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welcome to everyone it's good to be back in the house of our God you can turn with me in your Bibles to Psalm 128 for our call to worship Psalm 128 I'll begin reading in verse one a song of asense blessed is everyone who fears the Lord who walks in his ways when you eat the labor of your hands you shall be happy and it shall be well with you your wife shall be like a fruitful Vine in the very heart of your house your children like Olive plants all around your table behold thus shall the man be blessed who fears the Lord the Lord bless you out of Zion and may you see the good of Jerusalem all the days of your life yes may you see your children's children peace be upon Israel amen we please turn to Psalm 121 Psalm 121a as in Alpha we'll stand as we sing [Music] together for will your right Lord your keeper is your aome sh shall the Lord will keep you from all [Music] and well let us pray our great and Holy Father we thank you for this privilege to gather again in your house on your day with your people we ask that you would be glorified and and enthroned upon the Praises of your people here we bless you for for the sending of your son as the light of the world we thank you that he rescued those who were in darkness and we praise you for that blessed transition he has delivered us from the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of the son of his love we give glory and honor and praise to you most high and we thank you that you have assembled us together tonight and we ask that you would receive our worship as we come to the father through the Son and the spirit may God be glorified and and worshiped and praised in this glad hour we ask that your spirit would guide and direct us that you would promote in us that reverence and that that righteous fear of God before you as well Lord may we be may it be mingled with great joy and Thanksgiving and gratitude as we rehearse the several blessings that you have blessed us with namely every single one as the Apostle celebrates in Ephesians chapter 1 God we rejoice in justification and sanctification and that blessed glorification that awaits us we ask that you would forgive us for all of our sins tonight we know that we do not live as we ought we know that our conduct does fall short of that glorious gospel with which you've called us so we confess that remaining uh corruption even now praying for forgiveness in that precious blood of the Lamb we thank you that if we confess our sins you are faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness and we thank you for that early Creed where the confession was I believe in the Forgiveness of sins as well God we pray for any and all who've come here tonight dead in their trespasses and sins we pray that you would awaken them by your power that your word would come to them by the presence of the Holy Spirit and that you would bring them forth and move them out of Darkness into Marvelous Light we ask for your blessing upon this local body in terms of the temporal needs we know there are several amongst us that struggle on a regular basis with illness and with uh disease and we just commend them to you and to the word of your grace and pray that you would encourage them on a daily basis we pray that they would reflect often upon the scriptures that they would know that these uh momentary uh light afflictions would give way to an exceeding weight of glory and may this be a great encouragement unto them and God for all of us with the spiritual trials and The Temptations that we face in this present evil age we pray that we would know the fear of God we'd know the comfort and the presence of the holy spirit that we may walk in a manner that is glorifying to you help us and grant us Grace and grant us Aid to put on the Lord Jesus Christ and to make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts we pray for our children and for our young people we rejoice in your goodness we rejoice in your provision and God help us to take seriously the responsibility to bring them up in the training and the admonition of the Lord we pray for our sister Ashley that you would bless her and the little one in the womb and we look forward to the birth of this little one and pray God that you would just be glorified in this as well God we ask for your blessing upon the churches here in chilak we thank you that we're not alone in our community we pray for your great blessing upon the the the preaching of the truth we pray for change to come upon the hearts of many in this community that many would be called to the Lord Jesus Christ and they would believe on him as well God we pray for the various uh churches and situations that are going on in other parts of the world we know there is great turmoil and great trial and suffering for the persecuted bride of Christ we pray for your brothers our brothers and sisters there that they would persevere that they would be steadfast that they would know the joy of the Lord as their strength as well God we think of Myanmar and the ongoing battles and and bombings and the unrest that continues unabated there continue to surround that Orange Grove most high God continue to bless your people there and these orphans and refugees and strengthen and give wisdom to Peter and may it be the case that there would be a ceasefire in this land as well we pray for the unrest and the war in Ukraine and with Russia we pray for ceasefire and peace there and as well for the Middle East God we pray that there would be calm and there would be some sort of restoration of order and we ask God that your people that are that are affected by such situations would be protected by you as well our father we thank you for the missionary Enterprise we thank thank you that there are men who are preaching the gospel to the uttermost parts of the earth and we pray they'd know The Nearness of God as their good in this endeavor they have the promise of the ascended Christ who has promised that he will be with us even to the end of the age and may this indeed encourage them and may it strengthen them and may they go about their task with great joy and Thanksgiving now continue with us God as we worship and help us to glorify you and we pray through Jesus Christ Our Lord amen amen amen will you can turn with me again in your hym books to 405 hymn number 405 will stand as we sing [Music] together the [Music] of Church our bless Redeemer sing with his prous for here as the app of my heart and on my for her my tears shall fall for her my PR [Music] to my highest Mery commun all of love and PR Jesus our our saor and our King every and hope shall break my Tru shall be the brightest glor [Music] Bri you can turn in your Bibles to the book of Deuteronomy for our scripture reading we're in Deuteronomy chapter 14 Deuteronomy chapter 14 I'll read the entire chapter beginning in verse one you are the children of the Lord your God you shall not cut yourselves nor shave the front of your head for the dead for you are a holy people to the Lord your God and the Lord has chosen you to be a people for himself self a special treasure above all the peoples who are on the face of the Earth You shall not eat any detestable thing these are the animals which you may eat the ox the Sheep the goat the deer the gazelle the road deer the wild goat the mountain goat the analou and the mountain sheep and you may eat every animal with clo and Hooves having the hoof split into two parts and that choose the cud among the animals nevertheless of those that chew the Cod or have clo and Hooves you shall not eat such as these the camel the hair and the rock hxs for they chew the Cod but do not have cloven Hooves they are unclean for you also the swine is unclean for you because it has clov and Hooves yet does not chew the cud you shall not eat their flesh or touch their dead carcasses these you may eat of all that are in the waters you may eat all that have fins and scales and what whatever does not have fins and scales you shall not eat it is unclean for you all clean Birds you may eat but these you