I'm not 
suggesting that they need to know trigonometry and calculus 
from their professorial mother. But I am telling you that you 
need to instruct them in the ABCs of biblical truth and biblical 
Christianity. Secondly, you need to set an 
example for your children. Set an example for your children. One of the Puritans said, man 
often learns better by pattern than by precept. We oftentimes 
learn better by something that we view, something that we see, 
something that we observe, rather than a particular message. And 
I think that to a degree is largely true. And so a woman in the home 
needs to set a godly example. That doesn't mean she walks around 
praying all day long or that she never does anything because 
she's so holy and reading her Bible. That's not it. But as 
she goes about her daily tasks, she is mindful of the fact that 
little ones, impressionable ones, are watching her, are observing 
her. Bridges commenting on Proverbs 22.6, the one that says, train 
up a child in the way he should go. Bridges says, the mere talk 
to a child about religion, Now, when these guys used the word 
religion, they didn't mean it in a bad way. Today, religion 
is defined as a bad thing. Religious people are bad. Religion 
is bad. I don't know why that is the 
case. I don't know why it has fallen into such disuse. As long 
as we are talking about biblical religion, that is a good thing. It is simply a descriptor, a 
description of man's approach to God. That's not a bad thing. So he uses religion in a good 
sense, which we are free to do. He says, the mere talk to a child 
about religion without bringing it to bear upon his loose habits 
and self-willed tempers is utterly ineffective. None of us lives 
to himself alone. We are all spreading around us 
an influence, whether for good or evil. Here, therefore, in 
our families lies the responsibility of Christian consistency. And 
if you're like me, you will struggle with consistency. That's probably 
the hardest thing as parents. To be consistent. To not fall 
into arbitrariness. Consistency is what we ought 
to pursue by God's good grace. He says, if the child hears of 
godliness and sees but wickedness, this is bringing him bread with 
one hand and poison with the other, beckoning with the hand 
to heaven, and at the same time taking him by the hand and leading 
him to the way of destruction. Who would receive even the choicest 
food from a leprous hand? What a great illustration. Would 
you take the best looking piece of food from a man with a very 
diseased, falling apart hand? You'd say, no way. So how are 
children going to take that instruction concerning godliness and gospel 
and Christianity when they see a leprous life? When they see 
a lot of hypocrisy? He says, a child learns more 
by the eye than by the ear. Imitation is a far more powerful 
principle than memory. A well-trained child gladly looks 
to his parent's godliness as his model picture to copy after. A wayward child eagerly seeks 
for the excuse of his own delinquency. And this discovery and parental 
example will harden him in infidelity and ungodliness. Now, that's 
not to say, brethren, that you're going to sin in front of your 
child. You will. You do. It's a constant. But you deal with it biblically. 
You teach them what it is to seek forgiveness. You teach them 
biblical categories of repentance and forgiveness. You use biblical 
language. You teach them about the gospel 
and about mercy. And you teach them about these 
things so that they see, at least as far as they're able, a consistent 
example within the life of faith in their home. Thirdly, you need 
to discipline your children. We covered this briefly when 
we considered the father. Discipline involves two elements, 
verbal reproof and corporal punishment. Corporal punishment means you 
spank them. You discipline them. Proverbs 
20 says, the blueness of the wound scours away evil. In fact, let's just rehearse 
these passages. Because very often in our native 
depravity, we think that we are doing positive damage to our 
children by striking them. We're not hitting them in the 
head. We're not giving them five across the eyes. We're not giving 
them a skull thump. We're not beating them, you know, 
mercilessly. We are seeking to implement biblical 
correction. God has designed the human anatomy 
in such a way that it can take some loving discipline. Proverbs. 13 and verse 24, he who spares 
his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him 
promptly. Now your flesh will tell you 
just the opposite. How can I ever spank this little 
precious bundle that God has given me? Actually, you'll get 
beyond that. You'll see how you can spank 
that not so precious bundle after a period of time. But we need 
to understand the sparing of the rod is the hatred of a son. He who loves him disciplines 
him promptly. These two concepts are found 
in Paul's language in Ephesians and Colossians as well. We're 
to bring up our children in the training, the admonition of the 
Lord, act and word. In Proverbs 19, verse 18. Proverbs 19, verse 18. Chasten your son while there 
is hope and do not set your heart on his destruction. Look at those 
contraries. Chasten him while there is hope. 
