Okay, you can turn in your Bibles to 2 Samuel 13. 2 Samuel chapter 13. I'll read the whole chapter, but our focus tonight is on the second half, verses 23 to 39. Because the second half depends on the first half, I'll read that as well. It is a difficult chapter.
It's filled with the sin of man, And as I was thinking about this, I considered the fact that if it were not for God and His grace, the kingdom would never even be, let alone extend and advance and be preserved. If it was up to men, then it would certainly tumble and fall, but because of God's grace and mercy, He does cause His kingdom to march onward. 2 Samuel 13, beginning in verse 1. After this, Absalom, the son of David, had a lovely sister, whose name was Tamar. And Amnon, the son of David, loved her.
Amnon was so distressed over his sister Tamar that he became sick, for she was a virgin. And it was improper for Amnon to do anything to her. But Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother. Now Jonadab was a very crafty man, and he said to him, why are you, the king's son, becoming thinner day after day?
Will you not tell me? Amnon said to him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister. So Jonadab said to him, lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when your father comes to see you, say to him, please let my sister Tamar come and give me food and prepare the food in my sight that I may see it and eat it from her hand.
And Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. And when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, Please, let Tamar, my sister, come and make a couple of cakes for me in my sight, that I may eat from her hand. And David sent home to Tamar, saying, Now go to your brother Amnon's house, and prepare food for him. So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house, and he was lying down.
And she took flour and kneaded it, made cakes in his sight, and baked the cakes. And she took the pan and placed them out before him, but he refused to eat. Then Amnon said, Have everyone go out from me. And they all went out from him.
Then Amnon said to Tamar, Bring the food into the bedroom, that I may eat from your hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them to Amnon her brother in the bedroom. Now when she had brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, Come, lie with me, my sister. But she answered him, no, my brother, do not force me, for no such thing should be done in Israel.
Do not do this disgraceful thing. And I, where could I take my shame? And as for you, you would be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you.
However, he would not heed her voice, and being stronger than she, he forced her and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, Arise, be gone. So she said to him, No, indeed, this evil of sending me away is worse than the other that you did to me. but he would not listen to her.
Then he called his servant who attended him and said, here, put this woman out, away from me, and bolt the door behind her. Now she had on a robe of many colors, for the king's virgin daughters wore such apparel. And his servant put her out and bolted the door behind her. Then Tamar put ashes on her head and tore her robe of many colors that was on her, and laid her hand on her head and went away crying bitterly.
And Absalom, her brother, said to her, Has Amnon, your brother, been with you? But now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this thing to heart.
So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house. But when King David heard of all these things, he was very angry. And Absalom spoke to his brother Amnon, neither good nor bad. For Absalom hated Amnon because he had forced his sister Tamar.
And it came to pass after two full years that Absalom had sheep shearers in Baal Hazor, which is near Ephraim. So Absalom invited all the king's sons. Then Absalom came to the king and said, kindly note, your servant has sheep shearers. Please let the king and his servants go with your servant.
But the king said to Absalom, No, my son, let us not all go now, lest we be a burden to you. Then he urged him, but he would not go, and he blessed him. Then Absalom said, If not, please let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said to him, Why should he go with you?
But Absalom urged him, so he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him. Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Watch now, when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say to you, Strike Amnon, then kill him. Do not be afraid. Have I not commanded you?
Be courageous and valiant. So the servants of Absalom did to Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose, and each one got on his mule and fled. And it came to pass, while they were on the way, that news came to David, saying, Absalom has killed all the king's sons, and not one of them is left.
So the king arose and tore his garments and lay on the ground, and all his servants stood by with their clothes torn. Then Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose they have killed the young men, the king's sons, for only Amnon is dead. For by the command of Absalom, this has been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar. Now therefore, let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king's sons are dead, for only Amnon is dead.
Then Absalom fled, and the young man who was keeping watch lifted his eyes and looked, and there many people were coming from the road on the hillside behind him. And Jonadab said to the king, Look, the king's sons are coming. As your servant said, so it is. So it was, as soon as he had finished speaking, that the king's sons indeed came, and they lifted up their voice and wept.
Also the king and all his servants wept very bitterly. But Absalom fled and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day. So Absalom fled and went to Geshur and was there three years.
And king David longed to go to Absalom, for he had been comforted concerning Amnon, because he was dead. Amen.
Introduction
Well, as I said, this is an unsavory chapter of Scripture filled with incestual rape and murder, vengeful murder. And a few things by way of reminder, if you remember last week in the beginning part of the chapter in verses 1 to 22, we see the desire on Amnon's part to lay with Tamar. Now, she is his sister. They both have the same father.
They do have different mothers. However, they are blood relatives, so this compounds the sin, its incest and its rape, conducted by or executed by Amnon. We see the assistance of Jonadab, this crafty man. He's described as being wise.
Literally, that's what verse 2 tells us. He was wise. I'm sorry, verse 3. The new King James renders it very crafty.
I think the NIV has it shrewd, which is a good interpretation. He had a wisdom, but it wasn't mingled with principle. He had no integrity. He had no righteousness.
And Jonadab fares in our story tonight as well, and he doesn't look a whole lot better. Also, we saw the act committed by Amnon. It was rape. He forced her.
