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2 Samuel 13, in the interest 
of full disclosure, this is an unsavory chapter of Scripture. 
It's probably not going to be the happiest Bible study that 
you've ever participated in. It is the record of the rape 
of Tamar. I want to read verses 1 to 22. We'll take up that section 
tonight. God willing, the rest of the 
chapter next week. 2 Samuel chapter 13, beginning 
in verse 1. After this, Absalom, the son 
of David, had a lovely sister, whose name was Tamar. And Amnon, 
the son of David, loved her. Amnon was so distressed over 
his sister Tamar that he became sick, for she was a virgin. And 
it was improper for Amnon to do anything to her. But Amnon 
had a friend whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah, David's brother. Now Jonadab was a very crafty 
man and he said to him, why are you, the king's son, becoming 
thinner day after day? Will you not tell me? Amnon said 
to him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister. So Jonadab 
said to him, lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And 
when your father comes to see you, say to him, please let my 
sister Tamar come and give me food, and prepare the food in 
my sight that I may see it and eat it from her hand. Then Amnon 
laid down and pretended to be ill. And when the king came to 
see him, Amnon said to the king, please let Tamar, my sister, 
come and make a couple of cakes for me in my sight that I may 
eat from her hand. And David sent home to Tamar, 
saying, Now go to your brother Amnon's house, and prepare food 
for him. So Tamar went to her brother 
Amnon's house, and he was lying down. And she took flour and 
kneaded it, made cakes in his sight, and baked the cakes. And 
she took the pan and placed them out before him, but he refused 
to eat. Then Amnon said, Have everyone 
go out from me. And they all went out from him. 
Then Amnon said to Tamar, Bring the food into the bedroom that 
I may eat from your hand. And Tamar took the cakes which 
she had made and brought them to Amnon her brother in the bedroom. 
Now when she had brought them to him to eat, he took hold of 
her and said to her, Come, lie with me, my sister. But she answered 
him, No, my brother, do not force me, for no such thing should 
be done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing. 
And I, where could I take my shame? And as for you, you would 
be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to 
the king, for he will not withhold me from you. However, he would 
not heed her voice, and being stronger than she, he forced 
her and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, 
so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than 
the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, Arise, 
be gone. So she said to him, No, indeed, 
this evil of sending me away is worse than the other that 
you did to me. But he would not listen to her. Then he called 
his servant who attended him and said, Here, put this woman 
out, away from me, and bolt the door behind her. Now she had 
on a robe of many colors, for the king's virgin daughters wore 
such apparel. And his servant put her out and 
bolted the door behind her. And Tamar put ashes on her head 
and tore her robe of many colors that was on her and laid her 
hand on her head and went away crying bitterly. And Absalom, 
her brother, said to her, has Amnon, your brother, been with 
you? But now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother. 
Do not take this thing to heart. So Tamar remained desolate in 
her brother Absalom's house. When King David heard of all 
these things, he was very angry. And Absalom spoke to his brother 
Amnon, neither good nor bad, for Absalom hated Amnon because 
he had forced his sister Tamar. Amen. Well, as I said, not a 
very happy chapter. It does indeed record for us 
the sinfulness of man. As the Bible elsewhere declares 
the glory of God, it certainly reveals also the sinfulness and 
the wretchedness and the depravity of man. So hopefully as we look 
at this passage tonight, we will be able to learn some things. 
I think there's a lot, actually a lot of practical lessons in 
this section for us. But I want to, before we begin 
with this particular portion, first have a bit of a reminder 
regarding rape and incest. That's probably not why you would 
come to a Bible study on a Wednesday night, even uttering such a thing. 
But it's important that we understand what's happening in this chapter. 
I mean, I read it, and we read it, and we know what's going 
on. There's some confusion, especially concerning a passage in Deuteronomy, 
that I think times like these are helpful for us to clear away, 
hopefully, some fog and confusion. You can turn to Deuteronomy chapter 
22. I think the enemies of the Lord God Most High oftentimes 
cite Deuteronomy 22 to try and show an inconsistency or a contradiction 
when it comes to legislation regarding rape. And essentially 
what we have in Deuteronomy chapter 22 verses 22 to 30 is a prohibition 
against all manner of sexual sin. In chapter 22, specifically 
verses 13 to 21, we have the charge of premarital unchastity. A man takes a bride and later 
finds out that perhaps, or he suspects that she was unfaithful 
prior to their marriage. That's dealt with in verses 13 
to 21. In verse 22, you see a prohibition 
against adultery. Again, a sin that is prohibited 
elsewhere in the Pentateuch. Then you have the seduction of 
a betrothed woman in verses 23 to 24, the rape of a betrothed 
woman in verses 25 to 27, and then the seduction of a single 
woman in verses 28 to 29. Now here's where the contradiction 
appears, or at least is believed to be there by the enemies of 
the cross. Notice in verses 23 and 24, it's 
dealing with the seduction of a betrothed woman, and that it 
is a capital offense, it's treated as a rape, and then in the seduction 
of a single woman in verses 28 to 29, she is not betrothed, 
she's single. There's no mandate for capital 
punishment on the part of the man that lie with her. And so 
some would say, well, it's wrong to rape a betrothed woman, but 
you can go ahead and rape a single woman. That's the discrepancy 
alleged by enemies of the Bible. And I think if you've never heard 
that, someday you may hear that. I think there's some faulty understanding 
among the people of God when it comes to this section. So 
I just want to work through it a little bit so we can get an 
understanding of what is going on here. Notice in verses 23 
to 24, it is the seduction of a betrothed woman. If a young 
woman who is a virgin is betrothed to a husband, and a man finds 
her in the city and lies with her, then you shall bring them 
both out to the gate of that city, and you shall stone them 
to death with stones. The young woman, because she 
did not cry out in the city, and the man, because he humbled 
his neighbor's wife, so you shall put away the evil from among 
you." I made a mistake, it's the next account. that is pitted 
against the third. But in this instance, notice 
what's going on. It is the seduction of a betrothed 
woman who is participating in this particular act. Betrothal 
was illegally binding, and the breach of it was constituted 
as adultery. Notice, in verses 23 and 24, 
she is betrothed, and then at the end of verse 24, it refers 
to his neighbor's wife. So, betrothal constituted the 
woman as a wife to the man. In this particular instance, 
she's betrothed to a man. Another man finds her in the 
city and he lies with her. Then you shall bring them both 
out to the gate of that city, and you shall stone them to death 
with stones." Notice, the young woman, because she did not cry 
out in the city, that indicates that she was a willing participant. 