Do not set your heart on his destruction. The idea being, 
brethren, you need to seek to reclaim. You need to seek to 
recover your child at an early age. Pastor Tim read it at the 
outset. How can a young man cleanse his 
way by taking heed according to Your Word. We often take that 
verse and we say, wow, yeah, you need to study the Bible, 
son. You need to understand the Scriptures, little girl. What's 
that text teach us? It teaches that a young man's 
way stands in need of cleansing. He's a sinner. And left to his 
own devices, he will always pursue destruction. A man on his own, 
untouched, unfelt, unhelped, by a loving mother and father, 
is going to pursue ungodliness. He is going to pursue destruction. There is a way that seems right 
to a man. But the end is destruction. Proverbs 20, verse 30, I already 
quoted it. Blows that hurt cleanse away 
evil. Or the blueness of the wound 
scours away evil in the King James. As do stripes the inner 
depths of the heart. Proverbs 22.15 Proverbs 22, 15, 
foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. Is that just 
the maxim? That's just the given? Oh, that's 
just the way it is? We're just destined to have this 
fool of a child in our home? No, he says, the rod of correction 
will drive it far from him. Let the humanists rail. Let them 
argue. Let them complain. Let them grumble. 
But the Scriptures know better. God who designed us says that 
a bit of biblical correction will drive that folly far from 
us. And a godly mother takes these 
things to heart and seeks to implement them. Proverbs 23, 
13. Do not withhold correction from a child. For if you beat 
him with a rod, he will not die." Again, not the swinging the yardstick 
through the house. The biblically self-controlled, 
judicious, godly use of discipline. That's what's in view here. If 
you want very particulars on this Application. I won't get 
into all that, what you should use and how you should do that. 
There's a book by a Reformed Baptist named Bruce Ray. His book is called Withhold Not 
Correction. It's a wonderful small book. 
dealing with the application of the rod. It is available at 
Valley Gospel Mission, or it used to be. It should probably 
still be there. It's a balanced, fair, accurate, 
and judicious treatment of biblical discipline. There are others 
to be sure. If you want to ask me later, I can try to think 
of a few more. But he says, do not withhold 
it from a child. For if you beat him with a rod, 
he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod 
and deliver his soul from hell. That's a blessed statement then. Biblical discipline is used by 
God for the restraint of the child's wickedness and for the 
inflowing of the Christian gospel. Proverbs 29 and verse 15. Proverbs 
29 and verse 15. The wrought and rebuked give 
wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. Some 
of the worst things in the world is to see a child left to himself. 
You've probably been at the Walmart or you've been somewhere where 
a kid just hasn't fit. A kid goes into a tantrum, and 
everybody around them wants to smack the kid, or spank the kid. Not smack, sorry about that. 
That suggests the whole... Sometimes it gets to that point. 
I know I've shared this before, but I remember early on, we used 
to go to the laundromat to do our laundry, and there was a 
lady with a kid in there. I wanted to throttle this child. 
I wanted to be a vigilante. See, I firmly believe when the 
government, the state, does not execute criminal offenders, then 
people want to do it themselves. That's wrong. It's vigilantism. When a parent isn't disciplining 
his child, everybody around them is volunteering for the job. 
I'll do it. Let me have at it. It's bad. It's nothing new under the sun. 
This is what the Proverbs say. A child left to himself brings 
shame to his mother. Rebekah saw one kid ramming his 
mother before. A nine-year-old kid. Didn't get 
his way. And is ramming the mother into 
the car. That's shameful. That's wretched. Ladies, don't ever let that happen 
to you. God has clothed you with authority. He has put in your hand the rod. 
And that rod and that reproof Give wisdom. It drives out foolishness. It is a blessed tonic to the 
native, depraved heart of your little child. It's not barbarism. It's not bad. It's not wicked. It is bad and barbaric and wicked 
to not use the means that God has ordained. The same way God 
has given the magistrate the sword for the punishment of criminal 
doers, so He has given the rod for the punishment of criminals 
in your home. Sorry, kids. I don't mean to 
sound too negative here. Proverbs 29, 17. Correct your 
son and he will give you rest. Yes, he will give delight to 
your soul. Why wouldn't we do this? Why 
wouldn't we implement God's means for the good of our children? 
Corporal punishment is not abuse. It's not bullying. You're not 
driven by anger. You're not swinging the yardstick, 
running through the house. It is self-controlled. It is 
disciplined. It is judicious. It is biblical 
in its application. But as well, it's verbal reproof. 
You know, the ratio, I think it was Pastor Barcelos, I heard 
him preaching one time, I point back there because his daughter's 
here with us tonight. Pastor Barcelos, I think, actually searched 
out and found the ratio to verbal reproof and rod in the Proverbs. Verbal reproof was up here and 
rod was down here. What's the idea? You should so 
instill in your children, you should so train your children 
that they respond to your verbal reproof. You don't have to swing 
the yardstick around. You don't have to count to three. 
Two and a half, two and three quarters. No. You're instilling in them rebellion. 
You're training them to disobey. It's first time obedience or 
it's not obedience. It's just that simple. You're 
training them. You're inculcating in them. You 
are hardening them in that pattern of rebellion and disobedience. Correct your son and he will 
give you rest. Yes, he will give delight to 
your soul. So, verbal reproof. This is not 
belittling. It's not shouting. It's not yelling. This is not making fun of them. 