The text is conspicuous in verse 14, verse 22, and then even Jonadab rehearses the same thing in the passage that we read tonight and indicates that Jonadab knew of of Absalom's intention to deal with Amnon in this way. And then in verses 15 to 22, we have the aftermath, the various responses or the reactions by the persons involved in the story. It says that Amnon hated her with great hatred, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her." Amnon's love for her initially was not love, it was lust. He was governed by his desires, he was driven by his lusts and by his passions.
We see the response of Tamar. She is disgraced, she goes to stay with her brother Absalom, and she remains desolate there. The text specifically indicates concerning Absalom that Absalom hated Amnon. He hated him.
He despised him. He did not approve, obviously, of what Amnon had done to his sister. And then the text indicates David's response in verse 21. But when King David heard of all these things, he was very angry.
And the text just moves right on. I think the author wants us to appreciate that David should have done something. Even though David didn't have the moral authority he once had because of his own indiscretion or his own sin, adultery with Bathsheba and then the murder of Uriah, nevertheless, David should have acted. It was good that he was angry, it was good that he was upset, but it was bad that he didn't act.
And we'll see that as we move through the passage tonight. And we do need to as well remember the conspicuous nature of these sins. Amnon's sexual rape, or his escapade with Tamar, corresponds to David with Bathsheba. And then Absalom's contrived murder of Amnon corresponds to David's dispatching of Uriah.
And this is in accordance with what God had said to David there would be consequences as a result of his sin, and we see that even here in chapter 13. So, tonight we'll look at the murder of Amnon in verses 23 to 29. Secondly, the reaction of David in verses 30 to 33. And then thirdly, the flight of Absalom in verses 34 to 39.
But
The Murder of Amnon
note first, with reference to Absalom in verse 23a. and it came to pass after two full years." So he has been nurturing this anger. He has been nurturing this hatred. He has been nurturing this vengeful spirit for two long years. So what happens in this particular passage is premeditated.
It is malice aforethought. It fits all of the requirements, obviously, of the crime of murder. He hated him. and he nurtured that hatred for two full years after the rape of his sister. Calvin said, for the space of two years, he nursed the hatred which he had conceived until he at last spat out his venom and executed the vengeance which he had conceived in his own heart.
Now, as we work our way through the passage, I'm sure it might rise up in your heart, as it has in mine, that Amnon got what was coming to him. I mean, he committed capital rape, he committed incest, the law of God stipulated that he die for that. But just because the justice inflicted upon him was legitimate, it does not mean the means by which that justice was inflicted upon him was legitimate. We are never to condone or encourage vigilantism.
Now, I suspect, or I believe, and I will argue later, that David's inactivity set the stage for such a response. In other words, when the civil government, when our earthly rulers don't do their jobs, then it causes the sons of men to engage in things that are not righteous. Well, it doesn't cause them, they're free moral agents, but it's certainly a circumstance, and so the idea is is that the government or the civil authority is supposed to do what they're supposed to do, so that private individuals won't be seeking out justice at their own hands. So, what we have here is a case of unauthorized homicide.
It is a murder of Amnon. Now,
Absalom's Plan at the Feast
note his plan in verses 23b to 27. He's having a sheep-shearing party. I know that strikes us as a bit odd, but in this particular culture, we saw it back in 1 Samuel 25 with Nabal, a sheep shearing party. It happened typically in the summertime.
They would shear the sheep, and they would drink, and they would feast, and they would eat, and they would just have a right merry old time. shearing sheep and counting their money and enjoying the blessings and the provisions of God. This is precisely what was going on. Davis says that Absalom was having a sheep shearing party. It would be a perfect time to shear sheep and to butcher Amnon.
You see, this is his procedure, this is his plan, this is what he is going to carry out. Note that he invites the king, he asks his father in verse 24, kindly note your servant has sheep shearers, please let the king and his servants go with your servant. Now perhaps because of David's track record previously, Absalom is betting on the fact that David won't attend. I doubt he really wants David to attend because Absalom's plan is to liquidate Amnon.
He does not want King David there, but David has been somewhat inactive, not just according to verse 21, but when kings went out to battle, David stayed behind in Jerusalem. David's been using Joab more and more. And so Absalom asks David to participate in this, and David says in verse 25, No, my son, let us not all go now, lest we be a burden to you. And I think that means financial aid.
And King David comes, then his entourage comes, and then servants come, and Absalom probably doesn't have enough sheep and shearers to feed that particular group. So David kindly rejects or declines the offer, and then Absalom pushes. Notice in verse 26. He says, if not, please let my brother Amnon go with us.
Now one wonders if David had any suspicion whatsoever or did the passage of the two years solidify in David that everything was okay between Absalom and Amnon. I mean, think about it. You're a father. You know that one of your sons raped one of your daughters, and that the other son is very upset about that activity.
So when that son says, can you send Amnon? I'd like him to enjoy the feast and the party tonight. I don't know about you, but I might be thinking that I don't know if this is such a good idea. It does seem as if there's a bit of hesitation on David's part.