shall not eat the eagle the vulture the Buzzard the red kite the Falcon and the kite after their kinds every Raven after its kind the ostrich the short eared owl the seagull and the hawk after their kinds The Little Owl the screech owl the white owl the jackdaw the caran vulture the Fisher owl the store the Heron after its kind and the hoop and the bat also every creeping thing that flies is unclean for you they shall not be eaten you may eat all clean Birds you shall not eat anything that dies of itself you may give it to the alien who is within your Gates that he may eat it or you may sell it to a foreigner for you are a holy people to the Lord your God you shall not boil a young goat in its mother's milk you shall truly tithe all the increase of your G grain and the field produces year and uh excuse me the grain that the field produces Year bye and you shall eat before the Lord your God in the place where he chooses to make his name abide the tithe of your grain and your new wine and your oil of the firstborn of your herds and your flocks that you may learn to fear the lord your God always but if the journey is too long for you so that you are not able to carry the tithe or if the place where the Lord your God chooses to put his name is too far from you when the Lord your God has blessed you then you shall exchange it for money take the money in your hand and go to the place which the Lord your God chooses and you shall spend your EXC excuse me you shall spend that money for whatever your heart desires for oxen or sheep for wine or similar drink for whatever your heart desires you shall eat there before the Lord your God and you shall rejoice you and your your household you shall not forsake the levite who is within your gates for he has no part nor inheritance with you at the end of every third year you shall bring out the tithe of your produce of that year and store it up within your Gates and the levite because he has no portion nor inheritance with you and the stranger and the fatherless and the Widow who are within your Gates may come and eat and be satisfied that the Lord your God May bless you in all the work of your hand which you do amen the primary emphasis here is on what we call ceremonial law there's a three-fold division of the law you see that uh in scripture specifically in the book of Exodus you have the moral law that is the trans covenantal revelation of who God is that is unchanging dep uh doesn't depend on what Covenant you're in doesn't depend on what country you're in the moral law abides perpetually upon all of God's creatures and then there is ceremonial law which were those things distinct to the body of Israel and it regulated their worship practices prefigured and typified the coming of the Lord Jesus Christ and then there was judicial law for that body as a political entity on how to govern in the land that the Lord God was giving them with reference to the ceremonial law if you notice specifically here in chapter 14 I think it's governed these particular rules respecting eating and and what one wore in terms of old Covenant Israel I think verse two is the rationale for that says for you are a holy people to the Lord your God and the Lord has chosen you to be a people for himself a special treasure above all the peoples who are on the face of the Earth they were supposed to be distinct from and to be different from the Heathen that surrounded the nation of Israel so whether it be diet whether it be clothing whether it be worship whatever it was they were to be mindful of the fact that they were a separate people holy unto their God now in the New Covenant this sort of of language is applied to the church it is the church that does receive the promises of God in and through our Lord Jesus Christ he is the true Israel of God and we are blessed in him and as far as that is concerned these ceremonial laws that pointed forward to him We're fulfilled by him and no longer are binding upon the Christian church so we are not governed by these things relative to diet relative to what we wear but there are those guiding principles that we ought to be a separate people from the Heathen around us we ought to pursue Holiness without which no one will see the Lord perfecting Holiness in the fear of God as Paul says in 2 Corinthians 71 and then with reference to the tithing and to the sacrifices you see that this was in part to sustain and support the priesthood the Levites did not receive inherited land they did not have their own Parcels of land they did not have their own allotment so they couldn't grow and uh uh vegetables and they couldn't grow or herd uh uh animals and herds and whatnot and so they lived or they were sustained by these offerings that were given to God this was built in and stipulated in the law of the sacrifices and in the law of the priesthood well let us pray our great God and Father we thank you for your word we thank you that every jot and tit is given by inspiration of God and that it's profitable for Doctrine for reproof for correction and for instruction in righteousness and I pray that you would help each of us to be governed by that word and help us to have ears to hear and hearts to receive your word and may we by your grace and the power and the presence of the Holy Spirit put these things into practice what we find uh uh abinding on us in this new covenant era and we ask through Jesus Christ Our Lord amen will you can turn with me again in your hym books to 457 457 and we'll stand as we sing and rightousness my beauty are my glorious World in Great Joy shall my head shall I stand in my great for to my holy as all I am from s and fear from and shame the I Rise to my [Music] Jesus Jus toless Mery for me for me and [Music] Ting let the my voice [Applause] my glor [Music] Jesus well you can turn with me in your Bibles to the book of Ephesians we're in Ephesians chapter 5 Ephesians chapter 5 working our way through what has been called the household code those sections of the Epistles where there's specific directions given to the people of God as the people of God in their various walks of life I'll just pick up reading in Ephesians 5 at verse 15 see then that you walk circumspectly not as fools but as wise Redeeming the time because the days are evil therefore do not be unwise but understand what the will of the Lord is and do not be drunk with wine in which is dissipation but be filled with the spirit speaking to one another in Psalms and hymns and spiritual songs singing and making melody in your heart uh to the Lord giving thanks always for all things to God the father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ submitting to one another in the fear of God wives submit to your own husbands as to the Lord for the husband is head of the wife as also Christ is head of the church and he is the savior of the body therefore just as the church is is subject to Christ so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of Water by the word that he might present her to himself a glorious church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that she should be holy and without blemish so husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies he who loves his wife loves himself for no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it just as the Lord does the church for we are members of his body of his flesh and of his bones for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh this is a great mystery but I speak concerning Christ in the church nevertheless Let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband amen well let us pray Our Father in Heaven thank you for your word and thank you that does detail or give us detailed instructions concerning our relationships here in this present evil age and we know that apart from your Holy Spirit We cannot put these things into practice so we pray that you would Supply him first that we might receive the teaching of your Holy Scripture and second that we might put these things into practice both husbands and wives in their relationships we pray that we would glorify you in the