This is not exasperating them. Rather, it is bringing to them 
the law of God. It is bringing to them the authority 
that you possess. It is bringing to their young 
minds and hearts what God has called you to do. So I quoted 
Bridges when we talked about fatherhood. The rod without affection 
is revolting tyranny. Get in the habit, brethren, after 
you spank, after you discipline, that you love, that you show 
affection, that you don't treat Him as outcast. You know, when 
God forgives us, He does forgive us. We can go right back to Him. 
He doesn't cast us off. We don't have to wait three hours 
before we approach Him. Sometimes parents discipline 
their children, then they have the cold shoulder to the child 
until that child really learns his or her lesson. Well, you 
haven't disciplined them properly. The rod without affection is 
revolting tyranny. So a responsibility, instruct, 
set an example, discipline, and love. Love. Titus 2, 3-5. Not that the Proverbs 
don't speak of this, but it's very clear in Titus 2, verses 
3-5. What a young woman is to learn. Titus 2, verse 3. The older women likewise, that 
they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to 
much wine, teachers of good things, that they admonish the young 
women to love their husbands to love their children. Now in 
Ephesians 5, it tells husbands, love your wives as Christ loved 
the church and gave Himself for her. And then it tells wives, 
submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. Respect your own 
husbands. You might come away from Ephesians 
5 saying, well, doesn't Paul want the woman to love her husband? Of course he does. That they 
admonish the young women to love their husbands to love their 
children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to 
their own husbands. Notice what's at stake here, 
that the Word of God may not be blasphemed. You betray your 
calling as a biblical woman, the Word of God is on the line. 
Paul says, be this way, do these things, let your conduct be worthy 
of the gospel, so that the Word of God may not be blasphemed. 
Obviously, you love your children, but it has to be biblical love. 
It has to be a 1 Corinthians 13 love. It has to prize what 
is best for them. It's not an indulgent, it's not, 
I'm going to give you everything, we're going to go bankrupt so 
you can have every new toy, whatever it is you want. That's not love. 
Love defined by the world. The more you give them, the more 
you love them. That's not necessarily true. You give them yourself. 
You give them your attention. You give them that instruction. 
You give them that example. You give them that discipline. 
These are tangible expressions of biblical love. Love ultimately 
is obedience in terms of God's Word. That's how you express 
love to your child. You hug them. You care for them. 
You spend time with them. Yes, you're busy. I understand 
that. But if you're only relating to 
your child as ever only discipline, eat your broccoli, do this, do 
that, clean this, clean that. Brethren, you don't need to get 
out for a moment. Take some time to chill out. Play some ball. Walk along the 
lake. Whatever it is. Just spend some 
time without always having to be disciplining. We always think 
we're so busy, we can't fit in 20 minutes to chill with our 
kids. Yes, we can. We have a lot of good stuff. 
God has blessed us. The dominion mandate is in full 
swing. Men are exercising dominion. 
There are things that make our lives a whole lot easier. Let's 
use some of the time that I know we all have to inculcate and 
foster closeness with our children to love them, to care for them, 
to show them, to demonstrate that we are for their well-being. 
Finally, by way of practical application, her dependence is 
ultimately upon God. A woman who fears the Lord. A 
woman who fears the Lord. She shall be praised. That's 
what's important. This is a tough job. You've got 
influence. You have authority. You have 
great responsibility. These are a high calling that 
is outside the realm of native man. You need to be dependent 
upon God's Word, upon God Himself. You need to be dependent upon 
His Word. You need to seek out biblical counsel. You need to 
read good books. Talk to the older women. When 
it says the older women instruct the younger women, I don't usually 
envision an older woman pushing herself on the younger women. 
I think the idea is that younger women identify older women And 
they go to them and they ask, can you teach me? Can you help 
me? Can you show me some of these things? Older women, if you see 
something and you want to thrust yourself upon that, go for it. 
We need to apply that section in Titus chapter 2. We need to 
demonstrate that camaraderie. If you have, as a woman, tried 
and seen some things that were ineffective or effective, pass 
it on to a younger woman. That's okay. That fosters fellowship. That fosters camaraderie. That 
is biblical. That is Titus 2. But if an older 
woman doesn't take charge, younger women, go and ask her. Remember 
when I first got converted, there was an old guy in our church. 
I just sought him out. I wanted to be with him. I wanted 
to learn what he knew. If I would have waited for him 
to come to me, I probably would have still been standing there 
scratching my head. If he would have said, look, get away from 
me, punk, I don't have time for you. Okay, go find another one. Man, brethren, we have to ask. The maxim in this world, and 
I fully believe it, the squeaky wheel, that's the grace. Her dependence is upon God. You 
need to search the Scriptures. You need to understand the Bible. 