Notice in verse 27. Or verse 26, and the king said to him, why should he go with you? Again, I don't know if he's suspicious or if he's just inquisitive or what the issue is, but Absalom urged him, so he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him. Now if you notice something intriguing here, what's David's function?
David's function in this particular account is exactly his function in the previous account. Robert Alter says Absalom's making David his go-between to lure Amnon to his death, just as Amnon made David his go-between to lure Tamar to her violation. So it was Amnon that went to David so that David would send Tamar to Amnon. And it's Absalom who goes to David so that David will send Amnon to Absalom.
Matthew Henry comments on this. He says both incidents, the Amnon situation, the rape of Tamar and the murder of Amnon, he says both incidents were great griefs to David. and the more because he was unwittingly made accessory to both by sending Tamar to Amnon and Amnon to Absalom. In some respects, he had a hand in it. Now, it was unwitting.
He was not complicit in the sense that he knew what was going on, but it certainly was an awkward position for David to be in as the one who sent Tamar to be raped by Amnon and the one who sends Amnon to be butchered by Absalom. Again, He didn't know that, he didn't mean to, but I think the text is indicating something of that sword not departing from David's house, directly connected to the fact that David had brought this on to his own family. Now
Execution of the Murder
note the execution of his plan in verses 28 and 29. He commands them to murder Amnon. I mean, the Geneva Bible says, you know, men in authority think that they should be obeyed whenever they say anything. And that's precisely what we have here.
Now, Absalom had commanded his servants, verse 28, watch now, when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say to you, strike Amnon, then kill him. He commands them to murder Amnon. Amnon had it coming to him, I understand that, he had sinned, a grievous sin, he had broken the law in Israel, but he deserved to die at the hand of the governing authority and not at the hand of Absalom's henchmen. Notice as well, he encourages them with language that sounds as if he's sending them out to battle with Philistines. when he's sending them out to do some noble, valiant thing.
In fact, he uses that language. He says, do not be afraid. What do you mean, do not be afraid? Do you think this is, pardon the pun, overkill?
I mean, the man's heart is married with wine. I don't think he poses much of a threat. You're not launching an attack on Osama Bin Laden's compound. You're not engaged in some military strategy that's going to take expert precision to carry it out.
He's a man that is under the influence of alcohol. And for Absalom to say, do not be afraid, and then he says, be courageous and valiant. I think it drips with irony. I think it's palpable.
I mean, what is involved here is a very cowardice and a very lawless act, and he tells them to be courageous and to do it with valiancy. That's absolutely horrendous, the sorts of things that he is commanding in this particular instance. John Gill said, it is very reasonably supposed that Absalom had not only in view to revenge the rape of his sister, but to get himself next heir to the crown. And if that was the case, you could see the vested interest in the servants in carrying this out.
Because if Absalom assumes the throne in Israel, well then, he'll remember those servants that did that nasty deed of disposing Amnon. So you see how it all sort of jives together and fleshes itself out. And then in verse 29, so the servants of Absalom did to Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose, and each one got on his mule and fled.
And just a bit of a foretaste, we're going to draw out some lessons later, but you really see how sin begets sin, don't you? You really see how it just opens the door for further instances of sin. And this is why we are told to cut sin off, or actually to resist temptation, not to act upon it, not to give into it, and specifically when it comes to hatred and anger. What does Paul tell us in Ephesians 4.26?
Paul is conspicuous that we're not to let the sun go down on our anger, nor give place to the devil. Guess what Absalom did? He let the son go down on his anger for two long years. And in so doing, he gave place to the devil.
And so that sin of hatred and the anger that he harbored for that two long years, ultimately was fleshed out in the execution of his brother. Again, not an innocent man, but a man under the influence of alcohol and a man that was murdered outright as a result of someone who didn't have the sort of self-control that Amnon himself didn't have. If you look back in chapter 13, when you study Amnon, what's his problem? He's not governing his passions.
He's not watching over his heart. He is not restraining himself from wickedness. He's not practicing self-control. Well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree because that's the same thing that Absalom is doing.
Again, they don't have the best model in terms of at least practical religion with David because David is functioned in an ungoverned and in an ungodly way when he lay with Bathsheba and when he murders Uriah. You see, sin is nasty business, and the moment that we entertain it just a little bit, and we don't cut it off at the root, it's going to grow. Does any of us doubt that? Has any of us ever had an experience with sin where it just had its little way with us, and then it was done, and it ran off, and it was okay to live on it?
No, it always wants the uttermost, doesn't it? John Owen says something in Volume 6, a volume I think everybody should read, by the way. Something to the effect that, you know, every lustful look would end in utter adultery, if not checked. Every angry thought or every thought of bitterness would end in murder.
Every doubt would end in utter atheism if not checked and stopped. And I suspect Owen knew the human heart quite well because he knew his Bible. And we need to understand that and appreciate that and see that right here fleshed out with Absalom. He let the sun go down on his anger.
Now, that may not be our experience, where we, you know, bide our time for two long years, and then we throw a sheep-shearing party, and we invite our arch-nemesis, and we dispatch... No, that may not be our issue. But when husbands and wives let the sun go down on their anger, when parents and children let the sun go down on their anger, when friends let the sun go down on their anger, what does it do according to Ephesians 4.27? It gives place to the devil.