If she had cried out, that would indicate that she was taken by 
force. The fact that she cried out, 
the fact that she did not seek assistance in this particular 
situation indicates that she was complicit in the matter, 
and so therefore both parties are subject to the death penalty. 
Notice the rape of a betrothed woman in verses 25 to 27. But 
if a man finds a betrothed young woman in the countryside, and 
the man forces her and lies with her, then only the man who lay 
with her shall die. But she shall do nothing to the 
young woman, There is in the young woman no sin deserving 
of death. For just as when a man rises 
against his neighbor and kills him, even so is this matter. For he found her in the countryside, 
and the betrothed young woman cried out, but there was no one 
to save her." So you see, that instant, she cries out. It just 
happens to be the case. Because they're in the countryside, 
there's nobody there to render support or aid to her. But she 
is not guilty in this instance. She is not wrong. I think at 
times in our culture, and there is a tendency among some to blame 
rape victims. Well, that's absolutely ungodly. You don't blame a murder victim. Why would you blame a rape victim? When a man seizes a woman against 
her will and violates her, The Pentateuch, the law of God here, 
indicates that this crime of rape is just as the sin of murder, 
and it's a heinous and a vicious and a vile thing. Now notice 
in verses 28 and 29, the seduction of a single woman. It says, if 
a man finds a young woman who is a virgin, who is not betrothed, 
so there's a difference here between that and the one preceding, 
and he seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out, 
then the man who lay with her shall give to the young woman's 
father fifty shekels of silver, and he shall be his wife because 
he has humbled her, or she shall be his wife because he has humbled 
her. He shall not be permitted to divorce her all his days. 
So you see the logic there. In verses 25 to 27, capital punishment 
if a betrothed woman is raped. No capital punishment in verses 
28 and 29 where an unbetrothed woman is allegedly raped. You 
see the difference? Everybody with me? You get this? 
Because the enemies of Christ say this. They say, how come 
It's capital punishment for a woman who's betrothed, but when it 
comes to a woman who's not betrothed, all the guy has to do is marry 
her. That seems like a big disparity, 
doesn't it? Well, if we investigate verses 
28 and 29 more fully, we will see it's not a case of rape. 
This woman, as well, is a willing participant in this particular 
situation. The woman is not betrothed, but 
she is a virgin. Notice the verb is used here, 
seizes her. It's different than the verb 
used in verse 25. In verse 25, we see in the man 
forces her and lies with her. In verse 28, he seizes her and 
lies with her. Now, the NIV is wrong. to interpret 
this as rape. It is not rape. It's not a matter 
of her being forced. He seizes her. It doesn't sound 
like the most pleasant verb to be sure, but it's not the forcing. And then notice the next clause. 
It says, are found out. If it was just the man who was 
engaged in criminal activity, it would say, and if he is found 
out. But she is a willing participant 
in this, so there is no disparity, there is no discrepancy, there's 
no crime of rape present in verses 28 and 29. So, no problem. The Mosaic legislation is not 
contradictory. There's not different sets of 
rules for different castes in society. The law of God applies 
equally. The particular instance, however, 
is one is a case of rape and the other is not a case of rape. As well, we need to understand 
what the scripture says concerning incest, because what we have 
with Tamar is not simply rape, it is a case of incestual rape. And the law of God prohibits 
that. Leviticus 18, 9-11. Leviticus 
20, 17. And while you're still in Deuteronomy, 
Deuteronomy 27, 22. just to see what scripture says 
concerning the background of what occurs in 2 Samuel 13. Notice in Deuteronomy 27.22, 
Cursed is the one who lies with his sister, the daughter of his 
father, or the daughter of his mother. You see, it's specific. It's not simply we both have 
the same parents, we both have a father or a mother in Comet, 
and that's what's going on in 2 Samuel 17. So the applicability, 
obviously, in 2 Samuel 13 is the relationship between Amnon 
and Tamar. They had different mothers, but 
they had the same father, namely David. One man says, remarks 
that this brief narrative in 2 Samuel 13 contains no less 
than 11 repetitions on the word brother and 8 of the word sister, 
highlighting the family relationships of the individuals involved in 
the narrative. And as well, 2 Samuel 13, 14 
clearly indicates the force used by Amnon in order to rape Tamar. So that's the background, and 
what we find in 2 Samuel 13 is a heinous violation of God's 
law when it comes to this matter of sexual ethics. So back to 
2 Samuel 13. Let's look at this particular 
account under several headings. First, the desire on Amnon's 
part. Secondly, the assistance of Jonadab. Thirdly, the act committed by 
Amnon. And then fourthly, the aftermath, 
what occurs after the fact. Note first the desire on Amnon's 
part in verses 1 and 2. After this Absalom the son of 
David had a lovely sister whose name was Tamar and Amnon the 
son of David loved her. Amnon was so distressed over 
his sister Tamar that he became sick for she was a virgin and 
it was improper for Amnon to do anything to her. The after 
this goes along with what we've already seen. Gill defines it 
this way. After the sin with Bathsheba 
his repentance for it, and pardon of it, and the birth of Solomon 
as a token of reconciliation. Yet after all this, the divine 
threatenings must take place. They had begun already in the 
death of the child begotten by adultery, and others here follow." 