home that we would glorify you in the church that we would glorify you in society and and and as individuals that we would take seriously our blessed privilege to walk according to that Gospel of our Salvation again forgive us now for all of our sin and unrighteousness and we pray through Jesus Christ Our Lord amen well in Ephesians chapters 1 and 2 we have the doctrinal foundation Paul expounds on the gospel of our salvation and then in chapter 3 there's a bit of a transition he indicates his place in Redemptive history as the Apostle to the Gentiles and underscores that mystery which is Gentile inclusion in the Covenant Promises of God made to Israel fulfilled of course in our Lord Jesus Christ and then from 41 all the way through chapter 6 we have practical application we're supposed to walk in a manner that is consistent with our High Calling that's the general sort of exhortation in chapter 4 at verse one we are we are prohibited according to chapter 4 and verse 17 as walking like the Gentiles in the futility of their mind and then he gets real specific in terms of that walk in chapter 5 in verse one he says we're supposed to walk in love in verse eight he says we're supposed to walk in in light and then here in F uh 5:15 he says we're to walk in wisdom so he gives this emphasis on walking circumspectly being wise not fools and then he gives a particular command to be filled with the Holy Holy Spirit and then he indicates what it looks like to uh be filled with the Holy Spirit it will be reflected in the way that we sing We Sing Psalms hymns and spiritual songs we we praise God we pray to God and we Proclaim his truth to those we are singing with and then he says that we will be singing and making melody in our hearts to the Lord and then he says we will be giving all uh uh giving thanks to God for all things through our Lord Jesus Christ and then in verse 21 he says submitting to one another in the fear of God so that's the general sort of a statement and then from 522 all the way to 69 he gives specific concrete application he deals with the wife husband relationship the child parent relationship and then the servant Master relationship and so this as I said is a household code how the people of God are supposed to live having been bought by the Precious Blood of our Lord Jesus and being filled with the spirit so we've already looked at verses 22 to 24 the exhortation to wives tonight we'll look at the exhortation to husbands specifically verses 25 to 27 God willing we'll finish the section next Sunday night but tonight the exhortation to husbands and we'll look at first of all the exhortation to lead with love in verse 25A and then secondly the demonstration of leading with love in verses 25b to 27 in other words he calls us to a particular meth uh manner of life and then he gives us as the standard or as the pattern for that our Lord Jesus Christ so let's look first of all at the exhortation to lead with love it's very simple we've got a duty stated and then the duty explained notice in 25A husbands love your wives now with reference to the duty stated there's probably a an assumption on our part probably not on our part because we've read this passage or we've heard this passage preach but for that original audience after telling the wives in verse 22 submit to your own husbands as to the Lord we might expect in verse 25 husbands rule your wives husbands lead your wives husbands govern your wives but that's not Paul's statement here Paul says husbands love your wives he's already stated that the husband is the head of the wife notice in 23 or 22 wives submit to your own husbands as to the Lord and then the rationale or Reason is for the husband is head of the wife so he's already stipulated this he's already indicated this he's already stated this he's not arguing arguing that the husband should lead he's not arguing that the husband should govern he's not arguing that the husband should rule he's assuming it because he's already stated it for the husband is the head of the wife the Apostle has used the analogy of Jesus as the head of the church in verse 23b and again that's the standard or the pattern that the husband is to imitate or to sort uh uh try and follow the Apostle does not exhort the man to lead God made man to lead that's a given that's an indicative it's not an imperative Paul's concern is that the man leads in a particular way so Paul is concerned with the how he exercises this headship how he exercises this government how he exercises this leadership as John Edy said husbands are not to be domestic tyrants but their Dominion is to be a reign of Love they're not to be domestic tyrants but theirs is to be a reign of love so we've got this statement wife submit to your own husbands as to the Lord the reason is because the husband is the head of the wife what could possibly happen with a sinful man when he hears that well if I'm the head I'm the leader I'm the governor then I'm going to exercise tyranny I'm going to be a desperate I'm I'm going to forget all about love I'm going to forget all about compassion I'm going to forget all about the kindness and the the gentleness and the meekness of my Lord Jesus and I'm just going to let her have it I'm just going to make her submit that's not what it's supposed to be if that's your conception of male headship or wiely submission you're not biblically minded you're not thinking properly again Ed says husbands are not to be domestic tyrants but their Dominion is to be a reign of love if you don't get anything else other than that tonight get that because that's Paul's concern in Ephesians 5:25 husbands love your wives now in terms of the explanation of the duty I have two things here first the nature of the command and secondly the explanation of the command La uh the fact that this exhortation is repeated notice again in verse 28 and then in verse 33 signifies its importance in fact if you look at this section 22-33 it's about the wife husband relationship but the wife gets very little in terms of verse count it's the man that Paul deals with not that he doesn't deal with the wife but the emphasis is upon that the emphasis is upon his Reign and it's supposed to be a reign of love and I would suggest in terms of the nature of the command Paul speaks realistically Paul speaks realistically inherent in a woman is to love her husband so what does Paul address in this particular passage that love must be tempered by submission and respect to her man the man inherently is going to rule inherently he is going to lead now I realize there's beta males I realize there's passive men I realize there's low te guys I realize there's those sorts of fellows that want to abdicate and give the the the Reigns to their to their wife and just about everything but that's that's the exception the general rule is is that God made man to lead and men with testosterone typically do lead they either lead well or they lead poorly Paul's concern is that they lead well that they lead by love lead with love so Paul speaks realistically so the husband inherently rules he must temper that with love she is not his property she is not Shadle she's not like a cow she's not like a John Deere tractor she is not like a piece of a possession that one owns she is your wife and therefore you are to love her he speaks realistically FF Bruce made the observation that a husband's legal authority over his wife was such that she had little hope of redress at law for Harsh or unfeeling conduct on his part in fact several of the commentators point that out the Jews never were really commanded to love their wives and in this particular context Brethren I don't know that I brought it out last time but the typical marrying age of a girl in the Roman Empire at this date was about 12 average was about 14 and she was usually marrying a man a decade or two decades older than her so it would be quite common for a man 10 or 15 or 20 years older than a girl to use her as a slave or Reign Over her with uh tyranny or to not engage in that loving sort of a relationship see Paul in this this Roman