This is the reality, and we need to appreciate that. We need to see it in the heart and life of Absalom. Two years the guy harbored this. Two years he plotted.
Two years he planned. The time was right. He asked the king, he sends Amnon, and done. It's over.
Brethren, we have to learn from passages like these. We're not moralizing the tax. We're not looking at Absalom as the moral lesson that we all ought not to follow. But we would be fools not to see the consistency in our own hearts and in our own lives with what goes on in passages like these.
But for the grace of God, we don't sit on our anger for two years and actually murder somebody. But for the grace of God, we don't get up on our roof and see some woman bathing, and then send for her and take her for ourselves, and then murder her husband in order to cover it up. But for the grace of God, we're not in it. We don't have our sister Tamar.
We don't engage in incestual rape. But for the grace of God, brethren, It's not because we're champions of morality or we're exponents of virtue, but rather it is because God in His grace is merciful to us. So we ought to learn the lessons from men like Absalom. We ought to learn from Amnon.
We ought to learn from Jonadab. With friends like Jonadab, you're going to be in big, big trouble. Get away from the Jonadabs in your lives. You don't need crafty men or wise men who have no principle.
You don't need crafty men who are not righteous men. You need righteous, godly, wise men and women in your lives. So all of these men, and even David, All of them are examples of how not to be and who not to surround yourself with. It's unfortunate.
Chapter 13, as I mentioned last week, is a godless chapter. It's godless in terms of the conduct of its players, and it's godless in terms of the fact that God is not mentioned, they don't look to Yahweh, they don't ask for help, there's no counsel being sought, there's no prayer being given, there's no worship being offered to Him. It is godlessness fleshed out through the lives of sinful people. Now
David's Reaction to the News
notice the reaction of David in verses 30 to 33. He first hears an exaggerated report. And it came to pass, while they were on the way, that news came to David, saying, Absalom has killed all the king's sons, and not one of them is left. You can see why David responds the way that David responds, right?
I mean, this is terrible news, especially in light of 2 Samuel chapter 7. Remember, God made a promise to David that of his seed there would be one who would sit upon the throne, his kingdom would reign forever and ever. So David remembers this promise called the Davidic covenant in 2 Samuel 7, that he would have an heir, that he would have a seed, that one would reign on his throne. And here he hears that all of his sons are dead.
This certainly throws him into a tailspin at this particular spot. So the king arose, verse 31, and tore his garments and lay on the ground, and all his servants stood by with their clothes torn. The storytelling here, the way the narrative is created is just brilliant. I mean, isn't this exactly what Tamar does after she is raped?
She tears her clothes, and we see the same sort of thing in this instance. David hears this terrible news that all of his sons are killed, and so he tears his garments, he lays on the ground, and all his servants stood by with their clothes torn. So David responds, he reacts to the very news that he has received that all his sons are dead. apparent, are gone. And so he responds accordingly.
Then Jonadab, verse 32, the son of Shimea, David's brother, so it's David's nephew, answered and said, let not my lord suppose they have killed all the young men, the king's sons, for only Amnon is dead. Aren't we glad that we have Jonadab here to narrate and weave the tale for us? I mean, you know, all of them are terrible in this chapter, but Jonadab is a special type of terrible. Amnon is governed by his lust.
Absalom is governed by his vengeful spirit. Jonadab just plays the field. He'll be whoever you want him to be. Jonadab, you know, would have been perfect in any political cabinet today.
He would be, you know, the archetype of political office in our own generation. But notice, he says, do not be afraid, do not suppose that they've killed all the young men, the king's sons, for only Amnon is dead. Now, notice at the end of verse 32, for by the command of Absalom, this has been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar. So that indicates that Jonadab knew the plan, doesn't it?
Or at least hints at the fact that he knew the plan. Matthew Henry makes this comment concerning Jonadab. And Matthew Henry is free, by the way. If you don't have Matthew Henry, get Matthew Henry.
It's a great commentary on every verse in the Bible. So if you ever have a question, I wonder what this means. I'm not saying he's always got the right answer, but he'll put you in the ballpark, and sometimes getting in the ballpark is helpful. If you can just get into the ballpark of a particular text, and you start praying through it, and thinking through it, and musing on it, and you see what Henry says, and John Gill's also free, and I would recommend him even more so. then you're in the ballpark with two good men, and you're hopefully going to get some help.
But here's what Henry says. What a wicked man was he, John Adab, if he knew all this, or had any cause to suspect it, that he did not make David acquainted with it sooner. That means might be used to make up the quarrel, or at least that David might not throw Amnon into the mouth of danger by letting him go to Absalom's house. So if Jonadab knew this for the two years that the plan was hatched or cooking or brewing in Absalom's heart, Matthew Henry's right.
What a wicked man. He could have headed this off at the pass. On the one hand, Absalom, we understand you're angry, you're upset, you hate him in your heart, but you can't do this. They could have used that time to talk him off the ledge and stop him from doing what he was going to do.
Henry goes on, if we do not our utmost to prevent mischief, we make ourselves accessory to it. It is well if Jonadab was not as guilty of Amnon's death as he was of his sin. Such friends do those prove who are hearkened to as counselors to do wickedly. He that would not be so kind as to prevent Amnon's sin would not be so kind as to prevent his ruin.