Remember, God, through Nathan, said the sword would not depart 
from David's house. God, through the prophet Nathan, 
said that there would be adversity that would rise up from David's 
own family, and that God, through Nathan the prophet, said that 
David's own wives would be publicly defiled in Israel. Sin has its 
consequences, and temporally we see it already enacted in 
this particular account. This is a result, causally, to 
what David had accomplished, or what David had done previously, 
and you cannot miss the similarities. You cannot miss the fact that 
Amnon rapes Tamar. He goes into a woman that is 
not his wife. That is precisely what David 
does with reference to Bathsheba. This then incenses Absalom, who 
goes on a campaign to rid the earth of Ammon. Amnon. He hatches 
this particular plan and later in the chapter he executes the 
plan by executing Amnon. The same sorts of things that 
David did when it came to dealing with Uriah. You cannot miss the 
connection that is given to us in this instance. Now notice 
her identification. She is the sister of Absalom, 
which does mean she is the sister of Amnon by a different mother. Amnon, according to 2 Samuel 
3.3, was David's firstborn son by Ahinoam, and Absalom was David's 
son by Maacah. And Tamar was beautiful. The 
text describes that for us, it indicates that for us. And Robert 
Alter makes this observation, connecting it again with the 
scene in 2 Samuel 11. He says, the catastrophic turn 
in David's fortune began when he saw a beautiful woman and 
lusted after her. Now the curse pronounced by Nathan 
on the house of David begins to unfold through the very same 
mechanism, a sexual transgression within the royal quarters resulting 
in an act of murder. So the very same sort of thing 
that David does is fleshed out in the judgment of God in terms 
of David's sin or the consequences for David's sin. Describes Amnon's 
love for Tamar. The chapter or the section begins 
with the love of Amnon for Tamar and it ends in verse 22 with 
Absalom's hatred for Amnon. Now we know as we work through 
this chapter that this is not love. We know, as we work through 
this chapter, that lust is not love. Amnon is a man who's governed 
by his genitals. He has no desire whatsoever to 
express love to Tamar. There is nothing, 1 Corinthians 
13-ish, about whatever it is that Amnon feels towards Tamar. He is a man with unbridled passion, 
a man with godless lust, a man who is desiring to satisfy that 
lust by using and abusing his own sister. He is distressed 
over this situation. I mean, in some senses, drips 
with irony. Here's a man who's about to hatch 
an amazingly large crime, and he's just sick to his stomach, 
because he cannot lie with his sister. It was improper for Amnon 
to do anything to her. Now note the assistance of Jonadab. Jonadab in some ways is scarier 
than Amnon. I mean, with Amnon, what you 
see is what you get. With Jonadab, he's a crafty man, 
he's a shrewd man, he's a wise man, but he's a wise man without 
principle. And that can be a very scary 
thing. It's like handing a chimp a monkey. You don't know where 
the monkey is going to point the gun and shoot. And this is 
what we have with Jonadab. Note the text in verse 3. Amnon 
had a friend whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother. 
So he happens to be cousin to both Tamar and to Amnon. I mean, imagine having a cousin 
like this that facilitates a brutal rape of another cousin. And then at the end of verse 
3 it says, now, John Adab was a very crafty man. It's literally 
he was a very wise man. Now, the versions pick up well 
on it. The New King James and the ESV have very crafty. The NIV has very shrewd. Those are good glosses on the 
translation, because he is wise, that is certain, and that's what 
the author tells us, but it's a wisdom that isn't governed. 
It's a wisdom that isn't hedged in. It's a wisdom that's reckless, 
as we see in this particular chapter, and I think as we'll 
learn later on. Notice specifically, he is his 
friend, he is his counselor, he is a cousin to both, and he 
is literally a wise man. He gives this particular counsel 
to Amnon. And he said to him, verse 4, 
why are you, the king's son, becoming thinner day after day? 
Will you not tell me? Amnon said to him, I love Tamar, 
my brother Absalom's sister. Catch that? See what Amnon does? She's my brother Absalom's sister. Not my sister. Not one that is 
close to me. He's distancing himself. Isn't 
this what sinners do? There's a disassociation going 
on. It's his sister. It's not my 
sister. Because for him to say, I want 
to have sexual relations with my sister, Well, that just doesn't 
have the same ring to it that it does in this particular situation. I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's 
sister. Now, I know it's still the same, 
my brother Absalom's sister, but throughout the narrative, 
and in fact when he appeals to David, who does he say? Does 
he say, David, I want you to send my brother Absalom's sister? 
No, there it's the intimate, my sister, of course she'll send 
my sister to alleviate my suffering and to make those little cakes 
that I like and to serve me from her own hand. I mean, it's a 
my sister sort of episode until Amnon wants to disassociate himself 
or try to distance himself from the actual wickedness of the 
evil that is going on in this situation. As Gil says, the more 
to cover his ill design upon her. I love Tamar, my brother 
Absalom's sister. Now notice the continual counsel 
of Jonadab. Lie down on your bed and pretend 
to be ill. And when your father comes to 
see you, say to him, please let my sister Tamar come and give 
me food and prepare the food in my sight that I may see it 
and eat it from her hand. This is the particular plan. 