Empire world is revolutionary George Bernard Shaw the famous novelist said that the Apostle Paul was the Eternal enemy of women nothing could be further from the truth Paul was the champion for dare I said women's rights he wanted the wife to be protected he wanted the wife to be cared for he wanted the wife to be loved he wanted the wife to be treated the way that Christ treats his bride Paul was not the enemy of women Paul was not a chauvinist Paul was a protector actor under the Holy Spirit governing the men in this in the churches on how they were supposed to operate in this orbit of marriage so back to FF Bruce a husband's legal legal authority over his wife was such that she had little hope of redress at law for Harsh or unfeeling conduct on his part but such a sh situation should not arise in a Christian household the forbearance and forgiveness which are enjoyed in the pre preceding section of the letter Remember by the time we get to Ephesians 5 2 husbands love your wives we've learned a lot about love we've learned a lot about how to conduct ourselves toward one another in the context of the local church if I'm supposed to relate lovingly and forbearing and forgivingly toward my brother or sister in the Pew next to me I'm certainly supposed to have that mindset with the bride who shares my bed with the bride who shares my living room and my kitchen I'm supposed to have that orientation and that's Paul's concern here he says uh uh the forbearance and forgiveness which are enjoying in the preceding section of the letter together with compassion kindness humility gentleness and patience forbid a Christian man to be harsh in his treatment of anyone especially of his own wife so I I submit that Paul speaks realistically secondly Paul speaks consistently what's he going to do from verses 28-33 he is going to apply the one flesh analogy where do you think he fetches that one flesh analogy he fetches it from the Garden of Eden he fetches it from the creation account this is not new teaching by Paul this is not revolutionary this is God's mind revealed in both the Old and the New Testaments Matthew Henry made the comment concerning the creation of the woman he said the woman is not made out of his head to top him nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him but out of his side to be equal with him under his arm to be protected and near his heart to be beloved maredith Klein made the observation the woman was made for the man yet not as his slave girl but as his Queen see that's Paul's orientation it's not brand new it's revolutionary in terms of the Roman Empire it's revolutionary probably in terms of Jewish practice but it's not revolutionary in the mind of God God saw that the man was alone there was not one comparable to him there was not a help meet for Adam that was the one time during the creation week that God said something wasn't good and so what does God do he fixes the problem he removes the rib he fashion the woman he brings her to Adam such that they are now one flesh so Paul speaks consistently I would suggest thirdly under the nature of the command that the Apostle speaks particular particularly notice again in verse 25 husbands love your wives not everybody else's wife not all the wives out there to be loved just like when he says to the wife submit to your own husbands Paul's not a Muslim he's not telling you ladies that you need to be submissive to every single man on the face of the Earth no he's particular he's a Christian he is consistent with God's mind revealed in scripture relative to the created order wives submit to your own husbands husbands love your wives that doesn't mean you hate your sisters it doesn't mean you have no kindness for your sisters but it means that you love one above all the others and you love one in a manner that's different than the love that you have for all the others and then I would suggest finally under under the nature of the command that the Apostle speaks authoritatively the Apostle speaks authoritatively in other words this isn't open for negotiation this isn't open for for argument unless she's not really that lovely we'll we'll deal with that as we move through the text neither is the church but Christ loved her and he gave himself for her and under his rule under his government under his tutelage she actually gets more beautiful she gets more radiant she achieves that place of without blemish in that Eternal state so Paul says that under your rule under your government under your Authority your wife should be bettered your wife should be helped your wife should be blessed that's what it means to love her it means to bring blessing to her and upon her so that's the nature of the command but the ex explanation of the command in other words what does that mean love your wives you know we have this conception of what love is and it's really wrong it's really wonky you know love is defined by Hollywood or love is you know the the the just the erotic sort of ense no love in the Bible is you know objective obedience to God's commands so there's a general sense where 1 Corinthians 13 advises us on this aspect of love you can turn there 1 Corinthians chapter 13 the argument here under the explanation of the command is the definition of love in a general sense and if General then certainly specific husband to wife if this is to be the overarching sort of mindset or ethic or practice of the people of God in general certainly we ought not to withhold that from our wives in the context of marital Union notice in 1 Corinthians chapter 13 at verse 4 love suffers long and is kind Brethren short fuses have no place in marriage right I can't believe you better you know Buckle in for the long hall because it's not always going to be as beautiful and as wonderful as you think it might be I know that that when you're in the honeymoon phase I know precursor to the honeymoon you think that there's no blemish whatsoever in that potential mate there is and it's going to be evident it's going to be evident in Spades so so much so that you're going to have to invoke God's help to suffer long patience is what it means but that's a great sort of a way to describe patience suffering long right and I'm not saying this as if I've got problems I'm saying this is I know that my wife's got problems having to suffer long with me but notice love suffers long believe it or not bre I'm really weird I got my issues it cannot be you know a walk in the park for that dear woman love suffers long and is kind kind we need to be kind to our Brides kind to our wives kind to our spouses not rough not edgy the way that you talk with the fellas at work you need to be kind love does not envy that means it doesn't want to deprive somebody of something good jealousy I just want what you have Envy I want what you have and I don't want you to have it there shouldn't be that in a marriage we should love without Envy love does not parade itself it is not puffed up it does not behave rudely it does not seek its own it is not provoked it thinks no evil it does not rejoice in iniquity but it rejoices in the truth it Bears all things it believes all things it hope all hopes all things it endures all things Love Never Fails so as I said before I'll say it again if General in terms of Christians orientation then certainly specific relative to the husband wife relationship but then with reference to the characteristics of love in the marriage Union taking into consideration the example of Christ this is one of those passages where Christ is held up as a standard or as an example example again that's not all He Is We preach Christ in him crucified to the Jews a stumbling block and to the Greeks foolishness but to those who are being saved Christ the wisdom and power of God there is that sense where he is an example for the husband relative to the love that he's supposed to express to his wife the same love that Christ expresses to his bride so when we consider and Ponder what it says here concerning Jesus and elsewhere in the Bible with reference to the characteristics of love and the