See what he's saying? This is a wretched man and a man that you don't want as a friend. If Jonadab wasn't concerned enough for Amnon to stop him from engaging in incestual rape, then he doesn't care enough to stop him from getting a knife in the belly or however the servants carried it out. He didn't care about Amnon.
He doesn't care about Absalom. He doesn't care about David. The Jonadabs of this world, they care about the Jonadabs of this world. They care about themselves.
They're shrewd, they're crafty, they're cunning, they're wise, but there's no principle, there's no righteousness, there's no integrity, there's no loyalty, there's no fidelity. You see, just because a man is wise doesn't mean anything. Wisdom must be coupled with all those other virtues to make it a good thing. He goes on to say, or he says, he that would not be so kind as to prevent Amnon's sin would not be so kind as to prevent his ruin, when it should seem he might have done both.
And then finally, notice the flight of Absalom in verses 34 to 39.
The Flight of Absalom
Then Absalom fled. Why do you think Absalom fled? Because he knew he broke the law. He knew that what he did was wrong.
Gil makes this observation. He says, he who promised his servants protection could not protect himself. I mean, didn't he tell his servants, don't be afraid, be courageous, be valiant. What's the implication?
I'll take care of you. I'll protect you. I'll watch over you. I'll make sure everything's good for you.
He who promised his servants protection could not protect himself, and who no doubt fled with him. He knew what he had done was death by law, and that there was no city of refuge for such sort of murder as this. And he had no reason to hope the king would suffer so foul a crime as this to pass on Punished remember the cities of refuge there were several of them in the nation of Israel and the cities of refuge were places Where persons who had committed manslaughter they had committed homicide, but not murder They could flee to these cities of refuge and there find safe haven they would be protected They would not be executed for this particular act remember the Bible makes a distinction between homicide or manslaughter rather and murder Manslaughter is when you accidentally kill somebody. The biblical illustration is you're chopping wood in your backyard and the axe head flies off and it buries itself in your neighbor's head.
You didn't mean to do that. I mean, you were a bit... not cautious and not checking the axe head, I mean, maybe you could be done for that, I don't know, but it flies off, hits your neighbor, that's manslaughter, you killed him, it's homicide, but you didn't have malice aforethought, you didn't premeditate it. The alternate example or the illustration of murder is that you lie in wait for him, you hide in his bush with your axe ready to roll, and when he pops up, you smack him and you murder him. Well, the cities of refuge were for those guilty or those who had engaged in manslaughter.
There's no city of refuge for a murderer. What does old covenant law demand for murder, for the crime of murder? It demands death, not murder. Don't ever say murder.
To execute a criminal offender is not murder. That is a legitimate expression of violence. There are three of them in scripture. The capital punishment, self-defense, and legitimate war.
So it's not murder to kill somebody on a battlefield. It's not murder to execute a criminal offender that deserves it. And it's not murder if somebody breaks into your house tonight and they try to hit you with an axe, but you wriggle it out of their hands and give them a whack. That's self-defense.
It's not murder. Murder includes malice. It includes premeditation. And as we apply that grid to Absalom, he is the textbook character.
Two years of premeditation. There's no court in Israel that would let him out on a technicality. He was guilty and he knew it. So he left.
He fled from there. Now notice. What we find, verse 35, Jonadab said to the king, look, the king's sons are coming. This is from verse 34.
And then notice what Jonadab says here, as your servant said, so it is. Ah, this guy just bugs me. That's a little self-exaltation, isn't it? This guy loves himself, as your servant said, so it is.
Gil says, he seems to applaud himself and exult at his penetration and foresight. I'm actually the brains of this operation, David, so, you know, just calm down. The king's sons are coming, as your servant said, so it is. Verse 36, so it was as soon as he had finished speaking that the king's sons indeed came, and they lifted up their voice and wept.
Also the king and all his servants wept very bitterly. Now Absalom fled to family. Absalom fled to his maternal grandfather. If you go back to 2 Samuel 3, it indicates who David's sons were by the various wives he had.
And Maacah was the daughter of Telmai, who was the son of Gesher. Absalom has this connection to Gesher, so he flees there. It's outside of David's jurisdiction, and so he goes and he finds safe haven there for three years. Now notice verse 39.
It says, "...and King David longed to go to Absalom, for he had been comforted concerning Amnon, because he was dead." It's kind of a puzzling verse at this particular point. I think there's a couple of ways we can understand it. The way it's in the New King James. And then what our margin has, there's a gloss or a variation on this particular text.
And did David long to go to Absalom in the sense that he couldn't wait to be reconciled to him or see him again? you know, restart their father-son relationship? I mean, it had been three years. The text specifies that his heart was now comforted concerning Amnon. That doesn't mean it was okay, but three years, you do move on.
And so does David now long to go and be with Absalom, or as the margin says, did he cease to pursue after him? Did he stop wanting to find Absalom? Did he just cut his losses with that son and say he's with Gesher and we just don't, you know, we aren't going to move on anymore. Note 14.1, there's a bit of a translation issue here too.