Now it's ambiguous. We can't conclude specifically 
that Jonadab is trying to set up a rape, but we can conclude 
that he may be trying at least to set up an intimate connection 
between Amnon and Tamar. I mean such that they would engage 
in this illicit relationship. So Jonadab He doesn't say, I 
think you ought to force her and rape her, but he does cook 
up this story so that Tamar will come along and will be alone 
with Amnon so that he can carry out his particular deed. The 
Geneva Bible says concerning Amnon's seeking counsel from 
Jonadab, here we see that there is no enterprise so wicked that 
can lack counsel to further it. In other words, if we want to 
engage in wickedness, we will find counselors that will help 
us and aid us and abet us in executing our wickedness. Now 
notice, thirdly, the act committed by Amnon in verses 6 to 14. He pretends illness. He lay down. He pretends to be sick. And when 
the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, This indicates 
something of David's fidelity and David's paternal instincts. 
We saw in the last chapter when that child conceived in adultery 
was about to die, what does David do? David fasts, David prays, 
David goes in that state for seven days. David loved his children. You know, when all this happens 
and David finds out about it, I'm going to, you know, pick 
on him a little bit tonight, but it hurt him. He was angry. He was very angry. If any father 
had heard of such goings on in his house, this would certainly 
be an offense to them. But in this instance, David comes 
to visit Amnon as he hears that he is sick. And Amnon says, let 
Tamar, my sister, come and make a couple of cakes for me in my 
sight that I may eat from her hand. As far as David is concerned, 
this doesn't sound fishy. I wouldn't imagine any father 
in this vantage point would think that he's trying to conceive 
a plan in order to rape Tamar or in order to have relations 
with Tamar. As far as David is concerned, this is legit. Here's 
a sick son. The son wants his sister to come, 
make those cakes that he likes, feed him so that hopefully he'll 
get strong again. So David willingly complies. 
Verse 7, David sent home to Tamar saying, now go to your brother 
Amnon's house and prepare food for him. It is intriguing that 
he is a vital link in this whole process. It was David that dispatched 
Tamar to go and see Amnon. I'm certain if it were me later 
on, I would have mused on that and reflected upon that and thought, 
man, I wish I'd have never done that. I don't know if David had 
that sort of a mindset later on, but it is unfortunate that 
David was the one who sent Amnon to his house. Now notice in verse 
8, so Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house, and he was lying 
down. She took flour and kneaded it, made cakes in his sight. 
These are called heart cakes, or the wording is heart cakes. I don't know if they were shaped 
like a heart or if they were something to strengthen the heart or whatever 
it was, but she makes them and then she feeds it to them and 
then Amnon gives this particular order. Notice verse 9, Amnon 
said, have everyone go out from me and they all went out from 
him. Robert Alter links this story 
to the Joseph narrative and quite ably. There's a lot of parallels 
between the Joseph narrative and what's going on in this particular 
instance. And he picks up on this phrase, 
have everyone go out from me. He says the identical words are 
pronounced by another prince-like figure, Joseph, just before he 
reveals his true identity to his brothers in Genesis 45.1. He says in Genesis these words 
preface the great moment of reconciliation between long estranged brothers. Here, they are a prelude to a 
tale of fraternal rape that leads to fratricide. Fratricide, of 
course, is the murder of a brother. So there is a parallel but a 
big contrast in terms of this phrase, have everyone go out 
from me. The Geneva Bible makes the observation 
that men are willing to do in front of God what they're not 
willing to do in front of men. He is going to try and have relations 
with Tamar and he wants to excuse men, but he'll do it in the full 
sight of God Most High. That's an interesting and curious 
thing about sinners as well. What we would never do before 
another human being, we will do before God Most High. We will 
engage in utter wickedness and depravity and acts of vile things 
in front of God. Persons, no, but God, yes. And this is precisely what's 
happening here. He wants them to go. They all 
went out from him. And then Amnon says to Tamar, 
bring the food into the bedroom that I may eat from your hand. Again, at this point, Tamar is 
not suspecting. You know, people could say, Tamar, 
don't go into his bedroom. As far as she knows, he's her 
brother and he's sick and this is medicine to help treat him. So, you know, to jump all over, 
you know, Tamar and say, well, you shouldn't have gone into 
his bedroom. I mean, it's probably a good rule of thumb that you 
don't go into another man's bedroom. But in this instance, she doesn't 
have a clue what's going on. So Amnon invites her in and then 
Tamar took the cakes which she had made and brought them to 
Amnon her brother in the bedroom. Now when she had brought them 
to her to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, come lie 
with me. Note the language. sister. Lie with me, my sister." Now 
it's all become apparent to Tamar what is happening in this particular 
instance. This is wretched. Deuteronomy 
22, that's the law of God Most High. Leviticus 18, Leviticus 
20, Deuteronomy 27, 22. Incestual rape is condemned by 
God, and this is what Amnon desires. Well, at this particular point, 
he's hoping for a consensual incest. He's hoping that she 
will join him when he says, come lie with me, my sister. Now, 
note the response of Tamar. This is brilliant, the way that 
she responds to him. In the first place, she reminds 
him of their status. She says, no, my brother. Brother 
should have crushed him. I mean, he's already said sister, 
but obviously it doesn't mean anything to him anymore. But 
when he hears her say, my brother, this is a reminder of their familial 
status. This is a reminder of Leviticus 
18, Leviticus 20, Deuteronomy 27. You're not supposed to have 
relations with a brother or a sister. Notice, secondly, she entreats 
him. Notice, do not do this disgraceful 
thing. Literally, it's do not do this 