marriage Union I would suggest first the husband is Faithfully monogamous he is Faithfully monogamous he's a onew woman man several woman man he's not got roving eyes he's not one of those fellows that you know can't wait to get away from his wife to go chasing after somebody else turn to the prophet Ezekiel there's an interesting passage in Ezekiel uh uh chapter 24 Ezekiel chapter 24 on the heels I'm sorry it's not Ezekiel chapter 24 it must be chapter yes it is chapter 24 sorry basically what we find is that God wants Israel to respond to the destruction of their Temple and their city in a way that is consistent with God's instruction and so the way that he wants them to do that is the way that he wants Ezekiel to deal with a tragedy in his own life notice in Ezekiel 24:1 15 also the word of the Lord came to me saying son of man behold I take away from you the desire of your W of your eyes with one stroke yet you shall neither mourn nor weep nor shall your tears run down sigh in silence make no mourning for the dead bind your turban on your head and put your sandals on your feet do not cover your lips and do not eat man's bread of Sorrow so I spoke to the people in the morning and at evening my wife died and the next morning I did as I was commanded again the spiritual lesson for Israel is that you're going to be decimated you're going to be devastated you're going to be destroyed why because you broke Covenant you broke Covenant Deuteronomy 28 specified that when you broke Covenant you would be judged severely so you would be decimated you would be exiled you'd be cast out of the land the land would vomit you out of its mouth that's the lesson they're not supposed to whine about it they're not supposed to Grumble about it they're not supposed to ache and moan about it they're supposed to take it in stride because they're responsible for this eventuality but notice the desire of your eyes it is his wife not every wife in Israel but the one wife that he's married to the husband loves his wife by maintaining faithful monogamy he's a one-woman man secondly the husband is consistently self-sacrificing that's the onus that's the emphasis in 25b to 27 just as Christ loved the church and did what he gave himself for her back to Ed's statement husbands are not to be domestic tyrants but their Dominion is to be a reign of Love genuine headship in the Christian home is not the man sitting in his Big Easy chair pounding the side of it telling his wife what to do that's not what we're finding in this particular passage he is consistently self-sacrificing and I would suggest under the characteristics of love and the marriage Union the husband is joyfully committed to her well-being he is joyfully committed to her well-being and all of these modifiers were placed in there specifically we can't just do it we must do it happily well I got to love you baby that's just the way it goes I mean man it's a real bummer it's a real chore it's a real burden now we may not vocalize that but sometimes we don't have to sometimes it's written all over us that yeah I'll do it but I'm not really happy about it I I I don't I don't want don't look surprised Brethren youall have children you've seen this before tell your child to do okay yeah I'm going to do it that's not sweet submission dare I say I can't be the only man in the room maybe I am maybe I'm outing myself maybe this says a lot more about me than it does any of you but you got to have the right disposition too there's got to be this joyful pursuit of her wellbe notice the language when he does invoke this one flesh argument look at verse 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh but he does what with it he nourishes it and he cherishes it just as the Lord does the church well the only way to nourish and cherish something is with diligence obviously but there's a joyful purpose there's a a desirable end you you do this because it's good you do this because you give you do this because you want her well-being and then I would suggest the expression of love in the marriage Union three p's here I made this ill iterable so that you can remember this three p's pray for her provide for her and protect her pray for her provide for her and protect her now nothing's ever that simple so I'm going to investigate this a little bit more deeply first of all he prays for her notice again the example of Jesus in verse 26 that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of Water by the word so under pray for her I mean religious spiritual government religious spiritual leadership religious spiritual rule in other words you encourage Church participation you encourage Bible reading you encourage prayer you encourage singing you do this with her and together you pray for her you're concerned about her spiritual State she says honey I was reading heresy on the internet today oh that's good babe I I I hope you come out as an Aryan no you you don't do that you you try to prevent that you you try to speak peace and love peace uh speak love to her in a in a way that promotes peace in in the home so the husband prays for his wife he cares for her there's spiritual tutelage going on not master to Servant not you know wondrous teacher to lowly one that's not what I mean but I mean that the husband takes charge in the home and he governs with reference to religion and spirituality secondly the husband provides for his wife there's two things here the law of God and the instruction by Paul the law of God in Exodus CH 21 specifically at verse 10 indicates that if a man took a wife an additional wife to the one he already had it's in the context of slavery he could take this woman that was a slave and either marry her or give her to his son but in either case if he took her as his wife or if the son took her as his wife there was still an obligation to wife number one in other words just because he found another wife doesn't mean he forgets wife number one so again polygamy was never God's intention he made man he made woman he made one man he made one woman but because of sin polygamy obtained because of sin men added wives so what does God do he provides redress in the law to protect the innocent parties and he does that so with reference to Exodus 21 there's three specifics if he took a wife number two he could not diminish wife number one's Pantry closets or bed he could not diminish her right to food to clothing and to marital intimacy that's what Exodus 2110 says in terms of marital intimacy 1 Corinthians chapter 7: 3 to 5 gives that reciprocal obligation on the part of husbands and wives and in that instance it says the wife has the authority over the man's body when it comes to marital intimacy the conjugal relation so the Apostle Paul uh then comes along in 1 Timothy Chapter 5 and he gives that admonition if a man does not provide for his own what is he well he's a common 21st century deadbeat that doesn't serve his spouse yeah he's an Infidel he's an unbeliever he's a bad guy the guy that reneges on his responsibility to keep his wife's Pantry filled to keep her co uh closet filled and to keep her sexually fulfilled is a deadbe according to the Apostle Paul he's worse than an Infidel he's worse than an unbeliever so you pray pray for her you provide for her and then thirdly you protect her there's a couple of passages that speak to this again the law of God Exodus chapter 22 now Heber the kenite had a sturdy wife by the name of Ja and she was quite handy wielding a tent Peg even so it was his responsibility if somebody broke into the house to go and rebuff them to go and stop them well you're under the covers you don't nudge your wife out of the out of the bed honey go downstairs and see what's going on you know take the knife take the stick what whatever just just go figure it out no you have an obligation to provide for uh to protect her the Apostle uh Paul makes this very clear in our passage as well this whole idea of love and then a comparison with the Lord Jesus Christ Westminster Shorter Catechism picks up on this it says how does Christ execute the office of a