So Joab, the son of Zariah, perceived that the king's heart was concerned about Absalom. So, what follows then in chapter 14 is Joab's design to get David and Absalom back together. So, that being the case, when we get to verse 39, when it says he longed to go to Absalom, that doesn't necessarily mean everything was hunky-dory. It doesn't mean everything was absolutely, positively wonderful. because then in chapter 14, Joab wouldn't have had the labor to try and get them together.
Robert Vanoy says something to this effect. He says, If 14.1 is translated as he longed to see Absalom, not trying to be confusing, but it'll probably come up in 14. Why in the world, if David was longing to see Absalom according to 13.39, doesn't he just go see Absalom? Why does Joab have to send to this woman from Tekoa and have her go to David and try to, you know, grease the wheels of progress to bring these two men together?
You see, it will come up if you're, you know, reading the text and thinking through things like that. So I just want to try and head that off at the pass. He says, if it's translated long to see, then there would be no need for Joab's elaborate scheme to secure Absalom's return to Jerusalem as reported in 14.1-20. This, however, is not as clear as it might seem.
There appears to have been a deep ambivalence in David's heart concerning how to deal with Absalom's murder of Amnon and his self-imposed exile. It is possible that Joab perceived this ambivalence and decided that the best course of action was to push David toward reconciliation." I think that probably, I don't know how much ambivalence, I don't know that I'm with Vanoi there, but I think I see the flow. if David is longing for him in verse 39. I don't think there's anything wrong with keeping that translation and then seeing in 14 that Joab just wants to prod him so that he will rejoin with Absalom. So, you may be thoroughly confused over that last seven minutes.
Sometimes those textual things are helpful for me as I try to stay rooted in the context and what's going on. But
Application and Observations
let's close with just a few observations on this passage.
Beware Counselors Without Integrity
In the first place, I think we've picked on Jonadab not enough. If you have a friend like Jonadab, it might be best to cut bait. He's not a good influence for you. He's not a good person.
Crafty, wise, shrewd, but without integrity, without fidelity, without kindness, without the things that the Bible enjoins, is consistent with wisdom. It's not enough to just have the answers. We need to have the answers with Christian grace and with virtue and with love and kindness and with a genuine desire to do good things. Jonadab was in a situation.
Now, he did not necessarily knowingly facilitate rape, but he necessarily knowingly facilitated a situation where there would be an intimate encounter. He set it up in such a way, or he told Amnon to set it up in such a way that Tamar would be in his bedroom. Again, I don't want to pin rape on Jonadab, but Jonadab was certainly guilty of facilitating this intimate meeting between Amnon and Tamar. We get down into our passage tonight, and Jonadab, at least from what we read, had an idea of what was going on with reference to Absalom's intention with reference to Amnon.
And he never stops to intervene. He never seeks to try and help. He never tries to put himself into the situation to stop men from engaging in utter wickedness. Solomon will say in Proverbs, My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent.
Certainly don't be their friends. Don't be the kinds of people that surround yourself with that sort of influence. The Bible is very clear that Jonadabs are the type of people in our lives that corrupt good morals. And if you have a Jonadab in your life, cut them out.
I don't mean do it the way Absalom did it with Ammon, but you cannot continue with ungodly people because they will drag you down. As well,
The Danger of Nursed Hatred
secondly, we ought to consider Absalom. He responds to this situation with hatred. Again, on a level, brethren, all of us can identify with. We get it, right?
I mean, your sister's raped. You don't want to throw a parade for the rapist. There's a hatred element. There's an anger element.
There is this longing, because I think Well, I don't think, I know we're created in the image of God. God is a God of righteousness, God is a God of justice. For the believer to cry out for God's justice and righteousness to be poured out on the heads of a vile offender, I think that's legit. But it's what he does with that hatred, it's what he does with that anger that ruins him.
He nurtures hatred for two years. Can you imagine that? Just biding your time. I wonder if we do that, though.
I wonder. We may not be, Absalom, about to dispatch Amnon into the next world, but do we harbor bitterness, anger, malice, strife for two years, for three years, for four years? We break relationships. We never seek reconciliation.
We don't try to fix it. We don't try to mend it. We've gone through this in our studies in the Confession, the whole process of church discipline. Is church discipline in the Bible so that we can be mean to people?
Absolutely not. Church discipline is in the Bible so that we can have fellowship and closeness and reconciliation with people. It's a process that the believing people of God are to employ. They're not to resist it.
They're not to be afraid of it. They're not to nurture hatred toward a brother for whom Jesus died because they're too afraid to go to them. or they're too afraid to let sin cover a multitude of sins, or they're too afraid or too proud rather to just go out and deal with sin the way they should. If you've got a bitter, vengeful spirit in your heart, or you're a bitter, vengeful spirit, take it to Absalom and say, hey, this is the outcome of this sort of thing. He bides his time until revenge could be executed.
He plots with malicious intent. I mean, the whole sheep-shearing thing. I just have this picture of him at home with his calendar. When kids are little and they have a special event, they make those chains and they rip off one a day.
Mom might say, well, four more sleeps until the big day. That's how I see Absalom. He is chomping at the bit, but he's biding his time. He's careful.