godless thing. It's sort of the idea of Nabalism. Remember that fellow Nabal? We 
often translate it as fool. It can be translated as godless. See, when Nabal is called a fool 
or when Amnon here is called a fool. It's not somebody that 
does foolish things, like they slam the door on their thumb, 
or they fall down when there's nothing in their way. It's not 
that kind of fool. The Bible connotes something 
ethical in nature. It is a godless man. And this 
is her appeal to him. Do not do this godless thing. Notice, then, she highlights 
the shame involved in the act. She says, where could I take 
my shame? So you have to understand, as we move through this particular 
narrative, what he does to her is essentially ruin her. She 
is trapped, she is ignored, she is raped, she is despised, she 
is banished, and ultimately she's a ruined woman. She ends up living 
with her brother Absalom. Now again, in the grand scheme 
of things, it's not the worst thing in the world for a woman 
to live with her brother. I'm not suggesting that, you 
know, that's the end of life. But in Old Covenant Israel, what 
was the hope of every young Israelite girl was to get married and to 
have babies. I mean, that is it. And he ruined 
that. He destroyed her in this particular 
instance, and she understood that if this occurred, if she 
consented, it would be a shameful thing, obviously, and it would 
be a lawless thing. But as well, if she does not 
consent and he goes through with it, it will bring great shame 
to her. That's why later she essentially 
says, don't send me away because when you send me away it's going 
to be even worse than what you did initially. Again, you've 
got to think like an old covenant Israelite woman. We will look 
at that and say, you've got to run right to the police and get 
them checked and have CIS in there and check for evidence 
and deal with them. But in this instance or in this 
context, it was the shame that would arise that would ultimately 
be that which ruined her for the rest of her life. And then 
notice the effect upon Amnon himself. She says, and as for 
you, you would be like one of the fools in Israel, one of the 
Nabals, one of the godless. You've got to think through this. 
Again, I think this passage highlights something to us about the strength 
of temptation. Notice that it can't be reasoned 
with. It can't be bargained with. It can't be presented arguments 
in favor of not following through. There comes a point in the time 
when a man or a woman enters that realm of temptation when 
they're going to do what they're going to do. Arguments, contrary, 
not I would suggest that what Tamar presents here is a quite 
sufficient sermon on why Amnon should seek to preserve his sexual 
purity in the matter concerning his sister Tamar. But no, he's 
got this bee in his bonnet, he's got this lust inflamed in his 
heart, he's got this passion that is now governing him and 
driving him, he won't be reasoned with. He won't listen. Doesn't 
matter about her shame. Doesn't matter about his shame. 
Doesn't matter about her life. Doesn't matter about her future. 
All that matters at the moment for this wretched man is to gratify 
his own carnal lusts. probably take what? I don't know, 
how many minutes will this take? And it will have lifelong ramifications. See, I don't think persons really 
think through the ramifications of sexual sin. I'm certain they 
don't when they shoot people in the head for no good reason 
either. But sexual sin seems to be rampant in our culture. 
In fact, Amnon would be making music videos in our day. Amnon 
would be selling records in our day. Amnon would be, you know, 
big in iTunes on our day. I mean, isn't that the culture 
in so much of the popular music and movies is a celebration of 
gratifying the lusts? of pursuing that which is most 
special and most endearing to you? You see, this temptation 
cannot be reasoned out of him, and he is going to engage. Notice, finally, she appeals 
to the king. Notice, the end of verse 13, 
now, therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not 
withhold me from you. Now, Tamar knew better, I suspect. Tamar had to know Leviticus 18, 
Leviticus 20, and Deuteronomy 27, 22. Tamar knew it was wrong 
for a brother and a sister to engage in sexual sin and as well 
to get married. But Tamar makes this appeal probably 
grasping at straws. And if, for chance, Amnon snaps 
out of it, then when they go to the king to make this proposition, 
then he... Tamar is certain that the king 
will, you know, put the brakes on this. You can't marry your 
sister, son. That's just not done in Israel. The pagans might do it, but that's 
not how Yahweh has called us to live and how He's called us 
to operate. So she is probably grasping at 
straws here in order to prevent this. And so Josephus and most 
other commentators, Tamar is desperately struggling to prevent 
Amnon's rape. She is clutching at straws in 
an emergency and cannot be expected to speak as a paradigm of legal 
precision. We don't come to Tamar and say, 
well, don't you know about Leviticus 18 and 20? Don't you know about 
Deuteronomy 27, 22? Don't you know it's wrong for 
us? That's not the point. The point is, she is screaming 
at Amnon to stop. Stop. Stop. Don't do this sin. Don't engage in this. We will 
appeal to the king. If it's his good pleasure, he 
will let you have me. But he doesn't stop. Sin, once 
it enters into the heart of a man, Nigh impossible to root out. 
Well, it is impossible. Isn't that the whole reason for 
the gospel? I mean, Jesus didn't come to live and die and rise 
again because we have the ability to deal with sin. Jesus came 
to live, die, and rise again because we don't have the ability 
to deal with sin. He came to save us from our sins 
and to enable us to deal with our sins in a way that is consistent. And then the center portion of 
the narrative is verse 14, unfortunately. I mean, if you diagram or structure 
this out in what's called a chiasm, where the several portions of 
the text sort of work together, verse 14 is the center. However, he would not heed her 
voice, and being stronger than she, he forced her and lay with 
her." It's a terrible crime that had been committed in David's 
household in 2 Samuel chapter 13. It's a brief description. The Bible's not about celebrating 
wickedness and godlessness, but at the same time, it's not about 
not telling us about sin and depravity and wretchedness and 
wickedness. So that's the rape of Tamar. 