king Christ executes the office of a king in subduing us to himself in ruling and what defending us and in restraining and conquering all his and our enemies so we need to reckon with something our culture absolutely despises our culture hates this our culture thinks this is bad our culture thinks that a man with a beard ought to be able to compete in women's sports and win that's how messed up we are they actually stop calling women women and they call them birthing persons or whatever the nonsense of the day might particularly be listen to Peter and 1 Peter chapter 3 this is not denigrating ladies don't get you know offended if you're offended by Peter's statement you're Mar more connected and attached to this culture than you might might imagine listen to what he says husbands likewise dwell with them with understanding giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel I'm not the weaker vessel yeah you are sorry again if you don't like that if you recoil in horror against that you've probably got more sympathies with the present culture than you do with the biblical worldview the Apostle Peter acknowledges what everybody up until the 21st century acknowledged that men are stronger physically emotionally uh not always spiritually some women give you a run for the money there but in a general sense Brethren so who's supposed to go downstairs jail with the tent Peg or you with the tent Peg it's supposed to be you you're supposed to Defender her you're supposed to protect her that in the context of love now I would suggest that when he invokes the uh example of the Lord Jesus Christ that Supreme demonstration of self-sacrifice he gave himself for her what should we extrapolate from that we should be willing to die for our Brides I don't think any of us would disagree with that in principle we would all say ah there's a guy who robs us on the street he's got a gun he points it in the face of my wife I'm going to try to get betwix him and the go uh uh her and the gun that's Noble that's good but let us not forget we need to live for her each and every day as well in the parallel passage in Colossians chapter 3 the Apostle says husbands love your wives and do not be bitter toward them if you're willing to eat a bullet for her you ought to be willing to bury your bitterness because she burned inner or bury bitterness because she didn't make everything perfect for you this is the orbit of love this is what it means this is the self-sacrifice advice that the Apostle calls us to and that's the section we move on to well before we do let me just read John Gil he summarizes it beautifully husbands love your wives he says which consists in a strong and cordial affection for them in a real delight and pleasure in them in showing respect it's interesting because if you've seen the picture of John Gil it doesn't sound like this comes from him looks like the brother could have used some metam musil or something he looks all stopped up he looks unhappy but he sounds like a happy brother when it comes to contemplating his beloved in showing respect and doing honor to them in seeking their contentment satisfaction and pleasure in a quiet constant and comfortable dwelling with them in providing all things necessary for them in protecting them from all injuries and abuses in concealing their faults and covering their infirmities in entertaining the best opinion of their persons and actions and endeavoring and in endeavoring to promote their spiritual good and Welfare this love ought to be Hardy and sincere and not feigned and selfish it should be shown in private as well well as in public it should be chased and single constant and Perpetual it should exceed that which is Bor to neighbors or even to parents and should be equal to that a man Bears to himself though uh not so as to hinder and break in upon love to God in Christ what he's saying your love for your bride ought to far surpass every relationship except God right doesn't mean you hate your kids it means you love your bride you love your queen you take good care of her you pray for her you provide for her and you protect her that's what Gil is saying is what love is all about now notice secondly the demonstration of leading with love verses 25b to 27 we have here first the pattern of our Lord Jesus in 25b and then second the pl uh plan of our Lord Jesus in verses 26 and 27 note with reference to the pattern there is this declaration of his love right we know that he speaks verbally the the the Bible is not silent when it comes to God so loving the world there's that verbal acknowledgement there is that that that communication by the the written and spoken word that God loves us notice that Jesus function functions here as the standard with reference to the husband's love for his wife this isn't new look back at 52 51 it says therefore be imitators of God as dear children and walk in love as Christ at was 52 I said 51 just like I said Philip this morning it was Thomas in John 14 that asked to see the father so here it's walk in love as Christ also loved us and has uh given himself for us so this is not new the standard is Christ so husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church now this is an analogy and all analogies break down at some point okay we can't push this too far we don't have the power to redeem our wives we don't have the power to sanctify our wives we don't have the power to to convey upon them a free justification or sanctification so the analogy is good and we need to model ourselves after it we need to realize the limitations so so when we come to this particular passage we see the relevance of the analogy as well husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church because again you're going to have somebody sitting in the congregation the Apostle Paul sends the letter the Apostle Paul reads the letter and he says husbands love your wives what's going to immediately suggest itself to some you know Meathead in the congregation but she's not that lovely she's just not she's just not I would always want to say well why did you marry her I if you couldn't love her you shouldn't have married her remember the emphasis last time do some work on the front end so you don't end up in divorce on the back end do a little bit of contemplation and meditation on Ephesians chapter 5 before you say I do before you Covenant together before God and men do your work do your due diligence if you were bu buying a car you'd certainly want a mechanic to investigate it I'm not suggesting you get a mechanic to kick the tires on this potential bride but you do your work you make sure that you can love this particular person right this seems obvious so if somebody says well you know Paul husbands love your wives I get it in principle but she's just not that lovely listen to step B he says Christ's model demonstrates a love toward someone who is not perfect or purely lovable in the case of the church remember this Brethren you and I are the church okay when the church is referred to there's present blessing to be sure there is a not yet consummated glory to be sure but there's a lot of mess a lot of wrinkles a lot of spots he says in the case of the church she is full of warts wrinkles and impurities outside Christ's loving Consecration and cleansing so there is this declaration of his love love your wives just as Christ also loved the church but then notice there is this demonstration of his love so the Declaration is the verbal acknowledgement that he loves her but the demonstration is that he gave himself for her that's the end of verse 25 so the Apostle now is engaged in a bit of a digression he doesn't immediately return to the responsibility of husbands or wives he takes up his favorite subject it's Jesus and by the way according to verse 32 the whole section or unit is about Jesus now there's incidental teaching about husbands and wives to be sure and we need to glean that and gain that and Garner that but the whole emphasis here is upon Christ and his bride so the Apostle Paul first declares Christ's love for his church but then he