He's going to nurture, He's going to harbor, He's going to contain that hatred and anger, but it will be spent, it will be fleshed out. He commands His servants to murder Amnon. As we have seen, the act of sin begets acts of sin. It's just the nature of the case.
Acts of sin begets acts of sin. When David commits adultery with Bathsheba, he doesn't stop. He doesn't repent. He doesn't say, please forgive me, Bathsheba and Uriah.
Please forgive me to my other one. He doesn't do that. More sin comes as a result. Now he's got to cover his tracks.
He murders Uriah in order to do that. The same sort of thing is going on in 2 Samuel 13. Sin begets sin. As well, the nurturing, as I pointed out, of hatred affords opportunity for the devil.
Be angry and do not sin, Paul tells us. Do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil. James 1.20, he says, for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Now we need to appreciate, as we look at this passage, and I'm sure all of us can find some contentment in saying, well, I'm not an Amnon.
I got some issues, but I'm not an Amnon. And I've got issues, but I'm not an Absalom. And I got issues, but I'm not an inactive David. And I'm not a Jonadab.
And I try not to be around people like that. But in some sense, we really are. I mean, it may not have been fleshed out in the same manner, but those seeds are in all of our hearts. That's why we take time to look at passages like these, because if you look real hard, and I hate to suggest this, but if you look real hard at Absalom, you might see a little glimpse of yourself if you're not careful.
Paul tells us that prior to our conversion, we looked like this. For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another." Now Paul says that with reference to those who have been conquered by sovereign grace. The same Paul tells the people of God, actual believers, those in a church. He says, do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
If I asked you right now, you are not familiar whatsoever with Ephesians 4. If I said to you, what sins grieve the Holy Spirit? I guarantee you, you would not write down the sins that Paul indicates. You would say murder grieves the Holy Spirit.
You'd say adultery grieves the Holy Spirit. You'd say bank robbery grieves the Holy Spirit. Maybe, I can't speak for you, but when we think of grieving the Spirit, don't we have sort of some benchmark sins that we know are really bad? Like when I was a a papist growing up and somebody on Hollywood Boulevard told me I was a sinner.
I've never done anything really bad. I've never murdered or committed adultery. We somehow think that if we haven't murdered or committed adultery, somehow we're okay. Interesting that David committed murder and adultery and he was a man after God's own heart.
God really turns things over by his grace. But listen, do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, was that a major list? Grieving the Holy Spirit, bank robbery, yeah, adultery, yeah, methamphetamine, yeah, crack whores, yeah, but bitterness?
Is that the sin that we deal with? Jerry Bridges, before he died several years, well, a few years ago, wrote a book called Respectable Sins. Respectable Sins. I love that title.
What's it mean? We in the church have respectable sins. If you smoke meth, you're terrible. But if you're bitter, eh, it's no big deal, is it?
Because everybody's bitter, right? It's only the really bad people that smoke meth. I typically think it's the other way around. God really abhors the bitter spirit in the hearts of his people when they shouldn't be grieving the Holy Spirit but loving the people of God.
So he says, bitterness, wrath. Again, wrath there doesn't necessarily mean giving the order to your servants to kill Amnon. It may mean frowns or facial expressions or I'm not happy with you or whatever. Anger.
I mean, who of us doesn't get angry? Well, this grieves the Holy Spirit. There was a time in our church, brethren, and it's tough to even mention it. A couple of you know.
Back in the day, early on, I knew that they're not here anymore, so I'm not picking on anybody present, but there were people that I knew didn't get along with each other. You know how hard it is to try to preach the word of the living God when you know that so-and-so doesn't like so-and-so and so-and-so doesn't like... That's just not the environment to foster the ministry of the Holy Spirit. I mean, preaching the gospel with the hope that sinners get converted, we absolutely, positively need the Holy Spirit.
Because men can't do it. We can't change hearts. If the Holy Spirit doesn't come, everybody's going to go off to hell if they're not saved. And so, God, send the Holy Spirit.
And yet, within our own context, we're doing everything we can to chase him away. It just seems so counterproductive to me, and it seems so idiotic, because God gives us strategies so that this guy and this guy can get along together. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice." Evil speaking, speaking about others, gossiping, slander. Watch Paul's positive exhortation in verse 32, "...and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." Again, you might be wondering, what in the world does this have to do with Absalom?
The seeds in Absalom's heart are probably the same sorts of seeds in our heart. It's just a matter of, you know, what we do with those things. Cut off the wrath, the anger, the clamor, the bitterness, the evil speaking. Put it to death, brethren.
It's never going to advance the cause of Jesus Christ. Calvin said, We have long been far too guilty of this kind of behavior, but we nurse this wicked emotion, this hatred, this anger. He says, it dominates our hearts and the sun goes down on it, and then the devil takes possession of us. But we need to get rid of everything which can be used to incite us to vengeance.
He says, so let us learn not to nurse our vices, lest we give place to the devil. Don't nurse the vice. Cut it out. Rip it out.
Destroy it. Get it? That's what God says. Remember, Jesus told a little story that if your right hand caused you to stumble, talk to your right hand and say, don't you do that anymore.