You need to understand your children. You need to realize each child 
is different. Yes? They are all the same in 
their native depravity. But child A may not respond like 
child B. Child B may be different than 
child C. The way Peter tells husbands 
to live with their wives according to knowledge, so you need to 
live with your children according to knowledge. Your child may 
not be like that child. Don't compare them. How come 
you aren't learning the tuba by age three like so-and-so? It's going to crush the spirit, 
man. You don't do that. Your kid may 
never learn the tuba. He may never learn to do this, 
or he may never learn to do that. That's okay. God has a world 
where not everybody's a tuba player. God has a world where 
there's a division of labor. We seek by the grace of God to 
identify those things in our child and we cultivate them. 
Train up a child literally according to his own way. One man has said, 
you identify traits and characteristics that he is inclined to, and you 
seek to nurture him to that end. Train up a child according to 
his own way. Secondly, her encouragement. 
Look at God. See how God deals with you. See 
how God pities you, according to Psalm 103. We're often times 
not like God. And it's especially evident in 
the way that we deal with children. We say things to them like, how 
in the world could you have ever done this? When we know very 
well how they could do it. They're children of Adam. They 
have a sin nature. They have a propensity and a 
bent to that sort of activity. That doesn't mean we coddle them. 
We don't fondle them. We don't encourage them in that 
particular sin. But we do know why. God knows 
our frame according to the Psalter. And He pities us. He knows we're 
but dust. Look at God's parenting of His 
children. That is great encouragement. 
Seek the grace given by God through the Lord Jesus Christ. Your encouragement 
ought to come from the Scriptures. Your encouragement ought to come 
from other godly women who have trodden this path. Your encouragement 
ought to come from church history and the way that certain mothers 
have been effectively used by God for the good of their children. 
Spurgeon writes somewhere else that his mother actually told 
them. told the children, having pled 
with them to believe on the Lord Jesus, she told her kids that 
if on the day of judgment they were found outside of Christ, 
she would side with Jesus in condemning them. Because she 
knew that she had spent several hours of prayer, tears, pleading, 
beseeching them to flee to Christ. That's the kind of women we need 
to learn of. That's the kind of women we need 
to look to in terms of biblical motherhood. That is encouragement. And finally, your comfort ought 
to be the fact that Jesus Christ died and rose again. Because 
we all fail as fathers. We all fail as mothers. Your 
status or standing with God is not going to let you into heaven 
because you disciplined your child so well. He's going to 
let you into heaven because Jesus paid it all. He's going to let 
you into heaven because God made him who knew no sin to be sin 
for us. Never forget this gospel. Never forget this good news. 
Far from it's causing you to say, well, Jesus paid it all, 
so I'll just lay on the couch and watch my kids destroy themselves. 
That's not the way it works. The true biblical Gospel is such 
that Jesus paid it all. Therefore, by God's grace, I 
want to love these children. I want to encourage these children. 
But when I fail and when I sin against them, I'm going to confess 
it and forsake it and find mercy. And then I'm going to press onward. 
Be comforted by the fact that your status with God ultimately 
is secured by the finished work of a glorious Mediator, even 
Jesus Christ our Lord. Well, brethren, ladies, sisters, 
Please take these things to heart. Obviously, the Proverbs is a 
big book. It has many more things to say. 
Search it out. And men, pray for your wives. 
Pray for your wives and your children. Let it not be the case. I remember going on a pastoral 
visit, not here, but in another church, and I asked a man. He 
didn't pray for his wife. I died a little. I used this 
phrase today when I found something out. I died a little. I could 
not believe him. What do you mean you don't pray 
for your wife? You're in this together, one 
flesh. You need to pray for your wife. 
You need to pray for your children. You need to encourage her. Buy 
her the book by Bruce Ray. Actually, you should read it 
with her. Don't leave all that to her. You're the ultimate head 
of the home. You need to make sure that things 
are going according to the Scripture. But take those things and nurture 
and care for and encourage so that God will be glorified in 
our families. Well, let us pray. Father, we 
thank You for the Scriptures and the fact that they speak 
to every area of our lives. And I pray for the ladies here 
that You would encourage them, that You would just strengthen 
them, Father, I pray for our children, that you would give 
them receptive hearts and a desire to submit to their parents, a 
desire first and foremost to flee to Christ for that forgiveness 
of sins and that righteousness given by God. And I pray that 
you would just do a great and a glorious work in these young 
people, that you would raise them up, God, to do great things 
for the Lord, that they would have jobs, that they would have 
families, that they would be able to go to churches and support 
local churches and support missionaries and do those things that the 
Scripture enjoins. And our Father, we pray that 
You would be glorified in all that we do. We ask through Christ 
our Lord. Amen.