demonstrates Christ's love for the church and the analogy in the hand of the Apostle indicates that the love of Christ for us is selfs sacrifice say he gave himself for her he doesn't uh uh demand everything he doesn't sit in his easy chair banging the side telling telling him to to do this and to do that his is in fact A Reign of love and as well his love for her is not only self-sacrificing but it's Redemptive again the analogy breaks down we can't redeem our Brides but we can certainly encourage them we can certainly press upon them the need to read scripture and and go to church and and and pray and all those sorts of things but with reference to our lord Jesus he better our state doesn't he that's what Redemption is all about Jesus Christ elevates us under his leadership under his government under his rule we become something better what's the point is your wife becoming something better under your rule under your government under your leadership if not brother it's probably not her fault I mean it is cu she may be a deadbeat too but you've got to Bear some of that responsibility look at Paul uh Peter again in 1 Peter chapter 3 you ever struggle with prayer not the act of but feeling as if it never got out of the the the the room it never ever got to the very ear of God look at again first Peter 3 I stopped the reading of the text just to highlight the weaker vessel but notice what Peter goes on to say husbands likewise dwell with them with understanding giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel and as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers may not be hindered huh you mean the way that I mistreat my wife may actually bar up blessing from God uh yeah yeah that's exactly what it says the way that you mistreat your wife may actually bar up the blessing of God see the Lord Lord Jesus Christ under his government the church is bettered the church is redeemed he self-sacrifices for her increase the same ought to obtain in the married relationship back to our text so that's the pattern of our Lord Jesus in verse 25b but then notice the plan of our Lord Jesus in verses 26 and 27 Paul uses a lot of Old Testament stuff here going to just try to unpack it a little bit we're going to bring this home very soon we're not going to be much longer but look at what Paul does here so he says generally just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her so there's definite atonement blood atonement particular Redemption Paul's christology is impeccable he's not you know telling us that Jesus died for every man without exception he died for the church he purchased his bride he went after the elect those are his those are the ones but then notice the perp particular plan the sanctification of his bride verse 26 the presentation of his bride verse 27A and then ultimately the consumate Holiness of his bride in verse 27b but note first the sanctification of his bride that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of Water by the word again lots of metaphors lots of things to unpack there but I think if we just adopt the mindset that Paul's already spoken in terms of old Covenant cult it helps us to navigate this passage because some Wonder well did he cleanse her with the washing of water is that baptism wasn't it cleansing by the washing through his own precious blood you know there's all these background statements in in Ezekiel 16 G uh the Lord God Yahweh comes to Israel she's in her blood he says live live he decks her with ornaments he takes her as his own certainly an obvious sort of a connection to this particular passage but uh Ezekiel 36 the the the god of Heaven and Earth says it'll sprinkle clean water upon them and cleanse them I think back even further see the idea of ceremonial washing it's the idea of preparation to go into the house of God again this concept is already present notice in Ephesians 2 Ephesians 2:8 for through him we both have access by one Spirit to the father verse 19 now therefore you are no longer strangers and foreigners but fellow citizens with the Saints and members of the household of God having been built on the foundation of the Apostles and Prophets Jesus Christ himself being the Chief Cornerstone in whom the whole building being fitted together grow goes into a holy Temple in the Lord in whom you also are being built together for a Dwelling Place of God in the spirit how did you enter into the temple you had to First be cleansed you had to go through water rights you had to be purified something had to obtain before you could enter into the very presence of God this sort of Temple mindset or Motif is present notice in chapter 3 at verse 19 to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge that you may may be filled with all the fullness of God I remember preaching that vividly there's two particular ways one can look at it I favored the shikina glory of God coming upon the temple and that blazing glory manifested in their midst so going back to this particular section instead of trying to you know figure out every jot and tit of it just understand that what Christ does is he prepares his bride for communion with the father he prepares his bride for entrance in to the very presence of God Almighty he sanctifies her he cleanses her with the washing of Water by the word the Geneva Bible glosses this way through the promise of free justification and sanctification in Christ received by faith Gil says being justified by his righteousness washed in his blood and Sanctified by his spirit so a general statement in verse 26 that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of Water by the word again it's about Christ but there's certain parallel and and the analogy obtains with reference to the man you can't do this you can't affect this you're not the powerful Holy Spirit but you again can encourage it you can pray for her you can make sure that she can access those means that are sufficient to benefit her soul and then notice secondly the presentation of his bride that he might present her to himself a glorious Church Paul says something like this in 2 Corinthians 11:2 highlighting his own instrumentality with the church at Corinth he says for I am jealous for you with a Godly jealousy for I have betrothed you to one husband that I may present you as a chased virgin to Christ Paul saw his Apostolic Ministry in those terms and he's upgrading the Corinthian Church because they were the Corinthian Church they had a multitude of problems they had a multitude of issues they had a multitude of failures and yet he says I am jealous for for you with Godly jealousy for I have betrothed you to one husband that I may present you as a chased virgin to Christ but obviously the effective agent the emphasis falls upon the Lord Jesus and you see that here in verse 27 that he might present her to himself a glorious church and don't miss that two little two little words to himself he saves us for himself isn't that beautiful tiberg catechism number one what is your only hope in this life or only comfort in life and death that I am not my own but belong body and soul in life and death to my faithful Savior Jesus Christ he he does this to present her to himself and there's an already aspect of this and a not yet the already is Hebrews 10: 19 to 25 we have been cleansed in his Precious Blood and as the church gathered we have access in into the presence of God most high but there's a not yet consumate Glory aspect that awaits us Revelation 19 7 to1 Revelation 21: 2 Revelation 21: 9 to 11 we've already received great blessing from our Lord we've already been Justified freely by his grace through his blood we've already been Sanctified or being Sanctified but we're not at that State of all of not yet now and that's where he finishes his argument in verse 27b that he might present her to himself a glorious church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that she should be holy and without blemish now the Apostle uses this metaphor this language because it does suggest a blemish right wrinkles you notice this as you get older uh spots