No, he says, chop it off, metaphorically. Please don't chop your hands off. And please don't blog later and say, Butler told me. to do this. It's a metaphor to tell us how radically we're to deal with sin.
If your right eye causes you to sin, well, I wonder what Jesus had in mind. He's in the context of lust and all that. If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out, cast it far from you. It's better to enter into heaven named than to enter into hell with all of your appendages.
So we need to root it out. Let us learn not to nurse our vices lest we give place to the devil. And I love what he says here. For he already has too much advantage over us without our relaxing control over our emotions.
Thus, in this matter of vengeance, let us be careful not to gratify ourselves in it or flatter ourselves, but rather, if someone has angered us, let us fight until our wicked desires for vengeance are put to death. If you got Calvin on 2 Samuel, read him on this section. It's just fantastic.
David's Failure to Execute Justice
And then finally, the responsibility of David. It pains me to have to bring this out because David's like one of my huge heroes. But David messed up. David messed up.
I mean, the whole thing with Bathsheba and with Uriah, God through Nathan tells him in 12, 11, and 12, this is going to happen. The sword will not depart from your house. Adversity will rise up from your own home. Guess what's going to happen later with Absalom?
I mean, this is one good looking guy. This is a man whose head and shoulders, he's, you know, top of his head to the end of his feet. There's no blemish. He's gorgeous.
He cuts his hair every, every year and the weight of it is worth 200 shekels. I mean, this guy's amazing. So what does Absalom do? He stands at the gate and usurps the kingdom itself.
He leads Israel away. David has to flee from Jerusalem. I mean, this is the consequence for David's sin. We need to think through consequences of our sin.
I need to think through consequences for my sins. Not only the consequences spoken by Nathan in 12.11 and 12, but the failure to execute justice in the rape of Tamar. Verse 21, when David heard of all these things, he was very angry, but he didn't do anything. Davis says he holds the office of a magistrate.
One might say both in his kingdom and in his family. As both father and king, he is charged with maintaining justice, whether he is personally compromised or not. One may understand David's failure to act. One may not, however, excuse it.
So Amnon remains an unpunished felon, Tamar languishes as damaged goods, and Absalom becomes a seething vigilante. Ecclesiastes, Solomon said, because the sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil. When there is no government in terms of civil justice. This is what just pains me in the political debates.
We never talk about punishment of criminals. What happened to that? I asked a policeman at the gym the other day. I said, if somebody actually gets caught for breaking these windows, do they ever get made to pay for them?
Oh no, that's not even a thing anymore. I mean, wouldn't you just think if you damaged property and they caught you, you would have to pay it back? Don't even think that way. That's not even a concept anymore.
That's just not there. I mean, vis-a-vis our building, right? Do you think they're sending us checks every time we get windows broke? Oh, the bad guy got caught and here's your money.
No, they don't care. Because the sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily. Because David doesn't do what David's supposed to do, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil. Absalom's going to take matters into his own hand, and he's going to dispatch Amnon into the next life.
Brethren, the civil authority, I want them not in my life like they are, but I certainly want them there to punish criminal offenders. That's their job. And then finally, I know that was a finally, but we got four minutes, so that was a pastor, a preacher's finally. What has finally made nothing?
Longing for the Promised Messiah
The longing for the Messiah. 2 Samuel 13. The faithful in Israel would have read this and they would have said, we can't wait till the promised one comes. We can't wait for Jesus. We can't wait for the one promised in Genesis 3.15.
The one promised to us throughout Genesis. Genesis 49.10 in the Shiloh prophecy. We can't wait for that one that Exodus and Leviticus pointed to in terms of the sacrificial system. We can't wait for that one in Numbers that is the antitype for that brazen serpent that was raised up in the wilderness.
We can't wait for that one that Moses spoke of in Deuteronomy chapter 18 as that prophet that God would raise up from among your brethren. Him you shall hear. We can't wait for that one that David was supposed to typify, and he does, but he doesn't do it perfectly, which that doesn't necessarily, you know, it's not the case that a type has to perfectly correspond to the anti-type. Then there wouldn't be that differentiation, the type types for the anti-type.
But these people, reading 2 Samuel 13, would have probably stopped, bowed in prayer, and said, Thank you, Lord, that one is coming that will not engage in the sorts of things that we have seen gone on in this particular chapter. And that one is the Lord Jesus Christ, who in the fullness of the time, God sent him forth, born of a woman, born under the law, in order to redeem those who were under the law. So this, like all of the Old Testament, at least in some respect, points continually forward to the Lord Jesus Christ. Well, let us pray.
Closing Prayer
Father, we thank You for Your Word, and we thank You, God, for Your graciousness to us. And I pray that we would learn the lessons from Jonadab, and from Amnon, and from Absalom, and even David himself, and that we would seek by Your grace to guard our hearts against such things. Help us not to give place to the devil by letting the sun go down on our anger. Help us to deal with one another in faithfulness and in righteousness. and with love and kindness and compassion.
And our Father, we thank you for Jesus Christ. We know that if the kingdom were left in the hands of men, it would certainly never have progressed. But in the hands of Christ, he will build his church and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. We ask that you would go with us now and watch over us and help us, God, to honor you in the remainder of this week.
And we pray through Christ our Lord. Amen.