Now note the aftermath. Verses 15 to 17, the exchange 
between Amnon and Tamar. Then Amnon hated her with a very 
great hatred. So that the hatred with which 
he hated her. What's the emphasis? He hated 
her, so he never loved her to begin with. It was lust, vile, 
wicked, base lust. But the text could not be more 
conspicuous on how his attitude changed toward her. Then Amnon 
hated her with a very great hatred, so that the hatred with which 
he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved 
her. And Amnon said to her, arise, be gone. This man is an absolute 
wretch. Working through this passage 
today, I was not a part of the Amnon fan club. In fact, the 
guy really, really, really bugs me. The intense hatred he had 
for her. Note the complete disrespect 
in his dealings with her. Arise, be gone, a Jewish commentator 
observes. the exact antonyms in reverse 
order of the two imperative verbs of sexual invitation he used 
before. Before it's come, lie. Now it's 
arise, go. I am done with you. I have gotten 
what I wanted from you. I am going to hate you with a 
very great hatred, and that hate is going to far surpass any supposed 
love that I had before. I just want you out of here, 
is what he says to her. She makes an appeal to Amnon. 
Notice what he says, or she says in verse 16. So she said to him, 
no indeed, this evil of sending me away is worse than the other 
that you did to me. Again, I don't think she's thinking 
rationally at this particular point. I don't know that she 
thinks that, hey, we can go ahead and get married and pay the 50 
shekels to dad and promise never to divorce. It almost seems like 
she's invoking what we saw there in Deuteronomy 22. But it's not 
applicable because this was incest. You can't do this. The only thing 
I can reckon is that she's just been raped. She's not got all 
her faculty. She's not thinking like a theologian. She's not, you know, one of the 
Jewish commentators, one of the Christian commentators working 
with the text of scripture while they're, you know, drinking coffee 
in the warmth of their study. She just got rained. She is shaking. She is disgraced. She is in a 
bad state, but she does nevertheless make this appeal Now note what 
this bulwark of wretchedness does. He would not listen to 
her, verse 16. Then he called his servant who 
attended him and said, here, put this woman out away from 
me and bolt the door behind her. If you have the New King James, 
you'll notice that woman is in italics. That means it's supplied. Literally, what Amnon says is, 
get this out. He doesn't even show her the 
respect of referring to her as a woman. Get this out. You're starting to understand 
why in Deuteronomy 22 it likens the crime of rape to murder. It's just as the crime of murder. I truly believe that with every 
fiber of my being. It is to murder, in a certain 
sense, a human being. He doesn't have the respect, 
the bare minimum, the shred of decency to refer to her as this 
woman. No, it's get this out, away from 
me, and bolt the door behind her. Here's a guy that was pretending 
to be sick, lying in his bed, whining to whoever would hear 
him, so that he could get Tamar to enter into his room. And now 
he hates her with a very great hatred, a hatred that far surpasses 
the supposed love that he has, and he says, get this out and 
bolt the door, because I want to see nothing of her ever again. 
It's an absolute terrible situation that this woman faces here. Notice the conduct of Tamar in 
verses 18 to 19. Mourning, desolation, and living 
with Absalom. Again, not the worst thing to 
live with your brother if that's what's got to happen, but in 
this instance it's a terrible thing. It's a horrible thing. 
Now note the response by Absalom in verses 20 and 22. In verse 
20, Absalom, her brother, said to her, I think this shows some 
tenderness on the part of Absalom. We're probably not going to like 
Absalom in a few weeks, but right now let's appreciate Absalom's 
kindness to his sister. Has Amnon, your brother, been 
with you? Not has Amnon, your brother, 
raped you? Not, has Amnon your brother violated you? Not, has 
your brother Amnon engaged in incestual... No, he doesn't say 
that. He says, has your brother been with you? But now hold your 
peace, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take 
this thing to heart. So he minimizes, at least for 
the moment, the particular sin. He says, this is your brother. 
Don't take it to heart. Well, we know why Absalom is 
doing this. Absalom has a heart full of rage, 
and a heart full of hatred, and a heart designed with vengeance 
in mind. So he wants her to stay the course, 
just be silent, don't make a fuss, don't go public, don't take this 
out into the court. We're gonna handle this. So Tamar 
remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house, and then notice 
in verse 22, Absalom spoke to his brother Amnon, neither good 
nor bad, for Absalom hated Amnon because he had forced his sister 
Tamar. And that leads inevitably into 
the following section in chapter 13. Well, notice the response 
by David in verse 21. But when King David heard of 
all these things, he was very angry. OK, that's good. He should be very angry, right? But shouldn't he do something 
else? Shouldn't he punish? Shouldn't he adjudicate? Shouldn't 
he deal? If you notice in your margin 
in the New King James, the LXX, which is the Septuagint, or the 
Greek translation of the Old Testament, they add a clause. 
Actually, it's not indicated in our margin, but it indicates 
that because he really loved Amnon, because he was his firstborn. 
It's sort of an explanatory note as to why David was angry, but 
he didn't do anything. I don't think the explanatory 
note should be there. I think the text is punctuated 
in such a way so that we understand and learn something about David. When King David heard of all 
these things, he was very angry. It was good that David would 
be angry, wouldn't it? I mean, if you're a father and 
this happened in your home, you would be very angry, I suspect. But he was unresponsive. He didn't 
do anything. And he should have done something. 