you notice that as you get older and and all kinds of other things but what is the apostles mindset here for those of us who were gathered on Wednesday night it's Leviticus it's Leviticus remember the idea is is that you need to be cleaned up before you enter into the house of God right you need to be washed with water cleansed ceremonially prepared to meet the bridegroom well in The Book of Leviticus there were certain foods that you were not supposed to eat there were blemished animals that you were not supposed to sacrifice and there was a class of priests that if they had certain physical anomalies they were not allowed to engage in service at the altar they weren't condemned for being a hunchback they weren't condemned for being a dwarf they weren't condemned for having a gimped hand or a foot but they were prevented from offering at this at the altar and we think that sounds a bit unkind a bit unfair no the god of absolute Glory majesty and Holiness who is altogether wondrous demands that the animals used for sacrifice are blemish free and he demands that the man who offers the animals as far as is able be blemish free in other words in the entirety of the Covenant Community in Israel pick the fellows that don't have these blemishes to serve at the altar now God doesn't say they can't eat from the altar because they were priests they were entitled as I said earlier they didn't have allotments they didn't have Tribal allotments they didn't have places to grow food they didn't have places to raise animals so what does God say through Moses to the people of Israel they're free to eat they're not unclean they're not impure they've just got a blemish that keeps them from Pres presenting sacrifice in the presence of God most high I submit that that's what Paul is on about there's no spot there's no wrinkle there's no blemish there was nothing that would bar communion with the Triune God of absolute glory and Holiness this under Christ's rulership this under Christ's headship this under Christ's leadership this under Christ government he sanctifies her he cleanses her he washes her he does it instrument through the word of the gospel and he does so that he can present her to himself a glorious Church such that on that day she'll have no spot she'll have no wrinkle and she will be blemish free when she stands in the presence of God most high to worship World Without End Amen talk about a standard for our love for our Brides brethren we better get at it because we got lots of work to do to try and imitate what our bless blessed savior does in terms of cleaning this mess up and making it presentable to his father in Heaven we are moving we are on our path we are going we are in sanctification we are being washed we are being Sanctified we are being cleansed we are being presented to him as a glorious church but it's not been yet fully realized what we're going to become without spot without wrinkle and without blemish the Apostle Paul underscores the blessedness of our Lord Jesus Christ who not only justifies us not only sanctifies us but is purposed and planned to glorify us and he does this for himself in conclusion we need to understand the responsibility of the husband the necessity to lead his wife in the context of love the standard of leading his wife in the context of Love is the Lord Jesus Christ the explanation of of what it means to lead his wife in the context of love and again you saw where I got that I didn't just come up with pray for her and provide for her and protect her John Gil says exactly the same thing so does John Calvin John Edy Charles Hodge just about every commentator who takes pen to paper and comments on what it means to love like Christ loved the church and the encouragement Brethren from me to you and hopefully you to me that we do this for God's glory and for our wives well-being secondly the relationship of husband and wife I would suggest first the need for obedience to God's commands you know that most of your problems as a married couple could be worked out pretty simply get on your knees open Ephesians 5 read and then pray God forgive me that I haven't been doing that and God helped me to do that what five minutes not saying we should rush through it like that well yeah that's it now we can go play you know Phase 10 baby you know everything's great whatever you see what I'm saying we we over complicate now I realize you know there's a there's the principle of a general practitioner a doctor that you know can can prescribe a solution for lots of things but sometimes people need Specialists sometimes you need a a brain you know Specialist or neurologist and there's a place for that there's a place for that sort of a thing but but for the most part the EV and flow of the Christian Life if we got on our faces before God and we're willing to repent humble ourselves and actually do what God Said has we'd probably iron out a lot of our issues just like that that quick honestly secondly we need to understand the blessing of reciprocity in obedience to God's commands the goodness of marriage when both parties comply see we always just think that that the thing in itself is a blessing children are a blessing from the Lord not if you don't pray for them not if you don't discipline them not if I'm not saying they're you know monsters but they can be monsters it takes effort it takes work so does a good marriage Brethren it doesn't just fall out of he why we just got a perfect marriage don't be lucky no usually you have to work at it you you can't just expect these things to iron themselves out or work these things out you have to work at it and then I would suggest the ease of compliance when both parties obey I alluded to this last time if I'm loving my wife the way I'm supposed to be I've got to think it's going to make her job of submission to me a little easier and if she's submitting to me the way that she's supposed to do I think that it makes my job of loving her a bit easier again it's not going to be blemish free it's not going to be without spot a wrinkle or any such thing there's going to be issues going to be challenges and all that sort of thing but far fewer than when we're both butting heads and neither of us are willing to obey God's word that's the key that's the instruction here and then as I mentioned before the the the preparation for marriage should include much meditation upon Ephesians 5:22 to 33 if you're a single that wants to get married learn what this passage says and pray for somebody that fits the bill but pray that you'll be somebody that fits the bill God send me a wife that submits no first pray God help me to love a woman the way Christ loves the church and then finally I think the onus is on the Redemptive work of our Lord Jesus this is a great mystery but I speak concerning Christ and the church verse 32 Paul draws out the truth of particular Redemption he loved the church and he gave himself for her he speaks concerning the efficacy of the blood and righteousness of our Lord Jesus Christ and he speaks concerning the glory of the Eternal State when we are presented to him as a glorious Church Without spot or wrinkle or any such thing the Apostle in the context of dealing with husbands and wives can cannot help himself from engaging in that high and glorious and wondrous christology that we've come to expect from the Apostle Paul and we love and we appreciate may God indeed bless us not only as a church but as individuals and as families so that we may indeed do what the Lord calls us to and conduct ourselves in a manner that is consistent with the gospel well let us pray Our Father in heaven we thank you for your word we thank you for the instruction that we find here in Ephesians 5 we pray for your blessing upon us we pray for your grace we pray for the aid and assistance of the holy spirit that we may be enable to comply and I pray that you would go with us now watch over us in this coming week and be glorified in the midst of our in the midst of our lives and we pray through Christ Our Lord amen we'll close with a brief time of meditation