He should have executed some justice or some judgment. I mean, 
isn't this what marked David's reign? 2 Samuel 8, 15, so David 
reigned over all Israel and David administered judgment and justice 
to all his people. except those in his own family, 
except his own precious little Tamar. His little daughter had 
just been violated by his son, his firstborn son. He's very 
angry, and in that we congratulate you, David. And well, you should 
have been very angry, but you should have lowered the boom 
on Amnon. You should have done something. 
You should have executed some of that justice and that judgment 
that all Israel has seen, but your own family isn't seeing. 
Some have suggested that David did not act because of his own 
lack of moral authority. In other words, how could David 
execute judgment in a situation that so closely paralleled his 
own situation? Which is a reason, brethren, 
why we ought to strive to maintain a conscience void of offense 
toward God and men. I mean, if we're parents, we 
ought to seek to not be hypocrites so that we have the moral authority 
to impose upon them standards and bring judgment and justice 
to bear upon them when they violate. May it never be the case. What 
about you? What about you? What about this? 
What about that? Perhaps that was in the back 
of David's mind. I have no moral authority to 
correct this, and so therefore I'm going to be very angry, but 
I'm not going to do anything about it. Davis addresses this. He says, of course, legions of 
expositors say that David found himself a prisoner of his own 
folly. After all, how could he call Amnon to account when he 
himself had violated Bathsheba and eliminated her husband? Hardly 
a solid basis for exercising moral authority. He says, and 
yet such an argument does not negate David's responsibility. 
He holds nevertheless the office of a magistrate, one might say, 
both in his kingdom and in his family. As both father and king, 
he is charged with maintaining justice, whether he is personally 
compromised or not. One may understand David's failure 
to act. One may not, however, excuse 
it. So, Amnon remains an unpunished 
felon, Tamar languishes as damaged goods, and Absalom becomes a 
seething vigilante. You see, David had the potential 
to at least head off at the pass some further sin. I mean, sin 
had been conducted or had been executed, but had he punished 
it and dealt with it, it would have at least headed off at the 
pass the following sin when Absalom takes justice into his own hands 
and dispatches with Amnon and gets rid of him. So you see David, 
to be commended for being very angry, but not in terms of his 
lack of activity. Well, that's, as I said, a pretty 
unsavory chapter of Scripture when we ask the question, what 
can we learn from it? I hope we've learned something. 
But in the first place, we ought to see the consequences of David's 
sin and its real-life personal effects on individual people. 
Again, I don't think we do this. I mean, you know, when Amnon's 
doing what he's doing or when David's doing what he's doing, 
they're not thinking 10 steps down the road saying, wait a 
minute, if I do that, then this might happen. We need to think 
that way. If I as a husband, or I as a 
father, or I as a mother, or I as a wife, or I as a child, 
or I as a worker, or I as this, or I as that, if I engage in 
this activity, then what's going to happen, or what is that going 
to mean to people down the road? I mean, Tamar's wrecked, right? She's in bad shape. The chapter 
does not end with her on a high and positive note. Absalom is 
destined to fail. I mean, he's got rage in his 
heart. He's not in a good position whatsoever. Amnon is going to 
meet his maker in the not too distant future as a result. See, 
David didn't think about that. He looked upon Bathsheba and 
he saw that she was beautiful and all he thought about was 
his lust. And then after engaging in that act of adultery, David 
didn't think about, well, if I continue to compound my sin, 
then it could mean trouble or spell trouble for my family later. 
No, I've got to get rid of Uriah, because Uriah is sort of a bump 
in the road to my happiness with Bathsheba. You see, we need to 
think this way. We need to think in terms of 
the consequences of sin. Now, if we are actually in Christ, 
We are believers in Him. In terms of the eternal consequences, 
they have been satisfied. The Lord Christ has bore our 
sin on the cross. He has satisfied divine justice 
through His own sufferings. That is the heart of the atonement. 
But brethren, as redeemed sinners, when we sin, there are oftentimes 
great consequences as a result. Again, we can't take an always 
direct cause and effect sort of a thing. It was the case that 
God took the baby that was born in adultery to David and Bathsheba. He doesn't always do that. You 
don't find formulas applied to Yahweh. You don't find 2 plus 
2 equals Yahweh. He will baffle your mind, and 
He will baffle your expectations, and you need to understand that. 
But the general overarching principle is that when I sin, there will 
be consequences. It may not be public, it may 
not be as much a spectacle, it may not be in 2 Samuel 13 for 
all of our posterity to read, but there will be consequences. 
So we need, by the Spirit, to mortify the deeds of the body. 
Secondly, the lessons afforded by the characters. I think most 
of you know me well enough to know that I'm not the sort of 
guy that likes to look for moral lessons in people in the Bible. 
I think as they are there and they're obvious, we should take 
them as they are here. But the Bible's about God, it's 
about His glory, it's about His honor. you know, dare to be a 
Daniel and therefore go stand among lions. I don't think some 
of that exemplary preaching is always in the right vein in terms 
of what's called redemptive historical preaching. But I don't think 
that the author wants us to miss what he's telling us about this 
cast of characters. In the first place, you have 
the godlessness of Amnon. He is filled with lust rather 
than love. I mean, talk about a man governed 
by his lusts. You ever have, you know, a situation 
where you know someone or you're struggling? Amnon would be a 
great place to take yourself and read, this is what happens 
to somebody who always wants to get their way. This is what 
happens to somebody who can't control themselves sexually. 
This is what happens to people that are not exercising the fruit 
of the Spirit, which is self-control. Secondly, we have the craftiness 
of Jonadab. He is possessed with wisdom, 
but he has none of the other traits to make it helpful. I 
mean, he's a sharp guy. He's a bright fellow. He is wise, 
but it's a crafty wisdom. It's a cunning. It's a shrewdness. John Calvin said this concerning 
Jonadab, Therefore, when we see that the Spirit of God stated 
here as a reproach that Jonadab was a prudent man, and that he 
so forgot himself as to be pimp for his male cousin, disgrace 
his female cousin, and be disloyal to his uncle the king, It warns 
us to pray that if God has given us some prudence, He would also 
add integrity and sincerity so that we may keep ourselves from 
craftiness. I think that's a good way to 
pray. If you have the smallest semblance of wisdom, pray that 
God will give you integrity and sincerity. Doesn't Jesus combine 
these two traits? We must be gentle as what? As 
doves, but cunning as serpents. What happens if we're only gentle 
as doves? We're not going to be effective 
for our Lord. What if we're cunning as serpents, but we have no gentleness? 
We need both. We need a good, godly, healthy 
mixture of those principles and traits. Thirdly, we have the 
inactivity of David. He's very angry. Yes, but he 
is devoid of justice. He doesn't execute his role as 
the governor, as the king, as the legislator, as the servant 
of God Most High over the kingdom. He just remains inactive. And then we have the unrestrained 
hatred of Absalom. He's filled with hatred. I mean, 
brethren, we read the text. Absalom spoke to his brother 
Amnon neither good nor bad, for Absalom hated Amnon because he 
had forced his sister Tamar. Now you say, okay, that would 
be natural. That would be obvious. You know, 
you would hate him. Two years goes by. One of the 
reasons why I divvied this up a little bit, because if we just 
go on into the text, we forget that for two years Absalom's 
been harboring this. For two years Absalom's strategizing. For two years Absalom's biding 
his time, waiting for his opportunity until he can strike and kill 
Amnon dead. So you see what the results of 
sin are and the lessons afforded by these characters. And then 
finally, I think a question that at least Christians in the church 
today might be inclined to ask is, well, where is God in all 
of this? I mean, this is an unsavory chapter, 
am I right? This is a tough chapter of scripture. 
It is tough to work through, it's tough to talk about, it's 
tough to bring to people that don't typically think about incestual 
rape. Brethren, where is God? I mean, 
this is one of those godless chapters, not just because of 
the conduct of godless Amnon, but because of the absence of 
God. There's no good from God in this passage. There's no, 
but they all blessed the Lord. There's no overruling sort of 
statement that, but God nevertheless waved his magic wand and they 
all lived happily ever after. So often Christians are tempted 
to go, well, isn't this kind of stuff going to destroy the 
kingdom? Well, we know it doesn't because there's a 2 Samuel 14 
to Revelation 22. So it obviously doesn't destroy 
the kingdom, but we ask the question, where is God in the midst of 
such things? I want to read a lengthy quote 
from Davis because I think that he summarizes this well. Yahweh 
had told David that the sword would not depart from your house 
and that he was raising up disaster against you from your own house, 
12, 10, and 11. Is this not what has begun to 
happen in chapter 13? See, what Davis is going to say, 
I'm just going to paraphrase him here, is that God is present 
in judgment just as much as God is present in blessing. See, 
we Christians only tend to see God when, you know, showers of 
blessing are falling on our heads. We can't help but see God then. 
But those periods of darkness or judgment, we, where's God? What's happened to God? It never 
dawns on us that the same God who sends showers of blessing 
also sends arrows of judgment. I mean, doesn't Job correct his 
wife this way? Job's wife is whining, moaning, 
grumbling, complaining, has the gall to tell her husband to curse 
God and die. And what does Job say? Shall 
we receive blessing from his hand and not adversity? God is 
as much present in 2 Samuel 13 as he is in 2 Samuel 7. Listen 
to Davis. Many have pointed out the appropriateness 
of the disaster. Amnon's sexual escapade with 
Tamar corresponded to David's with Bathsheba, and Absalom's 
contrived murder of Amnon paralleling David's of Uriah. In this sordid 
episode, then, Yahweh is fulfilling his word of judgment against 
the house of David. Humanly speaking, everything 
seems to be going amok, yet Yahweh is fulfilling His Word. Not that 
it is pleasant, anything but, yet Yahweh has not hung out a 
vacancy sign over His universe or His people. He is there, bringing 
His Word to pass. And I love this last statement. 
Sometimes only that assurance keeps His people sane. So even in adversity, and even 
in judgment, and even in a chapter as sordid and as wretched and 
as vile as 2 Samuel 13, God is everywhere present. He had promised 
through Nathan to bring judgment, and in 2 Samuel 13, He brings 
judgment. So we ought never, as God's people, 
to conclude or ask, where is God? We should see Him not only 
in the blessing, but we should see Him in adversity as well. 
Well, let us pray. Father, we thank You for Your 
Word, and we thank You for Your graciousness to us, God. As we 
read accounts like these, as we read Scriptures that describe 
the sinfulness of man, as we reflect upon our own hearts prior 
to our conversion, and yea, God, even after our conversion, We 
are amazed at Your grace and the fact that You have saved 
us, the fact that You have forgiven us, the fact that You will keep 
us and bring us unto that blessed eternal state. And we look forward 
to that time when we will be confirmed in righteousness, where 
there will be no more sin. And we will serve You, Father, 
Son, and Holy Spirit, with all of our heart and soul and mind 
and strength. May You hasten the day, Lord 
God. We pray with John, even so come, Lord Jesus. And we pray 
this in His most blessed name. Amen.